Classes not #1 priority but the SAT is...

Parents Forum
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<p>My parents and I decided that we are just frustrated with our junior high-schooler. Thanks to me (his sister), he’s quite interested in looking at colleges and figuring out how to get in and what nots. It’s wonderful because we were not quite sure before because he was just so self-involved! He’s already decided to apply to Boston U early decision (which I don’t support because it’s too early and the next thing…) and this point, BU is looking more like a reach school with a GPA of 2.5…</p>

<p>His first quarter grades just came out quite badly. If I were him, I would reconsider my list of colleges and try to open my mind. Unfortunately, he’s just stuck on wanting to stay in the Northeast and live in a city (NYC not really an option since NYU and Columbia are out of his reach and other schools are mainly for commuters). He’s also decided to look at places with pre-business programs or with business majors. He and I are just SO different that I feel like I’m living with a foreigner!</p>

<p>Right now, he’s focused on other areas of his applications that he feels would make or break his admissions- the SAT and the essay. He practically asked for a SAT tutor and has already started studying the vocabulary! Though we have not gotten his PSATs back, but judging from his standardized testing history, he’ll do quite well. Even though my mother reluctantly hired a SAT tutor to start in January for the March exam, she feels that the money is better spent on a class tutor. </p>

<p>I have told him over and over again not to worry about the SAT and just concentrate on doing well in his classes, which he has not. Most of the time, he comes home with very little work to do except for his APUSH. He’d rather hang out in his room playing his video games, watching tv, or playing with his computer.</p>

<p>After that report card, I am basically fed up trying to talk through him that his classes are his number one priority, not number five. I just don’t think he gets some of the mistakes/regrets that I made in high school- choosing to open my mind to other places/options, spend more time getting help for chemistry, and several other little things.</p>

<p>Any suggestions? My parents don’t want to take the stand because they feel that he can’t be discouraged at all and want to be productive/positive in their language. I can be rather harsh but they fear that he will just close his communication with me since I’m the liason between them…</p>

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<p>You’re right, your parents and brother are wrong. In applying to selective colleges grades are way more important than anything else.</p>

<p>(Johnson and Wales in Rhode Island? Babson?)</p>

3

<p>High SAT scores and low GPA will indicate to colleges that he is lazy. He seems to be the type of person who only does stuff he’s particularly interested in, and leaves the rest to rot. I was the same way in high school, although I managed a 3.0, I could have done much better.</p>

<p>Unfortunately, since your parents are not steering him, and he’s refusing to face reality, you are better off just letting this one go. Your brother will see you as a nag if you keep haranguing him (although that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t voice your opinion if asked or be supportive). Some things people just gotta learn on their own; in fact, sometimes those are the most effective lessons. It won’t be the end of the world if your brother doesn’t get accepted to the college he wants, or even any college. He’ll regroup, learn a lesson, and get in the next year, probably more the wiser. Perhaps your parents are deliberately not steering him because they believe this to be the case. Either way, take a deep breath and let him grow up on his own. You’re right, but he needs to figure that out for himself.</p>

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<p>I agree with the above posters. Also, there are tons of colleges in the northeast, particularly Massachusetts and also Rhode Island. If you look at a good, comprehensive college guide, I’m sure you’ll be able to find a lot of choices for him.</p>

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<p>If he’s still in Jr Hi, his grades won’t “count” on his permanent record. My son didn’t start working harder until he hit HS. I’d relax on this for now.</p>

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<p>Bethie - I think she’s saying he’s a Junior in High School. ticklemepink, I agree with the above posters, your brother is not going to become grade motivated because you were. He heard you about the SAT’s but didn’t believe you about the grades because that will take some effort and he doesn’t want to do it. If you have scattergrams from his HS showing the SAT and gpa’s needed to get into the schools he wants that might be helpful but imho, he’s digging himself into a hole and only he has the shovel to get out.</p>