<p>I’m currently in the process of applying to college and I’d like some feedback on my essay for the University of Washington.</p>
<p>Tell us a story from your life, describing an experience that either demonstrates your character or helped to shape it. </p>
<pre><code>Homecoming is a time of jubilation, great vibes and school spirit; for most people. Throughout my 11 years of education, I hadn’t had a single blemish on my disciplinary record. That all changed the night of homecoming of my junior. I chose to succumb to the temptation of drinking alcohol before the dance to ‘have a good time.’ Was this necessary? No way. And yet, I did it anyway, thinking, nothing will go wrong; except everything did. My whole group was pulled into the security office as we were exiting the dance. A student or administrator had noticed one of my group member’s ‘suspicious’ activity and reported us. All of my group was brought into the main office. Then, we were each brought into separate rooms to be questioned and punished. Alone in a room, I heard a knock on the door and saw my parents walk in with the Dean of Students. I broke down, seeing the look of disappointment and dismay on my mother and father. I was at a loss of words, no one was to blame except for ourselves. In hindsight, I can see the decision was a mistake; how could I be so ignorant?
Now, you may ask, why are you writing your college essay about getting drunk at a school dance? It was the occurrences following my humiliating blunder that helped develop and shape the person I am today. In wake of the event, I had a lot of time to myself. I gave myself two options to view this event: declare everything as unfair, and continue to ask the question, why me? Or, do I use this as a wake-up call to get my life together and focus on my studies and athletics. I chose the latter, diverting from the path of self-pity, and began the uphill journey to make up for my stupendous blunder. I had to take steps in the right direction to erase this event from my conscious.
Step one, serve my probation from sports for breaking the athletic code. I had to pick a winter sport that was non-cut in order to be eligible for soccer in the spring. I selected swim and dive, not because I was Michael Phelps or anything, but because it was the only non-cut sport for that particular athletic season. To avoid the embarrassment of trying to swim, I decided to give dive a shot. I gave it my all and qualified for districts and received a varsity letter, even though I had never done a trick off a diving board in my life. As a reward for my hard-work throughout the season, I was awarded the honor of becoming a captain for my senior season. Step two, dedicate more time toward my academics. I had always set myself to a high standard of performance in school but there was always room for improvement. I was able to achieve a 4.0 GPA for my junior year despite being enrolled in more rigorous classes than I had previously had in the first two years of high school. Step three, commit to sobriety and avoid outside distractions. It has been about a year since the incident and I am proud to say I have abstained from alcohol since then. A person with strong character shows drive, energy, determination, self-discipline, willpower, and nerve. I exhibited all of those traits in the handling of the Homecoming debacle; committing to academics, determined to succeed in sports, and staying honest to myself, admitting I made a mistake and I needed to make a change.
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