@Coffeeaddicted “My dad is a scientist who takes Genesis symbolically”
This is very good news, in my mind. It suggests that he is not too extreme in his views. It also suggests to me that he understands the value of a good science education, and the value of some of the research opportunities that a good college can provide.
Separately, when developing your list, it will be better if you proactively add in some of the colleges that your Mom wants. It never hurts to go visit them. Maybe it will surprise you. Before you go, be sure to have a list of questions that point out any concerns you have and see how they respond.
I assume that you are planning to attend graduate school after undergrad. If so, be sure to investigate the Grad school admission results of each school. Any college can place individual graduates into top Masters and Phd. programs, but the top undergraduate schools will tend to place a very high percentage into top programs. That is especially true if you stay at their school. For example, DD is considering doing an extra year to get a Master’s degree at Penn. The admission rate is about 20%. However, for Penn undergraduates in good standing, the acceptance rate is very high. I am sure this true at most top colleges.
@coffeeaddicted “I’m afraid my parents will be afraid to send me to most of these places, for fear I’ll return after the first semester a socialist”
Not that many students are socialists on these campuses. I think that the term liberal, as it relates to college, is generally focussed on treating all types of people on campus with mutual respect, regardless of race, sex, etc. It is very difficult to run a campus without this. It does not mean you have to agree with their views.
Once you have investigated colleges some more and had a chance to work out some specifics regarding what you like about the schools you are targeting, I would consider initiating a discussion with your Dad about the types of things you are looking for, without mentioning specific schools. This will begin to develop a mutual understanding about traits and give him a chance to comment. Later, when you begin to identify some specific schools of interest, and provide reasons, they will be the same as the reasons previously discussed. Starting with traits and getting to college names later will hopefully avoid the situation where you provide the names and get attacked before you even explain your reasons.