Our son has spent the last 18 months learning to deal with diagnosed depression at a school that specializes in helping kids that suffer from depression, substance abuse, or similar problems. The school goes year round, so he will be finishing his therapy and high school next fall, and wants to begin college in the Spring term of 2016. so a mid-year entrant. His grades are all over the place - his last three high school terms will show marked improvement, and he scored 33 on his ACT and over 2000 on his SAT with virtually no prep work and without finishing some of his basic high school math. So he clearly is smart enough to do the work when he puts his mind to it.
His life essay will be quite special, as he has become an excellent writer and leader at the school he is at. My question to this great group of advisors who seemingly have gone through everything is:
Are there good schools that have shown willlingness and ability to take kids like this off the typical path AND
How to handle a mid-year admit application?
Do mid year entrants get offered financial aid?
I think I would have him go to a school that is near home.
I would find one that is not a reach but challenging enough.
I would think twice about mid year start as more support and more new people are going to start in the fall.
Or maybe start with CC and then transfer?
This is a bright kid who might be better off at a small, but engaging, liberal arts college. I understand that he also might be better off within a reasonable driving distance from home, so that the parents can be there in a crisis, or he can get home for a little TLC. The smaller colleges are likelier to offer more nurturing environments. A CC can be impersonal, and probably won’t offer the intellectual stimulation that a young man like this could use. Possibly a college that uses written evaluations instead of traditional alphanumeric grades would be a good fit. Are there any small colleges in your area that fit the bill?
All schools will have an office for students with disabilities. Even our local, small university has an excellent support system in place. I agree that he should be close to home and that it would be better to start in the fall.
DO NOT PUSH HIM. I cannot emphasize this enough. As it was put to me: “You want to keep the ball in play.” You can probably figure out what that means.
Have you gotten in contact with NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) yet? If not, I urge you to do so. Sign up for their free Family-to-Family course. It’s a 12-week class that is most often described as a “lifesaver.” I am so impressed with the organization that I am joining our state chapter’s speakers bureau.
My other advice: Keep telling yourself that his life is not a race. He may need to pace himself and take more time than traditional students. It’s OK!!!
I wish I had listened to advice like this when our son was first diagnosed with schizophrenia as a college freshman.
thanks for the comments. He is interested in a wide variety of things and locations, so that is a bit of a challenge. For larger schools he is interested in UW, Montana State, NYU, Tufts, and Oregon. Smaller schools include Puget Sound, Whitman, Willamette, Bates, Hampshire. So split small and large and east and west. He is also looking at the Colleges that Change Lives site, hence the UPS, Whitman, Willamette, Hampshire inclusions. Pretty early in the process since the fog recently lifted and he is starting to think ahead for the first time in a while.
thought about the CC route - he would rather not do that, even if it means a compromise in the school that he attends. very helpful, and thanks again!
I would suggest a small liberal arts college not a large university. I’d discourage applying to a school that is a reach-instead choose one with academics that will be well within the student’s comfort zone even if the bumper stick does not wow. Emphasis off grades but on expectations that he attends class even if attendance is not mandatory. Choose a school that allows for coming home when the student feels like it for weekends. Establish ahead of time that you expect to be able to communicate with the school, see grades, etc. Establish that before student realizes that some parents don’t expect to see grades or communicate with the college-don’t wait until he finds that out. Avoid pressure cooker schools.
^^^ @bigskyparent, If you are located in MT, Carol College could definitely fit the bill described above. Excellent academics but not a pressure cooker.
Since it sounds like you’re in the West, I suggest your son focus on a school in the West. At a school in Washington or Oregon the distance won’t seem so daunting for holidays, etc. Still plenty of new adventures and experiences to be had, without the full day of plane rides and expense that travel to/from New England necessitates.
I would also encourage him to start slow with a lighter than average load. That first quarter of freshman year is a crucial time for adjusting to a new place, making friends, finding activities to engage in and getting comfortable with the different relationship that exists between faculty and students (as opposed to teachers and high school students). He should also have a therapist in his new location with whom he can check in regularly just to make sure he’s on track and to whom he feels comfortable turning if/when things get stressful (midterms and finals being two typical pressure points). If he’s already in a comfortable relationship with a therapist, it will be easier to spot if he’s getting ‘off track’ in some way. And set a clear expectation up front for the kind of/frequency of communication home - a weekly Skype on Sunday afternoon? A quick 5 minute call every 2-3 days? This can always be modified after the first year, when he’s on track and doing well. You want enough structure there to know early on if something’s happening. (And yes, a small liberal arts college is definitely the way to go. You want people to notice if he’s not showing up. That just won’t happen on a huge campus with massive dorms, big lectures and anonymous dining halls.)
He is making a fairly thoughtful list for the LAC, I can see the theme in the schools, PNW is pretty nice and laid back. I’m wondering how NYU got in there? It is so different does he prefer being in NYC? NYU is really hard to crack as an outsider. I know kids from CA who were not happy with the lack of community and they didn’t like some of the more insular cliques. Of course it has something for everyone in a way.
He is not going to be able to be a spring admit at many of these and really with his good score he will be missing out by not applying for the following fall. Spend the free time doing anything, travel, outside enrichment, but strictly no college classes to maintain freshman status.
I have no personal experience with your son’s issues, but I also wonder if he should consider starting the following year as a fall admit – it might be easier socially and academically to get in the swing of things with an incoming class rather than being on of the few new entering students in the spring. Also spring admits can bet put into whatever housing is available so he may not room with other freshmen (a question to ask when you look at schools). I do agree that a LAC environment or even a mid-sized university might work well. I’d talk about the options with someone at his school.
Start at a small LAC in a fall semester. Really important to students with mood disorders. Make one of the five freshman courses Physical Education/Dance.
Adding on: recommend not going to a school with Greek Life as that can add undue pressure. Also, agree very much with the LAC as he’ll get a lot of one on one attention and, should he need it, the LAC can be more flexible than a larger institution. Good luck.