Hello @cjdskokiee24
Your siblings, parents and personal advisors have given you terrible advice.
An admission to a school that is not a financially feasible option for your family is still a rejection, Your current list does not have any financially feasible options.
With a 45k income Op will be eligible for the NYS Opportunity programs (SEEK, EOP, HEOP).
You need to build a list from the bottoms up starting with CUNY (toss an application to Macaulay Honors). Participate in October free application week, when NYCPS students can apply to CUNY for free. She will definitely get in to City College and the other 4-Year schools; Queens, Brooklyn , Hunter. They will also be financial safeties after TAP & PELL.
Get your SUNY applications together now as you will be able to be admitted direct admission . Again, SUNY free appplication week is in October for all NYCPS students. Right there you have 13 schools, where you will be eligible for TAP/PELL, perhaps even some honors programming but will come in affordable. You may be eligible for EOP at Stonybrook, Bing, Albany, & UB. But again they will be financially feasible options
With a family income of $45k, you should definitely be tossing an application into some of the amazing HEOP programs in NYS; Columbia, Barnard, Cornell, NYU/NYU Poly, U of R, Rensselaer, Hamilton, Colgate, Marist, Syracuse, etc. (Use your 20 College board fee waivers to apply, send your test scores and do the CSS profile).
As others have stated, you should be tossing an application at Questbridges (application is now open) and the Gates Scholarship.
Toss an application to Emory Leadsa (application deadline is approaching)
Hope this helps