Hello, my son is entering 9th grade at a school in Fremont, and as parents new to the U.S. education system, we’re trying to understand how best to support him in planning for high school and college.
At this point, we’re still unsure about his long-term academic interests or intended major. He’s an average student overall, but he does well in math, has strong speaking/oratory skills (though he’s not particularly interested in debate), and is a very social child. He doesn’t show a strong passion for science, engineering, or technology, but seems comfortable with subjects like math, English, and history.
One challenge is that he doesn’t yet have strong extracurricular involvement. Since he’s already entering high school, we’re wondering what activities or programs would provide the best return on investment if he starts now.
We’ve heard that some students take summer courses—such as AP preparation, math acceleration, or other classes that help them get ahead academically—but as newcomers to the U.S. system, we’re unclear on what options are available, how enrollment works, and whether these are worthwhile. People often seem to already know this information, and we feel a bit lost.
We’d also appreciate advice on extracurriculars:
Is it too late to start activities like debate?
Would joining Boy Scouts at this stage still be valuable, even if reaching Eagle Scout may not be realistic?
Are there other extracurriculars that make sense for someone starting in 9th grade?
Since he doesn’t seem naturally drawn to engineering or tech, we’re also wondering whether a future path involving economics, business, math, public policy, communications, or similar fields might be a better fit. If so, what should we be doing starting in the summer after 8th grade and throughout high school to help him build toward strong college options?
Our goal is to help him explore genuinely suitable paths while also making informed choices that keep good college opportunities open. Any guidance from parents or those familiar with the U.S. high school/college admissions system would be greatly appreciated.
Welcome!
Did your family have (or is scheduled to have) an intake meeting of some kind with a guidance counselor at the new school? That’s a great time to ask about clubs, activities, volunteer involvement in the community, etc. that the HS has and supports.
Have you visited the public library yet? Mine has flyers galore about different programs– writing circles, tutoring 3rd graders (many of whom are ESL), volunteering for different events and activities.
Boy Scouts is a great activity- social and community.
Is there a sport or athletic activity he likes? Doesn’t need to be a team sport– just swimming for exercise at the town pool or YMCA is a way to meet people and get involved.
Is there a “newcomers club”? Most are targeted to parents, but often have the activities geared towards families. Great way to hear about what other kids in your neighborhood do for fun, to volunteer, civic engagement, etc.
Your school should decide the path with placement exams or otherwise.
The crowd you are hearing - SAT prep, APs beyond Human Geography, are putting waaaay too much stress on their kids. It’s not normal.
If your student is average, they likely belong on a regular track but the school should decide. They might decide to join a club or two or band or a sport or to walk dogs at a shelter. They should do what they enjoy - I can’t think of a school - maybe a handful that care about ECs and major relation. Those that care about ECs and more likely don’t than do, want you to do something you enjoy, get tenure, and build responsibility if you are in model UN and study engineering, no issue if you are in robotics and study poli sci, no issue. And as I said - most won’t care - beyond your academics and test.
So if they decide to do nothing as they acclimate, that’s ok too. So many busy their bitts on ECs and go to great colleges - like Arizona or Penn State - that don’t even evaluate them. It’s GPA/SAT.
Most importantly, let your 14 year old be 14. It doesn’t matter that he doesn’t have a defined academic interest. Heck, mine had 4 majors he thought about during junior year alone. Many go to college without majors. Many colleges don’t even let you choose a major until the end of your first or second year.
Many on here want to keep up with the Joneses but that’s not the reality of most. It’s a tiny tiny subset of kids that are on here.
Your student should be as they want but the school should be guiding you as to classes.
You don’t need self study AP, summer APs or test prep, certainly not b4 the summer of 11th grade.
It’s hard enough to acclimate as a new student. No additional stress is needed. Really. It will all be ok without having life decided by 16.
- The vast majority of college applicants never take a summer or online course in addition to what they take at their high school.
- In terms of extracurricular…your kid should do things they like and want to do…not things anyone thinks will impress some college adcom in a few years. ECS can be sports, school clubs, a part time job, volunteering someplace, music or the arts, drama, etc. Your kid should choose…and there needn’t be a cost to you for ECs.
- In my opinion, you should not be concerned about packaging your 9th grader for a future college major or career. This is something that the student should be choosing and it could take time. Many colleges do not admit by major, and majors aren’t declared until sophomore year of college. AND many many college students switch majors multiple times. Add to that, there are careers that seem favorable now that might not be in 8 years when your kid graduates from college. And there are careers that aren’t even on anyone’s radar screen now that could pop up during that time.
- It’s not too late to start any EC…if it’s an EC your kid really wants to do. If he wants to be on the debate team, he should reach out to the debate coach at his high school when he starts.
- And lastly, I know you want the very best for this young student, but please let them be a high school student, make friends, do social things, etc. These are years he will never get back, so allow for some enjoyment, not just academic push for college.
In my opinion, you may be investing a significant amount of time, energy, and resources into things that are unlikely to materially improve your son’s chances of getting into a better college.
The college admissions process is highly unpredictable, and encouraging your son to participate in activities he isn’t genuinely interested in probably won’t produce the kind of authentic impact that stands out to admissions officers.
Meaningful impact usually comes from students pursuing things they genuinely care about, not activities chosen for them by their parents.
First, welcome to an often confusing system. Neither my wife nor I had any experience with this system either, so I understand your confusion.
I see that while I was writing this, other wrote similar stuff, but I’ve already written this, so some extra stuff for you to read (which mostly agrees with what others have written)
First - don’t get caught up in the insanity that grips some people in the belief that College Admissions Begin In Freshman Year Of High School. They don’t. High school is what begins in Freshman year, and high school should be the primary focus of you and your kid. There are only two things related to colleges that you should care about at this point.
First, finances, because college is often expensive, and starting financial planning early is smart.
Second, check out what the standard requirements are for the courses that are expected from high school graduates - how many years and what levels of English, Foreign Language, Math, Social sciences, Life Sciences, PE, etc. You will meet with their Counselor and talk over their four year plan, so remember that. As long as they have the required courses, everything beyond that depends on the kid’s interests.
Looking at his interests, he should probably check out the additional offerings in social sciences, offerings by the English department and other humanities. Regarding math, he should have four years of math on his four year plan, and I would say to leave the possibilities of further courses open. He should take the first year math course/courses that provide him the most choices for further courses.
Summer prep classes
AP prep, math acceleration, etc, are only needed if the kid is either falling behind during the year, or the classes in school don’t provide what he needs. AP prep is the same - if he’s getting an A or a B in AP Bio, and students in the school with these grades generally get 4 or 5 on AP Bio, that means that he’s getting the preparation that he needs. There are summer programs in classes that high schools don’t always have, like the aerospace engineering, and those are worthwhile. Otherwise, summer activities engaging in things that you kid enjoy are better.
APs
That is another fallacy that kids and parents fall into - the AP Arms Race. The idea that “the more APs, the better”. Depending om what the school offers and when they allow the kids to start taking AP classes, it is rarely worthwhile to take more than 10 (or even fewer). The APs that he should take are usually the ones related to his interests and eventually his potential major. In your kid’s case, it sounds like social sciences APs should be the focus, with perhaps the Calc sequence (social sciences often utilize math as much as life and physical sciences do). Probably no need for AP Bio, Chem, of physics (though he would benefit from classes in these as well). No need for APs just of sake of having more APs.
AP tests are generally optional, but in most cases, if the kid is doing well in the class, taking the AP test is not much additional effort, and can be beneficial in some cases. As a rule (with a few exception), self-studying for AP tests for which a student didn’t take the class are a waste of money, time, and effort.
Extra-Curriculars:
No.
Yes. If your kid wants to do Boy Scouts, he should. It’s only a waste of time if he’s not enjoying it.
Extra curriculars are for your kid’s benefit, not “for colleges”. They should reflect your kid’s interests, passions, etc. They can be related to what he wants to do in life, they can also be related to stuff that he wants to explore. As I wrote above, there are summer classes and summer camps in all sorts of things, and they can be very useful as a well and being a lot of fun. In general, almost any productive activity is good except sitting around and doing nothing.
There are a few types of extracurriculars to avoid, though. First and foremost, he should not “establish a non-profit” unless there is no existing organization that engages in a specific topic that he feels very strongly about. Otherwise, he should find a local organization that does this, or find a national organization and ask them to establish a local branch (or ask for them to help him establish a local branch). If neither is possible he should probably engage in another activity that does have existing infrastructure.
Second, he should avoid extracurriculars that “demonstrate entrepreneurship”, in which he “establishes a business” which is, in reality, you or other adults in his life establishing the business with their money and their resources, with his name on the paperwork.
PS. my kid took 8 APs, only did 5 AP tests (the school offers a very large number), and did not engage in ECs that generally win state or national awards. She attended a top Liberal Arts college on a full tuition scholarship, mostly as a result of her ECs (her academic record did influence the college she attended, though).
Do you know this to be to case or are surmising it to be the case ?
Other than auto admit stat based schools or talent / athletic scholarships, I’m not sure anyone truly knows why they got in.
This. Above all, please let your kid be a teenager and not feel pressured all the way through high school that everything he does has to be viewed through the lens of how it will look on a college application. As others have said - let him do what interests him the most, and that will be enough for the ECs angle. We are also immigrants btw, immigrated when my oldest was halfway through 8th grade, so I exactly understand how you feel.
Welcome to the Bay Area! I’ve raised my kids in the Bay Area, not in Fremont, and have one in college and one in high school. If your kid loves the outdoors you could not be in a better location, and if he does not that might be something to be nurtured during your time here. Having an outlet like hiking, camping, running, climbing, biking, surfing, fishing, swimming, sailing, any other water sport or even skiing is something that will greatly help him deal with the stress of high school and being a Bay Area teen. In terms of other activities, perhaps let him take the lead on exploring as many interests as possible and then he will probably narrow his focus as he gets older.
The most essential piece of advice is to not overburden your kid with academic commitments that are not part of his high school schedule, unless he asks for it - even then there should be a limit. I know this will be very hard to resist because Bay Area kids are pushed to be “grinders” and the grind culture here is revered. The competition in the Bay Area is insane and toxic and high schoolers and their parents can easily get caught up in it. Focus on what makes your kid happy that does not involve admission to a certain group of colleges.
As a family take time to enjoy all the amazing food here and the endless day trip and weekend excursions. These four years will be over in a flash.
It was a leadership-based scholarship, so yes, it was the case.
Note that Scouting America is now coed.
Will your child be starting HS after an American Middle School or after middle school abroad?
This may be true in CA but for other parents reading this thread, sometimes the graduation requirements for HS are well below what colleges are looking for.
I’d recommend 4 years of all cores subjects - math, English, science (1 yr each of bio, chem, physics, and then an AP of your choice based on interest), history, and foreign language. And I believe CA has an arts requirement as well.
Same, and I note I recommend it in part for the same reasons the more selective colleges might prefer it. That sort of HS curriculum will prepare you well for a wide variety of college classes. This is helpful in part because most US colleges have “gen ed” requirements that will mean you need to take a variety of classes. But it also means if you start at college and realize you actually want to do something quite different from what you originally expected, as happens quite a bit, you will be well-prepared to make such a change.
On public web sites, you can see that the Fremont Unified School District (not Fremont Union High School District, which is not in Fremont, CA) has:
- Five regular high schools. District also has elementary and middle schools.
- Six class periods (so four years each of five subjects plus art plus health and PE might be a tight fit).
- Graduation requirements which are less than UC/CSU entrance requirements.
- Graduates to four year colleges ranging from about a quarter to three quarters, depending on which high school. Many or most others go to community colleges or vocational programs.
- 11% to 46% economically disadvantaged students, depending on which high school, and all high schools have >85% minority enrollment.
I am sure this is true of every CA public school, but fyi at my kids’ school they provide a tandem UC a-g list so that families understand what the difference is and where the students stack up on each basis.
First, you are smart to develop an understanding now. Nothing is worse than that “if only I had known” discovery!
Second, your goal should always be for your child to be the best possible version of himself. It’s tempting to think that by cracking some code, you can make your kid into a perfect applicant, but it doesn’t work and it doesn’t serve anyone well. It doesn’t sound like you are trying to do that, but guessing you’ll meet folks in your area who are.
My first piece of advice is for you as parents to get a good understanding of college costs and a good understanding of the public options in your state, both costs and admissions criteria and requirements. This can very much shape your goals early on.
As for your son, I would encourage him to explore his interests and to push himself in the things that he enjoys and does well. So maybe honors English, but no need to acceleratein math. My guess is that 9th grade is pretty standard for all students. I’d advise keeping options open because students change at this age, so understand any tracking or prerequisites at your school. If he takes general English in 9th, can he move to honors in 10th? Our LPS made that very difficult, so if you wanted to preserve that honors option, you needed to start in honors. It’s easier to drop back than to catch up to a higher level, even at schools with flexibility.
When colleges look at ECs, they are looking to see how a kid spends their free time. Don’t pick these for admissions purposes. These should be things that excite your son. If debate is that, perfect. Scouting near me rarely attracts new members in high school - it tends to be the kids who have always done it and stuck with it. That doesn’t mean it’s not an option (or that it’slike that near you), but as a “new kid”, that could be especially hard if he’s not really into it. Your school will probably have lots of options. Literary magazine, newspaper, ski club, debate, MUN, etc. The affinity groups at DS’ school were really active and organized lots of fun events. Not sure if any might appeal. It’s okay to try something and decide it’s not for them.
Wishing you luck. Moving is hard for everyone in the family.
LA, SF, Oakland, San Jose, and San Diego school districts have high school graduation subject requirements that substantially mirror UC/CSU subject requirements in academic courses (plus stuff like health and PE). Of course, not all graduates become UC/CSU eligible due to grades/GPA.
Ok, interesting that certain public school districts have requirements in excess of what is required by the state. Or maybe I’m confusing required with recommended.
Those districts may have pockets of concentrations of FGLI students and limited counseling resources which could allow some of them unintentionally to shut themselves out from being prepared for college if they and their parents are initially looking only to fulfill high school graduation requirements. Making high school graduation requirements match college entrance requirements keeps them on the college readiness track as much as possible, keeping their options open as much as possible. Even those who do not meet CSU grade/GPA minimums would be more ready for community college or vocational programs than otherwise.