@Dankadon Dittos on BONFIRE… We bundled all the letters, literature, brochures, etc and used as kindling for his graduation party bonfire. It was amazingly therapeutic!
@MTMOM16 What was your D’s original decision from BW for MT? I was just wondering if he was originally redirected to the BA program before receiving the audition for BFA program.
@MTMom98 D originally audition for MT and was rejected. Just got this letter the other day inviting her to the new BFA Acting. She’s resolute that MT is where she wants to be though so no to BW.
Just wondering how everyone is doing. Move-in is literally around the corner. My D is so excited. She can’t wait to begin her college experience! I must say I am excited for her as well. Even though I know my tears are coming. LOL!
We are excited but sad. The closer it gets the more tears there are. I know my daughter will do fine. It is just a big move a long way from home. She has been a bit sad too which I wasn’t expecting given how much she is looking forward to her new school.
Such a transition for all. Good luck everyone. Will be thinking of all the kids the next few weeks
My D has transitioned from being really excited to having “holy crap” moments. I’m nervous that she’ll be so far away but I’m really looking forward to seeing her grow. I’m very grateful for Facetime and Skype - it will certainly close the distance! We’re having her think in time chunks when she starts to panic (6-7 weeks to family weekend, then 7 to Thanksgiving, then 4 to winter break). She’s got this.
I know this is a personal thing- but did anyone set limits on how far away they could go? I really don’t want to do plane tickets for every trip. Am I being unreasonable if I set a 6 hour (ish) radius? We are in the east- so that limit would leave us with a lot of options.
@Sammy8028 - That is EXACTLY the radius we used when my daughter put together her list. 6-7 hours - with a few exceptions because of family in the area, or really inexpensive tuition that would mean more budget for travel. She ended up at a school 3 hours from us. At first, she thought that was “too close” - but she will tell you now that she’s grateful that it’s easy for us to come to her performances… and that it’s far enough away that we don’t “pop” in.
We did not set limits, partly because I didn’t want my son feeling any “what ifs” about the process. “What if I’d applied to that wonderful school but my parents wouldn’t let me?” But we certainly looked harder at schools closer to home. In the end, the majority of the schools my son applied to were within a 6-hr radius, but there were a handful that would have required a plane trip. He did, in fact, get in to all of those schools, but the necessity for taking a plane every vacation (or every time we wanted to see him in a show) certainly factored in to his final decision not to attend one of those faraway places.
Move in for me is in three weeks and it’s pretty scary and exciting. I’m just glad to be done with high school and applying to school.
@Sammy8028 A lot of parents and their kids have limits of how far they want to travel for college. This is a college topic not exclusive to theatre majors. When using those match search systems you can usually specificity a region. Some schools out of state were still quite affordable with really good aid so it balanced out airplane tickets compared to some more expensive schools that were a long drive away. For me it turned out I got a school I can drive to while also having an affordable tuition so best of both worlds. You are definitely not unreasonable and I recall many posters on these forms have specified they are looking for schools within a certain hours away from an area.
We didn’t set a limit on distance - but did discuss and agree on restrictions of geographic areas. Some were D’s idea she was not interested in schools in the south. And some were mine- I wanted her to stay east of the Mississippi River. In the end- she had some schools that would have probably required flying (a 12-14 hour drive away) but they still didn’t feel “too” far too me.
As we head across the country to move our daughter into school, I sure wish I had put restrictions on distance! LOL.
Unfortunately none of the programs she was interested in are remotely near our state. So far away it is. Thank goodness for planes!
We live on Long Island and my suggestion was driving 5 to 7 hours driving distance max. But both girls were looking at proximity to big cities anyway. So we looked in upstate NY, the Boston area, down to DC and west into PA. That covered quite a bit of ground, and both girls ended up at NYU anyway.
Didn’t set any limits on distance. We live on the east coast and that is pretty much where she wanted to stay. I was the one who wanted her to check out Chicago and more southern states but she was not interested. Even though the schools she wanted weren’t that far we always had a discussion about cost of living and how that would factor in the ultimate cost of the school. The school she ultimately chose is about two hours away and it does make it easier for her travel to and from school. And it makes it more accessible for us to see her in shows.
We didn’t set distances, but I was hoping for a driving distance of 8 hours and under. D is 7 hours, 15 minutes away without stops. It’s a bit long, but do-able. It helps that neither my H nor I mind driving.
Close proximity to an airport was important to us with any school over 5 hours.
I set no limits on distance…the only BFA my daughter got into was 10 minutes from home. She chose to go to school 3,000 away to be close to NYC. Thank goodness there are nonstop flights from LAX to EWR!
I didn’t “technically” set distance limits … but we’re located right outside of Chicago which puts LOTS of schools into what I consider a driveable distance of 8-10 hours.
Farthest was 9 hours - Western Carolina.
Closest was 2 hours - Western Michigan.
She ended up attending Nebraska Wesleyan - 8 hours away.
Well for what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure my Pacific Northwest coast kids (both of whom have TSA Precheck and that helps) could fly door to door from our city to Boston or NYC respectively, land, neither checking luggage because you get the need not to and who would then hop on a subway for under $3 to get themselves to their respective colleges a lot faster than many of you folks within driving distance of some of these great Northeast schools. And this means even if you live in the northeast AND in the same state of said school which means faster than you could navigate traffic and parking. Ready, set, go.
PS this is all bravado. I know I’m right about the challenge but I’d have given anything to have been able to drive. It’s a good goal and it’s not about the hours. It’s about the ability. When your kid gets mono freshman year and feels like they are dying and you wish you could jump in the car and bring them soup… you can if you live within a 6-7 hour drive and still get back for work the next day if you so choose. If that same drive would take you 3 days, not so much. Had you all going for a moment there didn’t I?
Haflokum brings up a good point. When my D suddenly got pneumonia and was hospitalized for close to a week a month into her freshman year, it was nice to be able to hop in the car and head there as soon as we got the call that she was going to the hospital. She’d been in the hospital for hours by the time we got there, but we didn’t have to wait for a flight or have an overly long drive (although it, of course, felt overly long because of our anxiousness.)
@myloves, I hear you. My daughter was in and out of the ER freshman year too (mono). I wasn’t randomly making that part up. But some of us can’t solve the logistics by hopping in a car. Instead we are on the other end of really tearful phone calls from desperate kids that will make you feel desperate as a parent and not knowing what to do. I fully admit that I envied people who could hop in the car. Would have loved to have been in that situation but I wasn’t.
To be honest though, those calls won’t ever end. If it isn’t pneumonia or mono, it will be a sudden and overwhelming mice infestation that somehow you need to help them solve from X thousand miles away. (And yes… this is a true story too and it just happened this past week). If you are lucky, this will be what it is vs. something so much worse and tragic. Some kids really struggle with the transition to independence and adulthood. Let it just be mice. Print the bumper sticker and the t-shirt.
Point I’m trying to make is this. It’s not about the distance. It’s about the readiness no matter what the distance. Keep an eye on that. You want the kid that will call you in tears about the mice, but will then get themselves to the hardware store to buy and set the traps as well as dispose of the kill. A gross metaphor but it’s relevant. This is really a business that will break all but the lucky or the sturdiest of hearts.