Hey! So basically I can’t afford to go home for Thanksgiving break which ends the day before my birthday (It’s on the 27th), and that’s usually when my family celebrates my birthday as a whole. A huge thing that I’ve been struggling with is the not being able to go home, I’m really like depressed already so like adding this on top of it’s really harshing my vibe. I’m a transfer student at a new school as well so I don’t really know anyone so I’m just kind of out of luck for celebrating my birthday this year and I’m like finally turning 20 and I don’t know, I just feel really let down. Any advice?
There’s no way you can ask for bus fare/airfare/ whatever as a birthday present from mom and dad?
You knew this when you applied-- what was your plan then?
If there’s no way to make it happen, speak to your RA. Make this about Thanksgiving, not your birthday. Ask how to get in touch with other who will be on campus for Thanksgiving-- what do they usually do? Find a group and make plans-- is there a restaurant in town that everyone can go to?
If you actually end up by yourself, make plans to make it a YOU day. Watch the parade, watch football, write out Christmas cards, do a spa treatment, go Black Friday shopping (brick and mortar or online). Volunteer at a soup kitchen.
But start now to make plans.
Yes, there should be other students on campus at Thanksgiving. My high school boyfriend went off to MIT and couldn’t come home. Two Thanksgivings in a row, I flew up there to visit him. One of the faculty members invited a bunch of students to his house for Thanksgiving dinner. I still remember how nice that was!
Ask of there’s money for you to go home as a birthday present. Have you talked with our parents about it? Have they told you it’s totally impossible?
If theres no way foe you to go home…Make it about Thanksgiving. At most schools students will “take home” classmates who’d otherwise be alone on Thanksgiving. It’d be unthinkable among all the kids I know to just leave someone alone in the dorms for the Holiday.
If you feel terrible, go see someone at the counseling center. It’s their job to help you. You may not feel much better but at least you’ll have ideas about what to do about it and you won’t feel so alone.
A couple of other comments:
–You might want to talk to someone at the school counseling center if you are feeling depressed.
–Make plans to celebrate your birthday with family when you are home for semester break a few weeks later.
–Join some campus clubs of interest to you and that can be a way to meet people.
My dd was across the country for Thanksgiving and couldn’t come home because of her school schedule.
She only gave her off on the Wednesday afternoon and Thursday because she had a group study on the Friday following Thanksgiving.
I got a local restaurant to deliver a Thanksgiving dinner to her and it turns out, some kids in her dorm were staying in. She had more than enough food, so she shared it with her housebound dorm mates.
At my son’s school, the staff made a thanksgiving dinner for each house (dorm).
At my DD2’s school, they rotated flyers to ask about people staying on campus for Thanksgiving so they could plan the numbers for Thanksgiving dinner. They put all of the tables together at the Commons and did some icebreaker activities and games.
Please ask your RA or Social Activities center.
This is a part of going away to college, there are always trade offs especially when you have a tight budget. Sometimes there are clubs or organizations that have Thanksgiving events for out of town students who stay on campus. The band director at my daughter’s school hosts out of town band members who don’t leave campus every Thanksgiving. You can also have a mini birthday celebration on Skype. My daughter has opened her presents while on Skype on her birthday. We sing, we celebrate how we can. You can too.
My daughter doesn’t come home for Thanksgiving. She could go to her boyfriend’s house but doesn’t like the hassle of flying from Florida to NJ on that weekend. It’s bad. Last year she and a friend went to Universal for the day and then they went to the factory outlets for shopping at 3 am.
Her birthday is during finals week. It’s just a day. You’ll find another time to celebrate.
I once was in the same situation, but for Christmas. I found three others in the same situation and we actually had quite a nice Christmas on our own. You might want to find if there are other students in the same situation as you for thanksgiving. If there are any students who are not from the US then they are likely to be unable to go home for thanksgiving.