Battle hymn of the tiger mother

<p>aka the other extreme of bad parenting.
Discuss. Right. Meow!</p>

<p>As an Asian, reading the article, I fondly reminisced about my childhood…</p>

<p>Okay, not really. My mom was never THAT pushy. I have nothing against her ideals (having been raised with the same - that I should be excelling at everything), but really, depriving the kid of food and toilet breaks?? That’s just inhumane.</p>

<p>Plus, I think she was lucky to have children who were actually talented in music and smart. You can’t force something out of nothing…</p>

<p>Having said this, I’ve only read the WSJ article. I’ve heard that the book itself is about Amy Chua retreating from her parenting model of “strict immigrant parent”. If so, I congratulate her for being flexible enough to change when it was clear that her daughters were no longer responding to that particular parenting style.</p>

<p>Not the type of parenting that I’d champion… I have friends who had “tiger” moms and dads. They’re smart but rather haunted psychologically haha. Have you read Waldman’s response, “In Defense of the Western Mom”? I like her conclusion much better:</p>

<p>[Ayelet</a> Waldman on Amy Chua’s ‘Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother’ -](<a href=“Ayelet Waldman on Amy Chua's 'Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother' - WSJ”>Ayelet Waldman on Amy Chua's 'Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother' - WSJ)</p>

<p>I want to see what her daughters are like.</p>

<p>If this were facebook, I’d like that post^, Batman.</p>

<p>Apparently one of them spoke out. And i quote:
"Everybody’s talking about the birthday cards we once made for you, which you rejected because they weren’t good enough. Funny how some people are convinced that Lulu and I are scarred for life. Maybe if I had poured my heart into it, I would have been upset. But let’s face it: The card was feeble, and I was busted. It took me 30 seconds; I didn’t even sharpen the pencil. That’s why, when you rejected it, I didn’t feel you were rejecting me. If I actually tried my best at something, you’d never throw it back in my face“
This is from the daughter who was supposed to be more obedient. But I feel a child really wouldn’t know why she was getting rejected. It’s completely hindsight observation.</p>

<p>idontgetit. why cant they play any instrument besides the piano or violin? isnt the cello also a fairly “intellectual” instrument? </p>

<p>that is one crazy mom.</p>

<p>I wonder how passionate the daughter is when playing piano. I’ve been playing since I was 4 and I’ve been to a lot of those peer show-off recitals and man, some of those kids were absolute robots. I think the tree outside my apartment has more passion swinging in the wind than those kids playing.</p>

<p>I know they are rare in numbers, but the self-motivated kid (whether he is Asian, caucasian, hispanic, ect.) who doesn’t have pushy parents and is studying hard on his own will and for his own good rather than for others is the BEST type of student. </p>

<p>I don’t believe in forcing your values and views down your children. They should chose to be passionate about something. This is especially true in music. Acting like a robot can only take you so far; the most successful musicians are those who are passionate and are doing it for themselves. </p>

<p>And as far as I know, this woman is atypical of Asian parents. Sure, most Asian parents are tough but this is a tad too far and crazy and controlling.</p>

<p>As much as I respect the Asian emphasis on hard work and education, I belief the western form of parenting when done correctly is superior. I’ve met plenty of white friends who study their butts off but have “relaxed” parents.</p>

<p>@jimmihendrix: sure, but what about the average students of each respective upbringing?</p>

<p>I grew up in a childhood similar to what Chua wrote about (except my dad was the strict one, not my mom), so…I kind of thought the book was funny; somehow I feel like that makes me a bad person…ish? lol</p>

<p>I was brought up similarly by my parents, but I think Western parents have this notion that children are fragile whereas Chua’s parenting style has a steadfast belief that the child can do anything. That’s admirable. It’s like the kid is a blank canvas and whatever parental nurturing is provided can manifest as talent in due time. It worked, to be honest. I was by no means a humble high schooler, but there were enough humiliating experiences that I know my place, but at the same time, I’m still determined to do better than I’ve ever done before. I say the only reason I’m like that is because I wasn’t coddled as a child (I was more coddled in high school than in elementary school, actually), and I was shown that I always had room to grow. I say props to Chua, but the WSJ article makes her sound maniacal. I mean, the difference between Chua’s anecdotes and Waldman’s anecdotes are that Waldman actually believed her child had limitations whereas Chua never mentions the fallibility of her child.</p>

<p>Her daughters must have attended Berkeley…</p>

<p>Material success at the cost of individuality. No thank you.</p>



<p>Chua makes Chua sound maniacal. I see what she does, she’s trying to push her children to their limits so that they can have the best possible opportunities. I just think she’s going about it the wrong way. I personally think there’s more to life than just academics and college. If you don’t get into an IVY it isn’t the end of the world, but i’m sure some people would disagree (Chua’s a law teacher at yale lolol)</p>



<p>In her interview with Stephen Colbert, she said there were tiger fathers too.</p>

<p>‘Tiger Mom’ Didn’t ‘Expect This Level of Intensity’
<a href=“'Tiger Mom' Didn't 'Expect This Level of Intensity' - ABC News”>;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Zombie School… :/</p>

<p>Well if you print the most horrible aspects of the book, how do you not expect the backlash? And I still call bollocks to her daughter’s statement about the Mother’s Day card.</p>

<p>^exactly.she should at least take some responsibility for what she had decided to publish instead of asking the readers why they think of her that way.
with her level of education, she should know perfectly well what her message is getting at.</p>