thanks for the advise. I’m hoping they will in case my s decides. All the best to us 
this made me teary eyed. It brings back memories of a heartbreaking national competition we had several years ago when he got cut into the semis.. I saw him perform I thought it was a sure spot but everyone was shock that he didn’t. We know its in the judges hand butI saw him prepare for the competition and give his all..it was blood, sweat and tears. I secretly cried for a week and I am pretty sure he did too but then 2 consecutive great news came. He came in third in an international competition and another qualification for an international competition.
He did won grand prize on the intl competition sending us to another country and he was able to perform with a professional orchestra as a prize plus some cash.
Its a rollercoaster of emotion, this path. And its not for the fainthearted.
And Oh, we just got a rejection yesterday from a major youth orchestra.. im sure he was disappointed but he just shrug it off - like saying, ok- next challenge please. but not me..I cried again, lol. And to all the rejections he received and will receive ( crossfingers - not too much)
Love this forum. I don’t have anyone to talk too about my struggles as a music parent.
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It’s super comforting to hear this. My kid is not a competitive musician and really hates it every time he gets into a competitive environment. He does ok there (he can hold his own - he can pass auditions!), but he tries hard to avoid any group where he feels like it’s about competing and showing you’re better than the others there. For him, music is all about collaboration with other people and the positivity around creating together. I’m really glad there are BM in performance options out there for a kid like him. I’m glad there are schools that see and embrace a kid who wants a BM in performance and wants the classical music degree training, but who cares the most about great ensemble playing, and playing a huge variety of music styles, and even getting to play multiple instruments (pit orchestra is his favorite). Even better, some of the professors were excited about his simultaneous interest in exploring visual art, and doing sound design for film, etc. I think he’s going to do all sorts of creative things in college and post college, and he’s very unlikely to follow what many think of as the “usual” path of competitions, wining solos, and trying to get into symphony orchestras. He’ll seek out other musicians who want to create with him. He has organically formed and joined and re-formed so many different musical ensembles over the years. He’s learned a bunch already about how to pull together others he wants to work with. And hopefully he’ll use all his skills, current and all the new ones he’ll gain in college, to find a way to support himself doing what he loves!
I’m learning from this thread that there are many more music paths than I ever realized. It’s great to see the diversity of kids, paths, and programs!
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I have cried a lot too, both from heartache and joy! Unfortunately, we are at a cross roads right now. And I fear we will be crying here pretty soon when it is decision time. It never ends…
We received exactly the same 30K. Very disappointing!
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Anyone receive merit from Umich today?
My son did: $5k. Did you?
My daughter got $40k, but we were expecting full tuition based on what the head of the department told her on audition day.
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Same…we were told by my kid’s teacher that they would be getting a “top offer,” and I know I’ve seen in the past things like presidential scholarships or other full tuition scholarships mentioned, but that didn’t happen. The teacher said to appeal for more.
My son is not competitive either and he hated that aspect of it. He went to a top pre college program and despite what they say, the program and the teachers encouraged a lot of competition. Fortunately there were a lot of kids there who weren’t competitive, you could tell, they were the kids who liked ensemble playing, liked doing chamber and other things.
My point was that traditional music teaching is still very much informed by competition, the audition process into programs and even the teaching is in many cases. Schools are starting to come around, they at least offer programs in being creative with music, collaborating, working across genres, though the old preparing solo instrument students to be soloists and orchestra instruments to get into an orchestra still is a dominant thread in many places. Unfortunately the audition process hasn’t changed much, it is totally about how well you play in a 15 minute audition.
The reality for people who want to be musicians is that likely their world will be collaboration and ensemble playing. If it was possible to put together a list of things you need to ‘make it in music’, I would say the ability to collaborate and work with other people is number 1. I can tell you that in the chamber world, groups that are really talented but difficult to work with struggle. Word gets around and groups that are easy to work with, groups that go out of their way to interact with the audience, who are willing to take gigs as a favor, will get priority when presenters book their series (obviously, you have to be musically up there and unique as well). The same thing within a group, egos and being competitive won’t lead to a good outcome. My son’s group started as a group of friends coming together to read for the fun and love of playing music, and it turned into something else but they still have that love of it.
The second one is more applicable to this thread, resilience. That is recognizing that music can be unfair, that an audition you thought you nailed didn’t work out, that in a competition you played beautifully and didn’t win, that your group applied to play in a festival and didn’t get accepted, but another group you thought was boring got in.
I agree with @compmom that the real world of music is very different than auditioning to get into a music school, what I was trying to point out is that some elements of music can be very competitive and as such, have inherent unfairness in them, or seem to, that’s all. An audition panel or the jury on a competition are human and can come up with decisions that make you scratch your head. Audiences may or may not like what you/your group are doing but critics love it (or vice versa). Basically you have to accept music like any art is a fickle beast and you have to take the lumps it can give and move on:)
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Most musicians my daughter knows at school are like this. Even ones who dream of a solo career usually have varied interests and a strong desire to be part of a great ensemble.
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My D (pianist @Jacobs) aspired to be a soloist when she was around 12 years old. But that quickly changed when she realized she struggled with performance anxiety. She felt soooo much more relaxed and actually enjoyed performing when playing in an ensemble setting, with the music in front of her. (She has been an Incredibly gifted sight reader since she was very young…7 or 8 years old). She knew before attending UG that she wanted to do collaborative piano. BUT, we never found an UG program with a collaborative degree. They are all performance based. I think because she knows she is not trying to be a top soloist, she is less stressed and absolutely LOVES school. At Jacobs, EVERY performance major is required to take collaborate classes. I like this idea very much! The collaborative professors there adore my D because she is passionate about it and they have already given her the green light to stay there and get her MM in collaborate piano with them.
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Deferment is not commonly allowed for auditioned admissions.
Each school could have its own policy, though, so you could check in with them.
New School Jazz email came this morning… S admitted with $35,000 merit. Might be an alternative to NYU.
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D (viola BM) Just received Peabody acceptance! 76K scholarship!
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my son just got Peabody results as well, 50K scholarship, one of the better scholarships he has received and makes Peabody the most attractive conservatory option that he has been accepted to.
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Hey all - Losing my mind here. My son got waitlisted at his top choice. His other choices have issues in one way or another. He did get accepted to an extremely difficult school to get into, but with a music department rather than a music school. Never in a million years did I think we would be here. 4.6 GPA, All Region Jazz, All-District, All-State, etc, etc. But here we are.
I was wondering if anyone had previous experiences with waitlists? Do they move at all? His top choice is not a tippy top tier one music school, btw. Also, what is the etiquette for telling a school that you aren’t attending? Do people usually just accept their top choice by the deadline and then the school figures it out? Or do some tell the schools before the deadline is up? I’m asking because, of course, we want the waitlist to move, but also we should probably let the other school know, as I’m sure there is a waitlist there.
His top choice says we’ll know by early May. After we have had to commit to another school. As I said I’m losing my mind. Thank you in advance for any guidance.
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Will he go to his top choice regardless of merit? If so, accept, and wait it out…if not maybe focus on where he is going to go? Sorry you are in a tough spot. As far as waiting, I’m sure this waitlist game happens all the time so these departments are used to people backing out last minute when spots open up!
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Thank you. Hoping for some merit, of course. But I guess we’ll just wait and see and try to move forward with the other schools. Ugh.
My D is on 1 waitlist and they were very clear to say don’t pass up another great offer on the chance that they get in off the waitlist. Basically, they may get in, they may not, but make a decision as if they won’t, because they don’t know until at a minimum very late April if there will be any movement. They’ll know for sure by early June. Then if it’s an option later, you will likely lose your deposit at the other school, but it’s still possible to accept at his 1st choice. Hope that made sense.
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