Cat Lovers Thread - 2024

2023 version was closed, so starting a new one. (Please move if I missed a new version)

For all you cat lovers, I’d appreciate advice. Our dear urchin is nearing 20. We know the time to say goodbye is coming soon. Such a hard decision to best determine “when”, so appreciate all the guidance from those who have been there.

Previously, all our prior pets quit eating, giving us some type of sign. Not the case (yet) with urchin.

Vet is great, but will not be the one to tell us, and rightfully it is our decision to make. At urchin’s last visit a few months ago, vet said he still looked good for his age, albeit with arthritis, slowly advancing kidney disease and hypertension (taking meds for all).

Vet advised to watch for vomiting, lack of grooming, seizures, or other major changes. We have not seen any of those. He still eats, drinks, and uses the litterbox, but less so every day. He hasn’t “played” for a long time, doesn’t enjoy his prior, or really any activities, and is definitely retreating in phases.

First, he claimed a remote spot in our living room. After about 4 days, he decided to join us again, and back to his prior (albeit slower) self. Then he found a spot under a desk. Stayed for about 4 days but occasionally came to visit. He has now moved to a spot under a bed. He has been there about 3 days and leaves only to eat, drink, use the litter box, and a very rare hello.

I don’t want him in pain, but cats are notorious for hiding that. He has no other known major medical issues other than above, but obviously his “quality of life” has taken a negative path. It breaks my heart, but is that enough to say goodbye? He has improved in the past, so we don’t want to be hasty either. Or, do we wait until we see more of the above signs?

AAUUGG. The absolute worst part of loving a pet!

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Started reading this and had to stop half way. :mending_heart::mending_heart::mending_heart: I’ll return later. We are having our own kitty concerns. :smiling_face_with_tear:

Thinking of you. :mending_heart::mending_heart:

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I felt like a sign from our cat was a growing tumor and then stopped eating and could not walk. Hid in the basement.

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I think only you can really make that decision. My advice is when you make it, do not let anyone (including yourself) make you feel guilty. He has been loved for almost 20 years. I believe the average age of a stray cat is about 3. He’s had a fantastic life! It will be hard to let him go at any time.

Some of our pets have been somewhat more obvious - couldn’t walk, wouldn’t eat or move. One had cancer and got so skinny, though she was starving all of the time. When she would chew through the plastic bag of cheese on a counter to get more food, we knew it was time. But one cat didn’t show many signs, and she died at home while we were trying to rush her to the vet to have her put to sleep. That was by far the worst thing I’ve experienced. I do not want to get to that point again.

Many hugs to you. 20 years old is amazing! Our tend to only make it to 15-17.

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One of my kitties is on palliative care. Cancer. I decided against aggressive treatments because her case looked pretty advanced. The vet and my vet relatives agreed.

I think the chart in this link is pretty helpful.

My cat is still hanging in there (but I keep crying…. :cry: it was such a sudden onset, and there is nothing we could have done to prevent it, but I am still very heartbroken).

Hugs to all kitty lovers who have to go through this.

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The above statement says a lot (I hope I did the quote correctly). His quality of life does not sound good, and it may be time.

We had to make that tough decision several months ago. The vet wouldn’t advise us either, but once we made the decision she agreed it was the right decision.

We also experienced a cat dying the same morning we had an appointment to euthanize him. It was pretty traumatic. He had been retreating farther and farther away like your kitty, and was mostly living under a bed before he went.

Hugs to you. It is a very tough decision to make, and only you can decide when you’re ready.

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All I know for sure is this post brought me to tears.

I’ve had to say goodbye to more pets than I care to remember. It’s not an easy decision and one not taken lightly. Be as gentle with yourself as you are with “urchin”

Sending gentle scritches to him and a soft hug to you.

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I just went through this with my cat of a lifetime. He was 17, and with end stage kidney disease. I was balanced on that knife edge of “how does he look this morning? Did he eat? Is today the day?” for 4 months. You are right, this is the absolute worst thing about having a pet!!!

I used a veterinarian who comes to your house to euthanize, and it was extremely helpful to have a conversation with her before deciding. In my case, I waited until he had pretty much stopped eating, which was a clear benchmark.

Hugs to you. It really is awful. (I guess the death of a beloved pet is awful no matter what the circumstances; just different degrees of awfulness.)

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I’ve just read this last post. Not the entire OP or follow up, so apologies if this is a repeat.

If your vet will not do in-home euthanasia (ours would not for our last pet goodbye), ask about sedatives or other meds that can be administered at home. Our last kitty was already on twice daily sub-q IVs so the vet gave us a strong sedative to give her at home. She never knew she left her safe bed, favorite toys and favorite people. We drove her to the vet once we’d said our goodbyes at home.

It was still difficult for us, but we were grateful her last memories weren’t at the vet (which she hated).

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Fyi there are veterinarians whose practice is solely at home euthanasia. There’s a chain called “Lap of Love”; in my area, there are at least 2 other vets that also only do home euthanasia. Not at all mentioning this for your situation @DramaMama2021 , but for people who may be stuck. Your solution sounds like a good one too.

My cat was on daily subq fluids also – twice a day is dedication. Hats off to you.

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I have a list of home euthanasia vets in the greater Seattle area provided by my vet, so can share by PM with anyone who needs it.

I’m sorry you are dealing with this. We also have a senior cat - Lucky is 19.
As others have said, only you can make the decision, but the goal should be to not wait too long. I think most of us do. We hang on for ourselves really. I would say that if your cat is hiding that frequently he is in pain. You want to have your last moments with him be on your terms - not an emergency situation, which is usually how it ends when we wait too long.

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Had a conversation with Mr. about end of life options for our cancer patient kitty. He insisted on letting her “die peacefully” at home. :angry: There is nothing “peaceful” about a pet’s “natural” death… sounds like he completely forgot about our experience with the last cat. Ugh. I’m still traumatized by that. So keeping an eye on the cat, watching for signs that the time has come. :cry::cry::cry: I’ll try to arrange a home euthanasia, but if that doesn’t work, she is going to the clinic. :cry::cry:

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I am so sorry for you and your urchin. I went through this in December, slowly declining much-loved cat with kidney disease. We made the sad decision when he stopped eating (he hated the “kidney diet” food but at the end didn’t even want Fancy Feast.) We felt like he might have gone on for a few more days, but our dear vet confirmed that he wasn’t getting better. I worried that it was too soon, but in retrospect, no, I’m glad he didn’t suffer one more day.

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There is nothing worse than the mindset of letting an animal die a “natural” death. It is most likely going to be prolonged and torturous.

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I know! :cry::cry::100:

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Another vote for being a bit early rather than late. I had a favorite pet have a major seizure and pass in my arms en route to the vet. Very traumatic.

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I’m so sorry.

Oh my. Now I noticed that the oldest cat of the “colony” (15 1/2) has a somewhat hazy eye. Looks like a cataract… off to the vet we will go next week. This cranky old lady has used at least 5 of her 9 lives, but every time she pulls through… I think all because of her strong drive to eat no matter what!

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Ugh, I am so sorry for all of you.

In the last year I adopted a 4 year old male stray (now 5) after not having cats for years. I love him so much, but weirdly in the back of my mind I have this very question. I had to do it for the cat I had in my single years, and it was very hard (she was 12, which seems young now but she was having problems and back then that was old age for a cat).

I believe it’s the ultimate kindness, and last act of compassion and love, to make that decision. I’ve heard the saying better a day too early than a minute too late. That is trite, but it might help you weigh your choices.

:mending_heart:

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