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<p>But how is this different from transgendered?</p>
<p>emerald, I’m not sure what you mean. My point is, if that is the definition of bigendered, then aren’t we pretty much all bigendered to varying degrees?</p>
<p>Yes – that’s exactly how I read it. 
Silly! I thought it meant someone with a large butt! I’m in favor of Bi-Gender AND Big-Enders! Live and let live!!</p>
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<p>OK, so what are you expecting from us? You’re having a conversation with me, and for the first five minutes you’re a guy, and then you’re a woman, and back to a man? How am I supposed to even notice this? And if I do notice it, what am I supposed to do? </p>
<p>You say that you have some traditionally male traits, and some traditionally female traits. OK, so that means-- you’re the same as everybody else, because everybody has some traits that are more characteristic of the other gender. Or, if not everybody, at least most people have some “male” traits and some “female” traits.</p>
<p>So if I want to giggle, I’m a woman, but then when I want to talk about math or tools or something, then I’m a guy? Or how does this work? </p>
<p>Just for the record, I read it as big-enders too.</p>
<p>Today I was describing my feeling of confusion over what gender I am supposed to be to my best friend and she told me she thinks I am bi-gendered. I had never heard of the term so I looked it up and found that it described me very well. I’m no expert but I’d like to just put out there what I think. For me its much more than just expressing certain traits that are typical of both genders. It’s about how I feel. Some days I feel like a man ( I am biologically female), on these days I dress differently, my mannerisms are different, I will find myself accidentally referring to myself as a male. There is a change inside of me. Some days I close my eyes, think about who I feel I am, and then open my eyes to find my body doesn’t match. And other days I dress girly, I think of myself as a girl and most importantly I feel as if I am a girl. Funny enough, I sort my clothes into girly and not girly. I never really thought too much about it until today but now it seems to make sense.</p>
<p>To be honest, I’m bigendered and I’m a lesbian. My body is a females and I am expected to act a certain way. But then I switch to a male mind. Like deep voice, don’t shave, don’t dress up, I’m not a girl but I’m not a boy. I consider myself an alien because I am neither. I don’t and will not accept that I am a woman. I just feel uncomfortable. It’s not about how to identify bigenderism, bigenderism is being neither male nor female.</p>
<p>t*'s not about how to identify bigenderism, bigenderism is being neither male nor female.*</p>
<p>Or perhaps it is about having a broader mindset than rigidly defined gender roles.
;)</p>
<p>Does anyone know any support groups? I just feel alone</p>
<p>I think that perhaps the feelings you describe are encompassed by what’s generally called “genderqueer,” which is an infinitely more common term than bigendered. I know that there are lots of genderqueer suppport groups, both online and in person; although I don’t know of any specifically, I’m sure they wouldn’t be difficult to find. Good luck. I am quite sure that you will find out that you’re by no means alone.</p>
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<p>I very much agree with this.</p>
<p>"I would also be very careful about ascribing “male” and “female” to particular frames of mind, thought patterns, attitudes, behaviors, likes and dislikes, etc., held by a single person. Gender is a spectrum, not a binary divided by a fine line (in my opinion). </p>
<p>I very much agree with this also. It smacks of raging sexism (though I don’t know on which side), for example, to decide when you’re crying and weak you’re showing your feminine side, and when you’re tough and strong, it’s your male side. Acting “ultra feminine” as commonly defined would annoy me as much as someone who acted “ultra masculine.” I would be intensely annoyed by someone who went over the top swapping that behavior back and forth, and would not be interested in friendship with someone like that for a minute. That just sounds purely self indulgent. If I didn’t look exactly like a woman, yes, most people would consider my behavior to be more that of a male. So what? We’re all combinations of different charachteristics. It just sounds to me like you want to make yours particularly special. </p>
<p>I am most certain you’ll get the best advice from Donna, who is imminently practical.</p>
<p>And emeraldkity, now I have that dang song in my head, thanks for nothin!</p>
<p>xCreationx, You are not alone. I think Donna provided some excellent advice and I hope you are able to find a welcoming community very soon.</p>
<p>Bigendered seems to refer to something very specific. I hope you find a support system soon. It seems that there would be much to be gained by being able to talk to people who share your orientation.</p>
<p>When I first started reading this thread, I thought that the term “bigendered” might have applied to my mom, who was unquestionably heterosexual and would never have doubted her identity as a women, yet was unusually masculine in her tastes and interests. But as I read through the recent posts, I realized that the definition is narrower.</p>