Choate, Lawrenceville, Blair - questions from parent of applicant for 9th grade

[skieurope]

I can’t speak for Choate, but retake for better grades is extremely uncommon in the BS world - as well it should be

[IndySceptic]

@TryandThrive

Since my other kids went to day schools, we were attending plays, organizing sports boosters, go to talks at the school, help out the admissions team etc. I understand that not all of that would be possible at boarding schools, but it would be nice to get to know the community a little bit, especially since we are planning to be at a bunch of the games.

Outside of the booster thing, I don’t see any of those being problematic. Boarding schools I’m familiar with welcome you attending events at the school and also recommend events for non-local parents outside of the school.

Our kid went to an Independent School from PK-8 with a very strong sense of community. I’d caution you to manage your expectations, because its not like that at Boarding Schools. Example: Our Independent School’s Board of Trustees was mostly parents and lots of schools events and fundraisers relied heavily on parental involvement. That ain’t happening, at least not at the places I’m familiar with. Nor should it, really; which is what I think @Publisher was implying.

It’s different from Day schools. For a reason. I could be wrong, but I don’t expect to develop strong friendships with other parents at my kid’s school outside of those I already knew and my kid’s roommate’s parents. I’m certain my parents didn’t develop any when I went.

[Teahupo]

In 2022, there was an an unfortunate incident at Lawrenceville involving bullying and a student suicide.

In my opinion, Lawrenceville’s Head of School Stephen Murray has done extremely well when it comes to improving mental well being and relieving academic pressure at the school. Watch L10 (L’ville’s News Channel) on You Tube for examples of activities that boost camaraderie and school spirit Overall, I would rate Murray among the best, if not the best, when it comes to prep school leadership.

In terms of football, L’ville football is very much on the upswing. It’s a shame L’ville isn’t in NEPSAC and thus ineligble to compete in NEPSAC post season bowl games. Although recently it has added more games with NEPSAC schools like Hotchkiss, Taft and Kent. Lawrenceville has been playing Choate annually in football since 1932.

[SchoolINeed]

I’m pretty sure that there were multiple instances of S****** Harassment at Choate from the late 1900s to the early 2000s, but the school has taken care of those.

[gardenstategal]

You’ll meet parents at games, and you can always take your child - and his friends- out for a meal when you come to visit, game or otherwise.

There were a couple of parents who became “friendly acquaintances “ from this kind of interaction, but overall, this wasn’t a forum designed for parents to create their own community. While we always enjoyed seeing those folks, we haven’t seen most of them since graduation. But the school had events, whether a cocktail event at Parents Weekend, or volunteer opportunities (arranging flowers for graduation, fundraising, a teacher appreciation luncheon, etc.) to help people connect enough to not feel awkward.

Coming from the environment you describe (where your kids’ activities have been a catalyst for adult community), you should probably expect for this social hole to be filled by something other than the BS. This can be a hard adjustment because many of your current friends will stay connected through their kids, and as you move to the fringes of that, you’ll also be dealing with a kid living away from home. Just sayin’!! It can be tough.

Will also add, it will also depend on how much your kid wants you involved with HIS community. Our kid wanted BS friends to be more his thing, so after having been the house where everyone came all the time, it felt very quiet.

[ridleyroo]

@TryandThrive

We are interested to be involved with the school and would like to go to games etc. What is your experience with the parent community at those boarding schools? What distinguishes their vibe, for example during athletic competition? Which school would you say has the most spirit?

My DD loved Blair but ended up choosing their rival school, so while I can’t speak to the Blair experience specifically, the Blair/Peddie rivalry is robust and creates a great deal of fun and community for both campuses. Local parents go the games which take place over a fall weekend and alternate campuses each year. Peddie parents travel to Blair and vice versa. You can check out the IG accounts of both schools to get a sense of the vibe… the schools go all out! They are some of my favorite posts. You will also have the option to volunteer on campus for the festivities if you want. While Peddie has won the cup for the past couple of years, Blair’s football is much stronger than Peddie so I’m sure it’s a fun game to watch on the Blair side if your kiddo is on the team. My DD, who has no athletic stake in the school, loves Blair week (which is called Peddie week if you’re a Blair student) because of all the Pep and excitement leading up to it and I suspect there is equal Pep on the Blair side. I don’t know if the other schools on your list have similar rivals, but a good rivalry makes for really strong school spirit!