Can we talk about magnet schools? Do colleges care?

[isitmayyet]

My kids attended a similar school. Oldest was the top and thrived, did well in admissions, but plenty of waitlists and rejections too so wasn’t a slam dunk in any way. Youngest it was a huge mistake, bottom of the class, miserable, lost all confidence.

One thing parents from the school say is their kid would have likely done better in admissions game if stayed at home high school, but everyone places a different value on that versus being challenged, unique classes, etc. It’s tough, my thought process is go with mental health being priority, everything else is a distant second.

[happy1]

At this point would it be devastating to your D to drop the program?

My D was a good math student who had a similar issue with her calculus teacher (just terrible – hadn’t taught the subject in a decade or more). One tutor didn’t help but then we switched to a fantastic tutor (who was known to be the best math teacher in the HS) and it made a huge difference. D said the tutor taught her everything she needed for calc (even beyond what her class covered) in 1 hour/week.

Good luck – whatever you do keep your D’s happiness and mental health at the forefront.

[Darcy123]

I’d first look for a different tutor if this one isn’t working. My daughter had a long term sub for one of her math classes as the teacher went on maternity leave. It was an absolute, utter disaster as the sub had absolutely no math background and could not understand the material the teacher had diligently prepared. We found a tutor until the school realized the magnitude of the problem and moved one of the other teachers to teach that class. One can absolutely have a rough teacher, but if she is ready for the material, a tutor should help.

It’s hard to make giant changes in course in the middle of high school. I will say that I do wish I had advocated harder for my kids to NOT over schedule - not just academically. There was so much peer pressure to do it all, and I do think it was detrimental to their overall experience. Best of luck to her.

[MDparent22]

I too found that the experience was maybe better for one kid and not so great for the other, but honestly hindsight is 20/20 and there’s no crystal ball to see what the alternative path would have looked like. My youngest has struggled with health issues which made the stressful environment even more intense. But refused to switch to regular school - like OP, felt had too much invested in terms of work put into it and relationships already formed. So I get that. But I think there has to be a deal made or foot put down as a parent - which I did that if she stays, she will prioritize her health - that means doing the work but also not sacrificing the normal things in life - hang out with friends, sleep, catch a mindless tv show, join a club you enjoy and not for a resume. Then let the chips fall where they may in terms of grades and admission results. By senior year, neither kid even wanted an overly rigorous college so imagine the disappointment they’d feel if they didn’t even do the things they enjoyed for 4 years. One of mine considered giving up band after freshman year because it was not weighted and would lower their gpa relative to other kids. I told them my opinion and luckily they chose to stay the course because band provided more personal growth and maturity than 4 more AP classes ever could have.

Bottom line, no matter whether she stays or changes programs, the focus hopefully remains on how to get to the finish line while remaining healthy and happy in the process.

[momsearcheng]

I have 3 kids. 1 went magnets from elementary to HS, and got burned down at the end mentally. (GPA was fine and is in the middle of the pack in top program in college)
One was in magnet in MS and half HS (pulled during Covid due to remote study mess).
One went regular route with many DE in HS.
I would say the youngest one was happiest with the most balanced life and probably will be the most successful due to personality (was complaining as a kid that is not as gifted as siblings.)
All 3 are different, so it is hard to compare.
What we learned that colleges do not care from what school you are and it is harder to get to top programs from magnets.
That is simply because everyone from magnet apply to many same schools and college pick only one top student (no school will pull many from the same HS except local flagship.) That was repeated again and again for other younger kids of our friends.
Example. Oldest kid had more than half of magnet kids apply to UMich. Umich took 1 kid from the magnet and waitlisted the rest…
I would put your child where she is happy. Let her choose.
BTW many kids from youngest HS got accepted to very top colleges without any magnets.
Technically, it is easier to get to top college if you are the best student from a HS school. So you are better of at least competitive school, but I doubt that your daughter will be interested.
If I would have do over and have more money, I would avoid both magnets and public and would go private or homeschooling route.

[somethings]

@Bantamlove

how much to colleges care about/consider magnet schools that aren’t TJ?

I don’t think this question has a simple answer. From a research viewpoint, if you want anything better than speculation, you can try pooling data regarding a specific college/university, their applicants from the past several years, and the admission results.

I teach in a Texas public high school. It’s a magnet program (A) housed on a title 1 campus. The magnet curriculum is much more challenging than that of the host HS (B), on par with the three competitive HS (C, D, E) in the district, below a couple of charter schools (X, Y), and far below the cutthroat competitive private school in town (P).
I don’t have the actual data so can only go by personal knowledge. From my memory, in the past three graduating classes, P has the highest portion of students accepted to T20/30 universities (more than 10 out of a graduating class of 30), CDE each has 20-30 among 600 graduates, B has no more than 10 (almost all UT) among 600 graduates, and A has 5-8 among 80-90 graduates. The class of 2024 in A had 90 students, 7 accepted to UT and one Cornell (very first Ivy admission from this campus, ever). Again these are not accurate data, just based on what I hear from colleagues and friends. These numbers seem to support that magnet program A has higher T20/30 acceptance rate than even the competitive non-magnet CDE. The fact is since A is housed on the campus of B, students are ranked together. UT has auto admission for top 6%, most of which are students in A but ranked among all students in B. The point is, numbers don’t lie, but do need to be understood properly.

[VTMom03]

Speaking as a parent of a senior also at a non-TJ yet super competitive regional magnet school… Many parents and students have dreams of ivy League acceptances when they initially arrive. The reality doesn’t hit until maybe 11th grade, that for college admissions, the student is now compared against this ultra smart pool of kids, not compared against the normal range of achievement levels you might see in the home district high school. From solely a college admissions perspective, attending this school is a disadvantage for someone like my D25 who certainly would’ve been valedictorian at her rural high school. She’s worked super hard to get to probably around the median GPA/SAT at this magnet school. As a result, based on Naviance data, the likely admits for our in-state flagships like UVA/WM are now off the table or at best a much lower probability. It’s a bummer.

All that said, she’s gotten a great education, learned to deal with high stress environments (and “challenging” teachers) and learned to decouple her academic achievement from her self worth (although this is always a struggle). These are the things we’ve (rightly) learned to place value on. There were lessons for all of us the last 4 years.

The right decision for your daughter is out there; you as a parent have to help her make it. The decision shouldn’t be based on what her chances for college admissions are. Throw that out the window entirely. It should be based on where she’ll thrive emotionally, socially and academically right now. That’s the only criterion that matters.

[blossom]

Time for some tough love.

Not for your D- but for you, OP.

The world isn’t running out of calculus. The world isn’t running out of robust intellectual engagement and challenges. The world isn’t running out of rich academic experiences.

If your D has internalized that succeeding in this environment is her “ride or die” it is going to be hard to persuade her that she will likely be happier and more successful elsewhere. But there’s nothing you’ve written that sounds at all compelling about keeping her where she is.

I meet and work with a lot of “early stage career professionals” . Many of my colleagues (so my age and folks in their 50’s) have chewed over with me the stark differences between the current cohort and those from even ten years ago (not so long in historic terms). Some of these differences are admirable- their total comfort with technology, learning new and disruptive things, open-ness to other cultures, ability to challenge authority and ask why. Some of these differences are scary- much less ability to “self regulate” as early childhood educators describe challenging 4 year olds.

In the old days of working in an office, you’d see a junior employee still at her desk at 8 pm looking frustrated and exhausted and you could casually say “hey, get your coat, it’s quitting time” and during the elevator ride downstairs, kindly poke around and get a feel for why. And then figure out the right kind of support.

You can’t really do that on Zoom, or with limited time in the office. And for the super duper “I’ve been an over-achiever my entire life and I don’t know how to stop” personalities, it’s exceptionally challenging to figure out who is in over their head, and who is just tired because their college roommate had a birthday party the night before and they were up late.

But if your D is showing signs of not self-regulating (i.e. “I’m going to get a C on the next quiz and I’m OK with that because I need my sleep more than I need another two hours of studying”) then maybe it’s time for you to intervene more aggressively. If tutoring isn’t helping- and if this class is really bringing her down emotionally and socially- ask why this is so important right now.

The most intellectual kid I know from last year’s seniors is at Wittenberg. An almost peer in terms of academic curiosity and robust intellectual challenge is at SUNY Binghamton. His sibling- even more gifted- went to Holy Cross.

There are brilliant kids everywhere, helping to edit a professor’s book, working in labs, presenting at conferences. You can’t make your D’s HS experience all about college admissions!!!