This question has been something we’ve been struggling with. For a while, we had a deal with zixzaxkid that-- if we are lucky enough to have multiple options-- we will eliminate any that we simply can’t afford, and then she freely chooses from the remaining with no knowledge of the FA differences. Then (about two months ago) she decided she really wants to know the FA picture before she decides. She feels that it should impact her decision (to know what we will need to sacrifice as a family.)
My thinking (still) is that (of the schools that love her, fingers crossed!) she should choose the school that she loves, unfettered by imaging the various financial implications. She feels that her choice (in the case of different levels of offers) potentially impacts her siblings, and she has a responsibility to them to take this into account. I love her inherent goodness, and I am proud of her for her concern, but this is going to be hard for us (as a family) to resolve on M10-- simply because she’s so adamant that FA should be an impacting factor for her decision-making process, and we are so adamant that (after we’ve figured out what we can’t afford) it shouldn’t be a factor at all.