College is over what do I do then?

<p>Not for me yet, I'm still in HS. But, when college is over do kids go back to there parents temporarily and buy an apartment or house and move? Or do parents help pay some of the down payment for a house and the child re-pays later? I'm confused since the best option would be to have an apartment with friends and split the rent so things would be cheaper. And from what I know, not everyone gets a job directly out of school.</p>

<p>Well, the goal is to NOT come home! Hopefully, get a job or be admitted to a graduate or professional school program and arrange housing at the next school. My son stayed in his college housing (off campus) this past summer while he worked since the lease ran until mid-August and he is getting ready to move to the city where his next job is located. He has lined up an apartment. Many graduates find others and share an apartment because it greatly cuts down on the expense.</p>

<p>it depends</p>

<p>if you get a job in a city where your parents don’t live, obviously you live on your own. depending on your income, the local rental market, who you know there, and your tastes in living arrangements, you will rent your own place or share with roommates.</p>

<p>Folks who do not get jobs right away usually live with their parents I guess. It obviously helps if your parents live where there is a good job market.</p>

<p>If you get a job in the city your parents live in, you have a choice to make. Whether or not, and how long, to stay with them. That is going to depend on how much you want your own place, your finances, and how you get along with them. Even staying with them for a little while can save a lot of money, and make your apt search less pressured.</p>

<p>I doubt many people buy a place right out of college, usually people rent. Do parents help with down payments? If they have the money, and thats their values, they do. Note, its supposed to be a gift - lenders generally don’t want you to borrow the down payment, as thats supposed to be your skin in the game, and their protection.</p>

<p>edit - I see you are from the UES. That puts a different spin on things. If you dont have a job on graduating, well NYC is the biggest job market in the country. So a logical place to be. If you DO get a job right away in NYC, well its also the most expensive place in the country. Much advantage to staying with parents. And also NYC has one of the most convoluted rental markets in the country - one time fees, rent stabilized units, etc. Even more advantage to staying with parents. If I were a new grad coming out of college with parents on the UES, I would surely stay with them till I found an arrangement that worked. </p>

<p>When you do go on your own, you may have to say farewell to the UES for a while :)</p>

<p>If you are a guy, by the time you are done college and have a serious relationship, your girlfriend will decide for you where the two of you will be living.</p>

<p>you’re not confused… tons of people do exactly what you said. They rent a place, with people they know or with people they find to live with.</p>

<p>people who graduate college do not have enough money to buy an apartment or house generally, as that costs hundreds of thousands of dollars and some good credit (at least theoretically) to get a mortgage.</p>

<p>if your GF decides where the two of you are living, and she is not the only one making money, then you should find a new GF that is less controlling.</p>

<p>for people who don’t get jobs, they are going to grad school most likely (or things like peace corps). You can take at loans for grad school and housing, or if your parents are able maybe they will help with some of the costs. Some grad programs pay minimal money that is enough to live on (cheaply).</p>

<p>“when college is over do kids go back to there parents temporarily and buy an apartment or house and move? Or do parents help pay some of the down payment for a house and the child re-pays later? I”</p>

<p>All depends on what you and your parents agree to. However, what I’d expect of my kids is that after college, they could return home and pay rent and live by the house rules or they could get a job and live on their own.</p>

<p>Both H and I went to grad school (which we paid for with fellowships, jobs) right after college, working a job and living on our own over the summer before grad school. </p>

<p>Both of us lined up jobs before leaving grad school, and also worked and saved money to pay for apartment deposits, transportation, etc. After grad school, we moved to our new cities and worked. </p>

<p>I don’t personally know anyone who bought their kid a house after graduation. I do know someone whose parent gave them a gift of a house down payment, but that person was already married, working, had a family, and had finished grad school. The person’s family also was well off.</p>

<p>Although most of my friends are solidly middle class, I don’t know of any who would be able to pay the downpayment for a house after their kid graduated from college. Most of my friends have to pay loans for their kids’ college, and are also trying to save money for their own retirement, something that is extremely difficult to do in this economy.</p>

<p>another option i have heard of is that some affluent parents will buy a condo in their own name, as an investment, and let their kid live in it (at a nominal rent or free). I think that may be from the old days when you could deduct interest on more than just your primary residence.</p>

<p>Or from the old days when condos might possibly be a good investment!</p>

<p>what is “best” depends on one’s perspective, desire for independence, and money.
Assuming all are typical, healthy people:</p>

<p>It is usually best economically, to move back in with mommy and daddy and have no bills, or few bills. A child’s life can be simple. Even those paying rent to Daddy probably aren’t paying full market value or getting full privileges. Sometimes, it is necessary though.</p>

<p>Some think it is best for the child to become an adult, supporting himself in the adult world, after the years of home training and the college training. Bear in mind it wasn’t the parent’s intent to help you through college so you could move back into their home. You could have skipped college and the expense, if their goal was to continue having you live there.</p>

<p>Naturally some can do it quicker than others, some can do it easier than others. It is not uncommon to need a roommate or 2 in young adulthood while one is first establishing himself in his career. Some choose the easiest route, some prefer the pride and independence that comes with supporting oneself, even if it’s more difficult, or less plush than parent’s home.</p>

<p>MOWC is absolutely right, the goal of a college education is(primarily) so one can support himself. Each individual with family must choose what is right for them.</p>

<p>One thing a young adult seems to forget- just as parents no longer have the right to tell that person what they must do, the student also does not have the right to tell parents what they must do- it is their home. They don’t have to take kid back, or they may set limits, it is their right in their home, and the student’s right to do the same when he has his own home. They may give a gift to help him get established, or they may not.</p>

<p>Also if you’re a guy- there is a pride and a confidence that comes with inviting a girl back to “his place” for a movie, or a glass of milk, or whatever- even if its an apt with a room-mate- that just doesn’t happen if a guy invites a girl back to “his room” in Daddy’s house. A fellow of 23 in his own place has a confidence another fellow of 23 doesn’t have if he lives with parants.</p>

<p>My DD is going for architecture, not the most lucrative career in the world. IF by some chance, she gets her first job out of school here in DC, I would be very welcoming of her living at home at the beginning. Instead of paying us rent, I would ask her to pay a specified amount equal to her savings on rent (which we would estimate together) into a savings account. We would of course expect her to take an adult share in the chores (as we have been doing in this post HS graduation summer) and I suppose, to chip in for her share of groceries. She probably won’t land back here, and if she does may not want to move back home, but why give a landlord hundreds of dollars a month for the life lessons of keeping an apartment? (especially as she may well have already done that last couple of years at college) </p>

<p>My mom lived at home till she married my dad. They continued to live with parents for a while after that. She became a mature adult who raised two kids, cared for aged parents, etc. That was the “greatest generation”. Why does this generation need to pay rent to learn to be adults?</p>

<p>"My mom lived at home till she married my dad. They continued to live with parents for a while after that. She became a mature adult who raised two kids, cared for aged parents, etc. That was the “greatest generation”. Why does this generation need to pay rent to learn to be adults? "</p>

<p>I wouldn’t have wanted to move back home after college. I would have felt like a child living with Mommy and Daddy.</p>

<p>I wanted to have my own place --selected by me, decorated my way, stocked with exactly the food that I wanted, while I stayed up and went out and turned on music that I wanted and had company over when I wanted without worrying about disturbing anyone else. </p>

<p>While our sons are welcome to move back (and pay rent) after college, neither has wanted to do that. Both seem to want to have the same kind of thrill of living on their own that H and I had when we were young adults.</p>

<p>I agree with brooklynborn. The greatest generation did live at home due to economics. Our kids may have to do the same if their economics dictate. Perhaps the mature thing to do would be to live at home, while saving money. No shame in that. I don’t think any healthy young adult would want to move back home, but may have to due to lack of job opportunities.<br>
When I moved out of my childhood home, my rent was 60 dollars/month with water and gas included. I shared a small one bedroom apartment with my roommate. We had two double beds stuffed in a small bedroom. This wasn’t a dump either. I lived in a very very nice part of town in an older apartment. I didn’t have to pay for cell phones, internet, trash pickup or TV. Now, its very expensive to live on your own. Rent is very high compared to what my kids make a year and we live a pretty cheap city.</p>

<p>Both my kids lived on their own immediately after college graduation - my son actually lived on his own most of the time from age 20 onward. When they were paying their own rent, they always lived in shared housing situations, usually as subletters – my daughter is now in NY and actually paying less than $500/month rent in an apartment shared with 2 others (she has her own bedroom, but the reason her rent is low is that they figured out square footage, so my guess is that the room is probably quite small). I don’t think my son has ever lived alone – though now he has a wife and kid as opposed to roommates.</p>

<p>My son is in graduate school and lives in a shared apartment (on the other side of the country from where he grew up). </p>

<p>My daughter, who is about to start her senior year in college, is planning on working rather than going to graduate school after graduation. Even if she comes back to the metropolitan area in which my husband and I live (which is uncertain), she would not want to live at home: most of the jobs that she would be suited for are in the central city, and the commute there is brutal (and expensive!). She will probably be looking for a shared-apartment situation, preferably with a roommate or roommates whom she already knows (but she may have to settle for living with someone new). She probably would not be able to afford to rent an apartment on her own on an entry-level salary, and even if she could afford it, I think she would prefer to spend the money in other ways.</p>

<p>Both of my kids moved off-campus after their second year of college (at different colleges). To them, the shared-apartment situation is normal. I think that my son, who has lived in three different four-bedroom apartments, has had about 20 roommates for various periods of time over the last four years. He can live with anyone, as long as he has his own bedroom, and I think this is a good thing.</p>

<p>Some of the ‘greatest generation’ lived with family due to a severe housing shortage post WWII. </p>

<p>To the OP, part of what happens in college, is the expansion of your horizons. Yes, many get apartments, share houses, move back with family as the job market allows. But it is also an opportunity for seeing the world, or a new part of this country. Some join the Peace Corps, the military, teach English in Asia, etc. There is no one track, and much to explore!</p>

<p>Many things have changed. Rents are up, salaries are up, expectations are up, etc. Much of greates gen(esp women) lived at home due to tradition and oppression of women.
When the greatest gen was young, few women attended college compared to today, most were expected to remain virgins in parent’s home until marriage and then become a good wife mother and homemaker. Men were commonly the only wage earner. And that was a time when many may have had one tv, but there was typically one car per home, one phone, etc. A person can live cheaper if they choose fewer toys or fewer conveniences.
for better or worse, women now have many more choices than in those days, and along with those choices comes the necessary learning to fulfill those dreams. Different dreams mean different expectations.
Young people don’t have to choose cell phones, internet, 100 channel cable, and new cars, but they often do. Even wireless laptops will often work in an apartment bldg or big city without buying internet. Nothing wrong with making choices for these conveniences, except if a person chooses such things but then says I can’t afford to support myself, then I am skeptical. Too often they cannot support themself in the style they want right away and that is very different. I’ve seen young college grads turn down a very so-so job to stay with parents, waiting for a much better job opportunity. Ok by me if it’s ok with the parent, but don’t call someone like that unable to support himself. That would be choosing not to support oneself in order to remain in the style and comfort of mommy and daddy’s lifestyle.</p>

<p>Oh come on. You need the internet and a cell phone to complete in the world today. TV not so much. And if you look at salaries they are down and haven’t kept pace with index prices since the 70’s. And my kids don’t even get phone coverage in their apartments. BTW my kids don’t live at home, I’m just saying if a kid wants to stay at home to save money before they get out on their own or when they are looking for a job, So What???</p>

<p>I am saying a person might have a bare minumun plan, or maybe a land line. As for internet, who said no internet? Yes many need it. But there are ways to access it without buying an internet service in one’s home. I am saying a young adult can choose more economical choices that may be less convenient than what he might be used to, but such choices might enable him to support himself. I’d urge artmommy to re-read my posts here, and not to take one snippet out of context. I have presented more than one perspective here.</p>