One of “our kids”(a student who used to stay with us on breaks) was in a car accident. My dad sat with him in the hospital for two days until his parents could get there.
My parents were teachers- there was NOTHING they wouldn’t do for a kid trying to get an education!
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I am very impressed with your tenacity!
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Your feelings are completely valid. You’ve worked incredibly hard under circumstances most people wouldn’t even begin to understand, and it’s frustrating to feel like that effort didn’t give you the escape you were hoping for. But let’s take a step back—because even though things feel overwhelming right now, your story isn’t over.
Here’s the reality: you are not starting from nothing. You’ve built resilience, intelligence, and work ethic in ways that many people never have to. That matters. Right now, it may seem like you’re stuck, but you have options, even if they don’t look the way you originally imagined.
What You Can Look Forward To
- College is still a new chapter. Your state school might not be what you dreamed of, but it’s still a chance to gain independence, build a strong academic record, and connect with people who can help you. Even as a commuter, you can get involved in campus life. Clubs, networking events, and internships will open doors you didn’t have before.
- Financial independence is still possible. It sounds like money has been a major barrier, but you will have chances to change that. Work-study, part-time jobs, and internships—even remote ones—could give you more control over your future. Look into scholarships for students with financial hardships. Some colleges have emergency grants or resources for students from low-income backgrounds.
- You’re already proving yourself. Scoring a 1460 on the SAT with barely any instruction? That’s incredible. You’ve already overcome challenges that most people haven’t. The discipline and adaptability you’ve developed will set you apart in the long run.
- Your escape may not be immediate, but it is coming. College isn’t the only path out—internships, summer jobs, or even transferring after a year or two could give you new opportunities. If you keep pushing forward, things will change.
What You Can Do Right Now
- Look for scholarships—many go unclaimed because students don’t apply.
- Get involved at your college—even as a commuter, clubs and campus jobs can give you a sense of belonging.
- Network with professors and advisors—they can help you find better opportunities, recommend you for programs, and even help you transfer if you decide to.
- Find small ways to gain independence—even if it’s just saving small amounts or planning for future steps. or do some entreprenurial skills, work as a teacher assistant , local store etc..
Please take in consideration, You are not behind. You are not a failure. You are not defined by what you’ve missed out on—you’re defined by what you do with what you have. Right now, it feels unfair, and honestly, it is unfair. But you are playing the long game, and you will get out. Your hard work has not been for nothing—it just hasn’t fully paid off yet. Keep going. You’re closer than you think.
thankyou for sharing your experiance! you are not alone! and i do not know you , but i am proud of you! one day you will succeed! pressure builds strong characters!
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