Many schools give merit or have need aid. OP has to run the net price calculator.
But if they give $40K and not saying they would, Tuition, room and board alone are $83K. So that’d leave $43K plus books, transport and more - where is the money coming if not saved up or can’t be cash flowed?
As you can only get $65K in Parent Plus loans over four years and $20K in one year, it’s not feasible. Even that is too much in loans.
OP has to do a lot of financial planning before they can even pick a school list.
OP, with the stats, can go South with auto merit for $20K all in - but OP is Muslim and there are Muslim’s in the south but that would be a choice as I understand on paper there might be discomfort. There may be lower cost (but not as low) in the NE too but perhaps in rural places - like New Hampshire, etc.
But in the end, no matter where OP chooses to go, there has to be an affordability component - that’s just life. And needs to be planned for, if it isn’t by the parents. It sounds like they think - just borrow - and that’s one thing the current administration has gotten right, they’re limiting that ability - protecting both the kids and lenders who get defaulted on.