<p>I’ve been doing some searches on “safety” on these forums, and the term primarily seems to refer to “safety schools” (meaning backup schools to apply to if you don’t get into your first choices). There doesn’t seem to be much discussion on “personal safety” (i.e. crime rates).</p>
<p>I’m curious if any of the parents here could relate their opinions on the personal safety of their children who are attending college? Are parents fairly confident that their children are making reasonable decisions and living in safe environments while they are attending college, or is this an area of concern? Do college parents provide any advice on this topic to their kids while they are attending school?</p>
<p>Safety is a really broad topic. You’re going to get a wide range of responses here. </p>
<p>Even if you’re looking at crime rates, are you talking about crime on campus, or in the general vicinity? Some campuses can be extremely safe, but if you venture off campus two blocks, you’re in a very high crime area. If you are concerned about safety on certain campuses, you’ll have better luck posting this question on each college’s forum.</p>
<p>Both my kids attended an urban U (USoCal), which has had some high profile violence. Both kids were very aware of personal safety issues and never had any violence directed at them or any one they knew. The school would not be an academic safety these days, as they reject many highly qualified NMFs and others.</p>
<p>Hi Teriwtt,
Yes, this is a very broad topic. I am more interested in the opinions of parents than specific stats. Both on-campus and off-campus areas are relevant since college kids typically spend time in both. This is a general question regarding whether this is an area of concern for parents, whether their kids have encountered problems, etc.</p>
<p>I’ve passed along to my D the same advice I got in college: </p>
<p>First, try to avoid threatening situations. Avoid isolated spots on campus, especially after dark. Use the buddy system. Be aware of your surroundings. Keep your head on a swivel, scanning the environment for threats. This prevents you from looking like someone who can be surprised or ambushed. (These days, that means don’t be absorbed in your phone as you walk along.) Walk with purpose instead of dawdling. I also taught her the key trick.</p>
<p>I don’t worry about it too much, which is surprising since I’m a worrier. She’s social being, and I think she’s usually with the herd.</p>
<p>Personal safety was not a big concern of mine for my son at college. He had been gradually allowed to travel both by plane and by car and over night without parental or adult supervision well before college. We had been together out of town when he had figured out the public transportation system on his own.</p>
<p>We had discussed the risks involved in substances beginning when he was very young since I am in recovery. Because I’m an attorney we had also gone over the legal risks related to criminal behavior as well as “dumb ideas” that can go wrong, very wrong.</p>
<p>He had been sexually active before college so we had gone over those issues for years before college.</p>
<p>I had the benefit of having watched him in over a decade of tae kwon do. I’d seen him take and give blows.</p>
<p>We had been white water rafting when people got hurt and one died. I had seen his reaction to the situation and the death. We had been hand-gliding and parasailing together and he had gotten a low level hand-gliding cert. I knew how he approached risk.</p>
<p>IMO a parent can manage the risk to the student best by what has gone on the decade before college.</p>
<p>I think any safety tips you pass onto your kids before they go to college are safety tips you should pass along to your kids who aren’t maybe going to college, but are moving out on their own. Crime doesn’t necessarily discriminate.</p>
<p>Probably the biggest hazards, particularly for new students somewhat naive to such things, are on campus, particularly where alcohol flows. Remember the thread about sexual assault and alcohol? Rules for personal safety and security that any student should follow:</p>
<ol>
<li> Don’t get drunk.</li>
<li> Rule 1, especially in the presence of other drunk people.</li>
</ol>
<p>Being drunk means that you:</p>
<p>a. Have worse judgement and situational awareness.
b. Are less able to escape the attention of someone with criminal intent.
c. Are less able to coherently report a crime to the police.
d. Are more prone to being accidentally injured.</p>
<p>Beyond that, college students’ dorm rooms may also be seen as tempting targets by thieves. Many college students grew up in low crime areas and are not used to locking doors and windows, or keeping an eye on easily stealable valuables. Keeping dorm rooms locked when not occupied, and not leaving easily stealable valuables unattended are simple ways to greatly reduce the risk of theft in college environments.</p>
<p>Long before college, in our case. We taught both our kids the basics of how to be safe and street smart beginning when they were in middle school. D went to college in a city with a fairly high crime rate outside the school’s “bubble”; she never felt unsafe, and we never worried about her. S is a senior in a more suburban/small town school that also has its share of crime, and the same applies to him.</p>
<p>Of course being streetwise doesn’t mean something can’t happen to you, but what LasMa wrote should be basic information that every student has well before they go off to college.</p>
<p>Part of the reason why I don’t worry is my son. He has traveled alone, here and abroad. He is not a big risk taker. I have given him increasing amounts of freedom as he has grown up, and he has handled the freedom well. He, too, has had the talks about sex and drugs and drinking. I have to trust him to make good choices, and I think he will. It doesn’t hurt that he is a boy, and a big boy at that. </p>
<p>The other part is the campus. I don’t think it is very dangerous there. I did attend a talk
by the campus police, not because I was worried so much as curious what the big dangers were. Property crime, especially bike theft, and underage drinking are the biggest problems. I subscribe to the campus police newsletter and read about property crime and dumb stuff drunk kids do. </p>
<p>If he had a car I would worry more. Traffic is terrible where he goes to school. If he attended a different school, one in a rougher neighborhood, I would worry more, but I would trust him to make good choices.</p>
<p>I thought you meant for myself & I was going to say that I feel much safer now that I have a good sized dog that I know would rip the throat out of any one who threatened me, because he had a cow when he thought the garbage can was attacking me.</p>
<p>My daughter runs marathons & she is fast & feisty. I got all my worrying out when she was in Tamil Nadu after high school.
( or a lot of it)</p>
<p>I am concerned. I am that parent on the tour (some of you may remember :D) who always asks what happens when an outside door is propped open in a dorm? A few colleges have the doors set so after a certain amount of time (a couple of minutes, usually), there is automatic notification of campus security so they can come and make sure it is shut. Very few colleges have this setup, but I figure if people keep asking more places may install. Those that have it often have already been sued due to incident in their dorms where unauthorized criminals entered via a propped door. I also ask about their blue lights and whether you have to stop and speak (thus making it harder to keep running if you have to), or if you can just push the button to get campus security. In addition, I checked the crime statistics for the neighborhood and college.</p>
<p>I have also talked to my kids about locking their rooms and taking their keys when they shower, and locking their rooms while they sleep even if their roommate is still out. Also chatted with D2 just last week when she mentioned “going for a walk” at night that she needs to have company if she does that. She assured me she did.</p>
<p>Additionally, I have instructed my kids (since both went to colleges with campus security who were NOT part of the local police force) that if a crime occurs (theft, assault, etc.), they need to make sure they report it to the local police, not just campus security. If campus security says they will report it, I or my kids would follow up to make sure this happened and the report was accurate (hasn’t happened, but we are prepared to do so).</p>
<p>I can’t recall receiving any info on this from my kids’ schools, but they may have received some.</p>
<p>Drinking increases assault by males and females. Drinking occurs on most every campus. My D is lonely at her school as she refuses to party and thus is left out of many group outings. I am glad that she is not part of that scene, but she tells me even the serious students and Christian students drink and party. It can be a very lonely weekend if you are not into that scene. The best research we did and she is at a school where kids have fake IDs…get alcohol from 21+ RAs and she is disgusted with the atmosphere. She wishes she lived at home on weekends since weekends are the worst or could leave campus and stay in a safe place on weekends at a hotel. Good luck.</p>
<p>D1 (a recent grad) didn’t show much evidence of street smarts until recently. I didn’t worry about her on campus. She was nearly always with a savvier friend or two- and even served a stint as a campus escort (ok, with a giant, strong guy.)</p>
<p>College kids don’t “typically” spend time both on and off campus. It depends on the college, it’s area, what’s going on on-campus, etc. Mine only went off to WalMart occasionally. Or CVS or the movies. You have to see what the actual situation is. Schools run films, have lectures, events, plays, concerts, etc.</p>
<p>As for on-campus problems- yes, so many kids party hard. I’d amend ucb’s rule #2: don’t drink unless you KNOW someone has your back. You can have problems with that sober person who sees you’re incapacitated.</p>
<p>After that, let me say this: I went to grad school at a place located in a wealthy enclave. The shortcut to the freshman dorms was through a park. Over and over again, solitary girls would take the shortcut. And, there were reports of problems. You have to teach your kids over an over and over, what risk is and that no sense of “I can fight him off” replaces wise choices.</p>
<p>We say “be aware of your surroundings” to S at the end of every phone call, as he used to be a little on the absent-minded-professor side of things. Having said that, the only way to develop street smarts is to be on the street, so to speak.</p>
<p>Does her school have the following characteristics?</p>
<ul>
<li>Coed.</li>
<li>Not a historically black school, nor one with a high black and/or Asian enrollment and low white enrollment.</li>
<li>Prominent fraternity and sorority system (or similar organizations).</li>
<li>High percentage of athletes and strong emphasis on athletics.</li>
<li>Small.</li>
<li>Ready availability and low cost of alcoholic beverages in the surrounding community.</li>
</ul>
<p>Thinking back, probably the best thing we did was go to environments that were not safe (not intentionally but inevitably) while traveling in the US and abroad. Handling the situation, walking right, etc was a learning process. We live in a small town, nothing happens here. We all traveled extensively together. I learned alot!</p>
<p>One if the first things D did when visiting her U just before she transferred was have dinner with her HS buddies there and ask them for the real scoop on how to be safe at that U, down to where is it safe to carry a purse or backpack vs just whatever fits into your pants pocket, where to avoid, and other safety tips. She also got other directives from older brother who had enrolled at that U 2 years prior. They are both pretty street smart now and able to take appropriate precautions in urban environments and other high crime areas. We are glad they have learned these skills, especially since both have chosen to live in large urban cities and travel.</p>
<p>Honestly, I don’t/didn’t worry about my kids in college. Neither drink nor are big partiers. They grew up on the outskirts of NYC and had been going into the city starting in high school. They seem pretty sensible. We did worry more when younger son spent his first winter break in Pakistan and India (even he was perturbed that there was a bombing in the market the day he left Pakistan), and then he spent his junior year abroad in Jordan, taking mid-semester breaks both times in Egypt. Knowing him, he’ll give us a lifetime of worry with his travels!</p>