Well, if she were my child I’d expand her list of schools beyond “top 25.” Regardless of legacy, the schools you mentioned are reaches for everyone, although I heard from UPenn adcom that legacy there does increase your chances substantially. Brown I’m not sure. Frankly IMHO the top at least 50 or so schools have virtually the same level of faculty and student body as the Ivies. The Ivies are only so big. Those students and faculty need to go somewhere. Getting into one of the top 25 will not greatly influence her life–this is UNDERGRAD after all, not grad school. Grad schools while somewhat swayed by the signaling of a Top 25 or a Top 50, in general care more about what else you can bring to the grad program. Harvard Law accepts students from a extremely generous range of schools, for example. They publish the list online. Ph.D. programs pull from an even larger list, I suspect, but you can look at this from another angle and look up Ph.D. feeder schools if you’re interested. Schools that might surprise you appear on those lists, such as Earlham and Kalamazoo or St. Johns of Annapolis–a school which often doesn’t even fill each year (and I consider a hidden gem for the right student.)
With that in mind my first piece of advice would be: relax. There’s room in great schools and there’s no need to be anxious about Getting Into The Top School Now! Instead I’d choose by type of student body–the school community atmosphere and course offerings–rather than a random number in a ranking by some magazine. But that’s just me. My reasoning would be that if she’s comfortable she’ll flourish. College is stressful enough. Being twice exceptional adds more stress. Maybe reducing that stress level would be a good idea.
To do that my first consideration if she were my child (after how do I pay for this) would be how competitive the students are with each other. Reducing the competitiveness among the students will improve her life at college. She can still get an excellent education in student bodies that are kind to each other and cooperative. As she identifies as female, she may want to consider two colleges where the administration of the school works explicitly with the student body to create a cooperative, congenial atmosphere. Those schools are Mt. Holyoke and Bryn Mawr. In addition to top academics and kind atmospheres, both schools also offer–1) consortia where the student can cross register at a number of other great schools and free transportation to get the student to those schools; 2) the schools are gorgeous and have great facilities; 3) they have excellent financial aid; 4) the education is excellent. Mt. H you can take classes also at Smith, Hampshire, UMass Amherst, and Amherst. BMC you can take classes at Haverford, Swarthmore, UPenn. Another school that at least used to not be competitive among its students was Vassar. I’ve heard good things about Grinnell too, but haven’t confirmed them.
Schools that I would rule out for having overly competitive student bodies include UChicago; Johns Hopkins; Harvard; Swarthmore (but taking a class or two there might be fun); Wellesley and to some extent Smith; Harvey Mudd; MIT; Princeton
For engineering if she’s interested, I’d look at Olin for creating a cooperative rather than competitive atmosphere among its students.
Schools that are lower in the rankings but still offer nice educations and nice atmospheres include IMHO: Earlham; Muhlenberg; Simmons; Agnes Scott; Mills; Wheaton in Massachusetts; Connecticut College; Kalamazoo; St. Olaf (very nice school); Hendrix; Hampshire; Beloit, Knox
If you can afford it and aren’t so interested in FA, you may want to consider Columbia GS. (Penn also has a similar program.) GS has the least restrictive gap requirements (as little as 6 months) for entry into the program. Here’s why it might work for you. 1) it is the exact same education as Columbia college. 2) the pressure is reduced for your child because she would be able to reduce the number of classes she takes. There’s no minimum at GS; 3) prestige: it’s the exact same education as CU college and employers and grad schools treat GS students the same as CU college grads. Be aware, though, that the housing for GS students is not guaranteed. You should assume that you’d need to locate housing on your own. Barnard is another CU undergrad college she should consider as Barnard doesn’t include the core, which depending on your child may or may not be a cause of stress.