chance my ucla appeal

Transfer Students UC Transfers
1

<p>I know its a long shot but i think it was worth it. im a poli sci major with a major gpa of 3.8 and an overall of 3.38, will be igetc certified after spring and have completed all preparatory requirements for my major. </p>

<p>After I applied i was hired by a CA state assemblyman to be their field representative, usually an entry level job for poli sci majors who have already graduated.</p>

<p>i have to letters of rec, one from the state assemblyman, and one from the poli sci department chair at my college. obviously my boss gave me a great rec, but my prof said i was the best student he had ever had. </p>

<p>what do you all think? </p>

<p>Dear Committee Members:</p>

<p>I recently received notification from your university informing me that I have been denied admission for Fall 2009 due to the highly competitive admissions process. However, I believe that I should be admitted for the following reasons:</p>

<p>• Shortly after sending in my application, I was offered an opportunity that few receive. California State Assemblyman X chose me to be his Field Representative that serves the constituents in his district. I am one of the youngest people to work for the California State Legislature. I earned this position, despite a strong field of candidates, because of my strong work ethic and keen understanding of the political system. This opportunity has strengthened the foundation of my future aspirations, and the first hand experiences I’ve had in political arena will contribute to the classroom discourse at your university.
• I have completed all of the preparatory requirements for the political science major with exemplary grades and will complete IGETC by the spring semester prior to transferring. I currently have a major GPA of 3.8, with an overall GPA of 3.38, and will have 102.5 transferable quarter units completed prior to transferring. My overall GPA is not the best indicator of what kind of student I would be. My major GPA is critical because it shows that I perform strong in curriculum pertaining to my field of study. And my field of study makes up most of my remaining course work.</p>

<p>I respectfully request that you review my application and transcripts in light of the above information, and reconsider my request for admission. </p>

<p>My determination and willpower to enter the political arena has allowed me to meet many major political leaders. At such a young age, my persistence at being a participant has rewarded me with such special encounters. But all of that does not matter unless I earn my stripes. I can work on all the campaigns, and attend all the rallies and conventions, but unless you have an appreciation of those achievements, they will not be meaningful. I will contribute to your university a new and strong perspective of how politics is practiced in the frontlines by discussing with peers in the classroom. I ask you to give me an opportunity to attend your university so that I can apply the lessons I have learned in the arena to those who haven’t.</p>

<p>If you have any questions or need further information, please contact me at (xxx) xxx-xxxx, or email me at <a href="mailto:x@x.com">x@x.com</a>.</p>

<p>Thank you for your consideration in this matter.</p>

2

<p>I have read a lot of appeals, I’m the go-to person when my friends need basic correcting and leading them in the right direction. As far as appealing goes, what the reviewers are basically looking for new, unknown information. They also like to see letters of recommendations from people (professors, colleagues, advisors, counselors) who know where you want to go, how dedicated you are to your prospective field…in that aspect I think you did great with your letters! </p>

<p>I can’t say that that will be enough for the appeal committee because I’m sure more people will be appealing based on personal reasons (who knows if they sway towards them more than the actual work…!) but it’s worth a shot!</p>

<p>Btw…</p>

<p>You didn’t turn this in already, did you? It needs to be formatted correctly. </p>

<p>Whatever happens, good luck to you!</p>

3

<p>I have completed all of the preparatory requirements for the political science major with exemplary grades and will complete IGETC by the spring semester prior to transferring. I currently have a major GPA of 3.8, with an overall GPA of 3.38, and will have 102.5 transferable quarter units completed prior to transferring. My overall GPA is not the best indicator of what kind of student I would be. My major GPA is critical because it shows that I perform strong in curriculum pertaining to my field of study. And my field of study makes up most of my remaining course work.</p>

<p>^ you dont really need to include this… they already know.</p>

<p>but i think you should go more in detail about the first part…</p>

4

<p>I havent turned it in yet, what formatting problem. also the last post, I think that the letters of rec will explain why it is important,</p>

5

<p>I agree with allisonn, that paragraph (perhaps except for the last sentence and that’s a maybe) doesn’t need to be there. They know that already.</p>

<p>Bullets? Not needed, it’s not a list, it’s a formal letter. </p>

<p>I suggest you take it to your counselor or to an English professor.</p>

6

<p>expand on the first part. the second part, like everybody already said, isnt new.</p>

7

<p>“I earned this position, despite a strong field of candidates,”</p>

<p>reword that.</p>

<hr>

<p>“This opportunity has strengthened the foundation of my future aspirations,”</p>

<p>should be … FOR my future aspirations… </p>

<hr>

<p>"and the first hand experiences I’ve had in political arena will contribute to the classroom discourse at your university. "</p>

<p>… and the first hand experiences I have (don’t ever use contractions in formal statements) endured in the political arena will surely allow me to contribute to the campus in an authentic and beneficial fashion. </p>

<hr>

<p>“and will complete IGETC by the spring semester prior to transferring.”</p>

<ul>
<li>and will have completed the IGETC by the end of Spring '09.</li>
</ul>

<hr>

<p>“My overall GPA is not the best indicator of what kind of student I would be. My major GPA is critical because it shows that I perform strong in curriculum pertaining to my field of study. And my field of study makes up most of my remaining course work.”</p>

<ul>
<li>I strongly believe that my cumulative GPA is not an accurate indication of my anticipated performance at UCLA. My academic interests are dominantly centered around political science. – (explain how your attention was focused on extra curricular poli/sci stuff, and how you DEFINITELY were doing a LOT of reading about the subject outside of school… trying to be active in every way possible) – As the majority of my remaining course work will be dominantly upper division, striving toward a bachelors of science in political science, I feel wholly confident – and so should you – that I will perform consistently at a level of academic excellence mirroring that upon which UCLA prides itself. </li>
</ul>

<hr>

<p>“My determination and willpower to enter the political arena has allowed me to meet many major political leaders. At such a young age, my persistence at being a participant has rewarded me with such special encounters. But all of that does not matter unless I earn my stripes. I can work on all the campaigns, and attend all the rallies and conventions, but unless you have an appreciation of those achievements, they will not be meaningful. I will contribute to your university a new and strong perspective of how politics is practiced in the frontlines by discussing with peers in the classroom. I ask you to give me an opportunity to attend your university so that I can apply the lessons I have learned in the arena to those who haven’t.”</p>

<p>Realizing my passion at an early age, my determination to penetrate the political spectrum has led me to shake hands with a number of political players, and my persistence has opened many doors. However, there remains what in my eyes is an absolutely necessary step to my success: my formal education. ---- at this point, you’ve already sold yourself… try to stray from the idea that you’ve got a lot to offer to the university… you’ve made that point… instead, talk about what UCLA, SPECIFICALLY, can do for you… talk about a professor whose lectures you’ve listened to… or whose work you’ve read… or talk about political opportunities in LA… how LA is the political epicenter of the western half of the united states… get them to realize that you need UCLA in order to best actualize your potential… if you don’t make that point, you don’t have a shot… </p>

<p>hope that helped.
i also really hope you use my corrections.
i may be two beers deep in anticipation of the upcoming laker game, but reading over this… it looks pretty convincing. </p>

<p>good luck.</p>