Can you help me with my Harvard essay?

<p>On the Harvard supplement it says that if we wish we may choose to write an additional essay. I decided to write an essay on the prompt asking for the most meaningful academic experience to me(class, project, program, paper, etc.). Will you please tell me if this essay will work and if there are any mistakes/awkward sentences in it. Thank you for your help!</p>

<p>It was the beginning of my junior year. I had been warned about the class by several students, but I had never quite gotten the hint. As I walked into the classroom and found a seat, the realization of the mess I had gotten myself into finally hit me. I was in the dreaded Humanities class—the hardest class in the school. For the next year, I would have to survive four teachers (one for history, art, literature, and music), hours upon hours of homework, projects, papers, presentations, and enrichment. Enrichment was the defining feature of the class. It entailed attending plays, watching movies, making projects, and pretty much anything else one can think to do to “enrich” his or herself outside of class. I was in for a rough year.
As the first few weeks of class went by, I learned that the class was just as hard as I had been told it would be. I had never been in a situation like that before. I found myself staying up past midnight doing homework each night and never having any time for myself. I started to complain constantly and dread each day of school. When midterms came out and I learned I was at a “D” in the class, I was appalled. I knew that something had to change or I would end up failing the class. I decided to change my attitude.
For the rest of the grading period, I entered class each day with an open mind. I decided to make every day an opportunity to learn more about the world and myself. This change in attitude made all the difference in the world. I became excited about the material being taught. It fascinated me to see how art, music, history, and literature are all intertwined, and how each one influences and is influenced by the others. Homework became more bearable because I enjoyed what I was learning. Enrichment became not a required labor but a chance to explore topics that I was interested in and to individualize my studies. Humanities taught me more than just the subject material. It taught me time management and organization. My sleepless nights disappeared as I learned to use my time wisely. By the end of the grading period, my dismal “D” had turned into an astonishing “A.”
Humanities has been the most worthwhile class I have taken during my entire high school career. Yes, it was hard. However, it taught me to tackle my challenges instead of letting them control me. I look at all of my classes differently now. I try to relate the subjects to myself and find ways to enjoy what I am being taught. I explore the material I am learning instead of just memorizing facts and trying to understand basic concepts. I try to find relationships from other subjects and try to understand the influences surrounding a certain event. Above all, Humanities has taught me that I can make anything I do worthwhile just by a simple change in attitude.</p>


<p>First, congratulations on turning a D into an A. That's quite an achievement. But reading your essay, I don't quite understand how you did it. You talk about a change of attitude. But when you were earning the D, you were working hard, staying past midnight. Yet, eventually, your were able to cut down on time spent on homework by using better time management. So is it "attitude" alone? What do you mean by this, exactly?</p>

<p>Your introduction suggests an ambivalence: the dreaded Humanities class which you chose to take (nobody forced you, right?); your worked hard, but you were complaining constantly. </p>

<p>Then suddenly, you develop an open mind, your became excited by the materials, your enjoyed learning. What brought that on? It could not just be the D? I'd like to read more about it. There is one grammatical mistake : >>and pretty much anything else one can think to do to “enrich” his or herself outside of class>> Change his to him, or better, change his or herself to oneself. </p>

<p>Hope this helps.</p>

<p>Thanks for your help. I just finished writing this tonight so I haven't really had a chance to make sure it is conveying the message I want it to convey. The people on the Harvard forum are really nasty and are calling me a liar and stuff. Anyway, I explain more about the class in my responses to them. If you have any suggestions about how to incorporate some of that stuff it would be appreciated. If it is unrepairable, I guess I'll just scrap it. Thanks again.</p>