<p>I have crystal from my great aunt but I rarely use it. ( it is etched & kind of fussy looking) most is packed away, I don’t have much cupboard space.</p>
<p>I do love the acrylic champagne flutes that you can even take camping!
( perhaps I should give my friends a set of polycarbonate glasses for next time I come over!)</p>
<p>I haven’t seen anyone put plastic on furniture since the 60s, but I do have custom made seat covers for my Jeep. </p>
<p>The glasses we use everyday are mostly Arcoroc or whatever they had on sale at Fred Meyer when I decided we needed more.</p>
<p>Years ago, my best friend’s devil child broke one of my Waterford water goblets. It was Valentine’s Day, and we had gotten our families together to cook a nice meal. Our kids were between 2-3 years old. The little brat did it on purpose, when no one was looking … I found it later (and yes, I do know that he did it, and it was on purpose). I decided to just let it go, because my friendship is more important than my glass.</p>
<p>Now, so many years later, the little brat is an amazing young man. He would be mortified if he ever knew what he was truly like once upon a time (turns out he had medical issues that made him feel miserable & he was acting out - surgery cured his issues when he was relatively young). I am SO glad I never told my friend.</p>
<p>If someone broke one of my regular glass wine glasses, I wouldn’t even blink. Actually, my brother did do that once … and he was so gracious about jumping up to clean up the red wine spill on the carpet, I didn’t even think about the broken glass.</p>
<p>My sil once broke a Lennox vase of mine. I think she bought me a replacement. What she didn’t know was I didn’t particularly care for the vase, but it was given to me by my best friend who died a month before my wedding. I got married without a maid of honor. Even still I was sad it got broken, but I have my memories and an item isn’t really that important.</p>
<p>And funny enough -she is a wrecking ball of a bull in a china shop, her little kids are exactly the same. </p>
<p>I don’t care about stuff, but I don’t want to see little kids purposefully heading straight for breakable items just for the fun of breaking them.</p>
<p>I too have arrived at the age when I would rather use something than have it in the back of the cupboard out of sight and out of mind. I feel I have wasted too many years of “protecting” the nice things. Occasional breakage is the price to pay for using it. I recently put a chip in a favorite vase that was given to my mother as a wedding present. I feel badly about it but am still glad I used it regularly. Chips happen.</p>
<p>When a guest breaks a dish, I only expect an apology. Then we move on. Blueiguana, I loved your post #35. Very well said. It’s just stuff.</p>
<p>I will say that the thick glass salad bowl which a friend (guy) chipped by banging the tongs on the edge that first summer I was married, yah, I admit it, I still remember cringing when he did that every time I use it. Somehow., broken & out of sight may be less memorable than the chip I see every time.</p>
<p>None of my older relatives and I had plastic covers on couches. Only saw that in some homes of some friends’ grandparents from the Greatest Generation. </p>
<p>As for hosting guests and limits on areas of the home, only the bedrooms are off-limits unless the host gives the ok to respect the privacy of the host, his/her family members, or guests. </p>
<p>This was not only followed by my own extended families, but by every roommate I’ve had. When hosting parties with friends or relatives, the bedroom doors are usually closed unless the one who lives in that bedroom is cool with allowing guests access in that specific instance. </p>
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<p>Definitely a generation gap. Older cousins who did that would have been punished and expected to perform the repairs/pay for it themselves. Then again, they grew up in the '60s - '80s in areas where parents weren’t as tolerant of anyone carelessly damaging things or parts of the home. </p>
<p>In contrast, I’ve noticed folks of my age and younger tend to have parents who are much more blase about breaking things and expecting the one whose item was damaged in a dorm/roommate or guest situation to forgive the damages…even if we’re talking items such as laptop computers or musical instruments*. </p>
<p>In short, there’s a marked difference between the older generations’ expectation that the onus of responsibility for breaking/damaging due to carelessness should be mainly/solely on the one who was careless versus the seemingly current one where it seems more fashionable to place half/most of the onus on the host/possessor of the item for making it accessible in their own home or sometimes…for even merely possessing it. </p>
<p>The latter notion would have been viewed by the older generation(Greatest Generation/Silent Generation) as “blaming the victim” and encouraging the careless individual to avoid accountability/responsibility for their actions. </p>
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<li>I’ve lost count of how many folks in my age group and younger have alienated themselves from friends and acquaintances because of that blase attitude. Fortunately, a couple of younger friends were amenable enough to be receptive of my perspectives after they wondered why their college dormmates were angry with them to the point of ostracizing them. Once they came around to being more careful around others’ stuff in their dwellings and to be proactive about offering apologies rather than giving off a IMO rude blase “What’s the big deal?” vibe, they were able to rebuild those strained relationships.</li>
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<p>My kids would be upset if any of their things were broken. They also do not lend their clothes, shoes or jewelry to friends. I don’t think it is a generational thing.</p>
<p>I should have been more clear that not everyone of my generation(Late Gen X) or later are blase. However, I have noticed this blase attitude is much more prevalent among those of my and younger generations especially boys/young men and their boomer/early Gen X parents. </p>
<p>In fact, the issues I’ve seen were mostly perpetuated by boys/young men with the exception of one young woman who borrowed a friend’s expensive foreign import DVD box set and returned it with the discs heavily soaked in sesame oil and then wondered why he was so upset about it. :(</p>
<p>I think you misunderstood my statements Cobrat. The comment about rooms being off limits was not in relation to guests, but my own children. Growing up it was very common for my friends to have formal rooms they didn’t step into except for special occasions. When I entertain it’s always informally so I don’t specifically have any part of the house off limits. When the kids were younger I preferred they all stay in the finished basement as opposed to their bedrooms so the mess was contained and easier to clean up.</p>
<p>Again the comment about drywall, nerf swords, and backpacks is taken out of context, or at least not understood how I intended. This has nothing to do with entertaining. This was simply a comment about my own family to illustrated our home is not a showcase. My friends children never ran around my home swinging their backpacks. If something happens when a guest is here it’s nbd. That’s what I meant.</p>
<p>Breaking things in dorm rooms, breaking valuables in a home, and children breaking expensive crystal they have no business touching are all distinguishable from accidentally dropping a glass. Handling a glass is inherent to its use and you are not borrowing it when you use it at a dinner party. It is expected that over a lifetime a glass or two will break and, no, the host is not a victim. Dropping a computer, a vase, a picture frame, a lamp, etc. is completely different.</p>
<p>cartera, I was thinking the same thing. A glass can be broken during use without the user having been careless. Accidents happen, even to well meaning, thoughtful, and careful folks who respect other’s belongings. I have to say I’ve never had a guest in my home who I didn’t think was careful and respectful of our things. But spills, a broken chair, a soiled tablecloth, and maybe a broken glass every few years has happened, even though my guests are considerate and thoughtful. When my guest broke the chair, I was so relieved he didn’t hurt himself! I also wished I could have alleviated his embarrassment. What helped the awkward moment was his joke about suing us. “Hmmm- nice house you have here…” It cracked everyone at the party up, and all was well.<br>
Accidents happen. There isn’t always a “victim” and a “perpetrator.”</p>
<p>We had a friend who sat and one of our chairs broke. The next day DH and I replaced all of the chairs in that set. I was also grateful our guest wasn’t hurt.</p>
<p>2016BarnardMom’s comment above is close to my own personal inclinations. Only difference I have is as a guest I wouldn’t hold it against my host if he/she ended up taking me up on my offer to replace the broken item in question. </p>
<p>Among those of my parents’ generation and their similarly aged American neighbors, having the hope the host wouldn’t take up my offer to pay for damages I incurred would be considered a sign of a presumptuously entitled attitude on the part of the guest.</p>
<p>well Im happy to say that I don’t think either of my kids are very tied to things, although they certainly didn’t encourage their friends to be careless. They do enjoy sharing books and clothes amongst other things with friends ( although I admit I was very sad when a bookcase that my dad * who died in 1975* had made was broken/ lost. My oldest daughter had been using it at school then stored it at a friends house)</p>
<p>When younger D travels ( to developing countries) she packs with the intent to give most of her clothes away ( leaving more room for souvenirs) and even though her ipod touch was killed on one of her last trips when someone dropped it, she was philosophical. She also plans for damage/loss when traveling & doesn’t take anything she could not stand to part with.
I think she is very wise.</p>
<p>My late grandmother in law came from Italy as a young adult. I don’t know if it was ethnicity or age, but she and her sisters and circle of friends always had their furniture covered in plastic.</p>
<p>I have never had china or crystal to worry about, but I do display my dollhouse in my dining room and I don’t prefer that anyone touch it, even my kids. My son is very territorial about his musical instruments and my daughter is the same way about her swords. They usually keep them safely away, but on the rare occasion that they don’t, those items are magnetic to other kids.</p>
<p>I saw plastic covered furniture among folks ranging from African-Americans, Jews, White ethnics, Hispanics, etc. Only commonalities I saw was that they were all working/lower-middle class and were from the Greatest/Silent Generation and before.</p>
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<p>Swords? Is she a practicing martial artist or pre-modern military rein-actor?</p>
<p>She is a fencer cobrat, and I do think it is at least partially ethnic with my late grandmother in law. What do your cousins think about little old ladies who immigrated from southern Italy about 70 years ago and kept plastic on their furniture? I am sure you and they have discussed this specific situation in great depth.</p>
<p>Cobrat - you are prone to broad generalizations. I shared earlier that my grandparents had covers on the living room furniture and I saw it a result of living through the depression. Where you are wrong is they were not working class or really middle class in any way. I’d have no problem saying so if they were, but it’s not the case.</p>
and even though her ipod touch was killed on one of her last trips when someone dropped it, she was philosophical. She also plans for damage/loss when traveling & doesn’t take anything she could not stand to part with.