<p>If you know someone who is facing bankruptcy in the next 1 to 2 years, and they don’t make any changes in their life, can you help them out of bankruptcy? i.e., if you give them a place to live for reduced rent or pay some bills, will that enable them to live without bankruptcy or simply push the bankruptcy down the road.</p>
<p>I’m thinking, without changes in spending habits or other lifestyle choices, that no amount of help will solve the issue. (We’re rulling out one time unexpected charges like a broken leg medical bill or something). I’m thinking that facing bankruptcy through a financially unsound lifestyle is sort of like chronic hoarding - you can clean out their house but they’ll just refill it that much faster.</p>
<p>A lot of bad behavior can be fixed and can be learned. While a place to live actually does help giving them the freedom to learn how to budget without the threat of eviction could make a real difference. </p>
<p>Things like budgeting, money management, investing, even discount shopping are not things that are easily taught.</p>
<p>Would think that in many cases, that sort of help could potentially backfire, as it is assuming and expecting major changes in personal habits. Something difficult under any circumstance. Reminds me of a friend who declared that this is the perfect time for her husband to quit smoking. But somehow he is not obeying orders to do so. </p>
<p>No matter how recommended, getting involved in expecting someone else to change a lifestyle behavior can lead to a lot of hard feelings and frustration. But maybe I’m too negative?</p>
<p>The bancruptcies in my circle of acquaintance were merely delayed by the efforts of friends and family members to help those in financial straits. Had no one stepped in, the bankruptcies would have been filed sooner, and the friends and family would not have been exhausted emotionally (and in some cases financially). It is hard to be the one holding a tough-love stance, but that is the stance you need to take.</p>
<p>It has been difficult to watch these people I care about head willfully into financial chaos. However none of them were willing to do the things necessary to make their lives work until they truly had hit bottom.</p>
<p>“I’m thinking, without changes in spending habits or other lifestyle choices, that no amount of help will solve the issue.”</p>
<p>I’m thinking what you’re thinking. And I think we’re both right.
I’ve made the mistake of trying to “help” friends change. Trust me, your friend will not be grateful for this “help.” </p>
<p>You’re probably in a position to “help” due to your wise spending habits, frugal lifestyle, etc.
That’s your reward. Don’t waste your $ on someone who has already proven that he won’t use it wisely.
Do you want to take your $ (or time) and flush it? I didn’t think so.</p>