<p>So, we’re pretty happy that our son is choosing to go on a ski trip vs. a “girls gone wild” type trip to Cancun or something similar. Although, I can understand how kids in the “frozen tundra” schools might want to get away to some warm sun. Of course, the ideal, a spring break trip to New Orleans to construct new houses would be great - but is not in the cards - at least for this year.<br>
But here’s my question - How much influence do parents have over this choice? We nixed the Bahamas for senior week but we now feel that spring break is his decision. Of course, we are not funding these excursions, but our son has some money saved up from jobs.
My mother-in-law insists that we should strictly prohibit any inappropriate trips - even in college. Just pull the financial support, she says. I think she’s a bit of an extremist but it got me wondering how other parents are dealing with this issue.</p>
<p>This has never come up in my family as neither of my kids have been interested in the spring break type things that you describe (Cancun etc.). However, unless there was something very unreasonable or unsafe, and given my kids would be financing their own vacation, I would let it be their choice. </p>
<p>Here is what my kids have done over spring break so far:</p>
<p>D1:
Freshman and Soph years, invited for ski vacation at one of teammate’s many vacation homes, this one in Utah. Teammate’s mom was there and hosted the kids. D paid for her own flights and ski passes.
Junior year: visiting grandmother in Palm Desert, CA by self</p>
<p>D2:
Freshman year: all expense paid trip with her Scholars program to work with people in the arts in Appalachia
Sophomore year: visiting grandmother in Palm Desert, CA, bringing a friend</p>
<p>Bah. I can’t stand the idea of Spring Break “gone wild” trips. Luckily it seems that D will be joining 2 friends (brother/sister) in NYC for a 4 day theater-going extraveganza. The other family is springing for the hotel room, D only needs to get herself there, and pay for theater tix and food, which by the way, is out of her pocket.</p>
<p>Whew!</p>
<p>We haven’t experienced this problem either. Yet. Last year DD was just happy to come home and chill with HS friends. Between dental appts., doctor visits, catching up with movies, restaurants and sleep, she had no “spare” time to regret. This Spring she is bringing a friend home, and some mini-road-trips are planned. She was almost going to join her floor mates in a California trip, but then realized that she would be the only one who wanted to see and do things, while the others were going to sleep and drink, so…we are delighted to have her home.</p>
<p>We’ve been lucky so far too. DS travels with his team and coaches (who give curfews!) for pre-season in a warmer clime. Last year was San Diego this year Puerto Rico.</p>
<p>Any school where the kids aren’t spending spring break frantically trying to get caught up isn’t worth attending ;)</p>
<p>At least, that’s what my kids SAY they’re doing every spring break. Although once my son came home and slept all week.</p>
<p>Oldest son went with a couple friends on a trip once to the Caribbean --his money. He also went once to Cancun–also his money (that afterwards he felt was wasted).</p>
<p>D. hasn’t saved enough to finance trips–so no trips for her.</p>
<p>Youngest spent last year and will spend this year studying. This year he has two tests upon returning–he says no time to do anything else.</p>
<p>I see it solely as a matter of funding. If you’re funding the education, and the grades are where they should be, it’s fine as long as they pay for the cost of the break trip.</p>
<p>No money? Don’t even ask.</p>
<p>In terms of pull your shirt off, consume vast quantities of alcohol, etc… if you do it, I don’t want to know. I don’t want to see your picture on the net. And if you get in trouble because of irresponsible behavior, don’t expect me to be there for you.</p>
<p>Four spring breaks with my daughter. Florida for one - DisneyWorld with college friends, has come home twice, this year she’s coming home for a couple of days and then to Peru for a week with a friend. She pays for any trips.</p>
<p>Son just got home an hour ago for this one. I think it will be a week of sleeping in and seeing what HS friends are home.</p>
<p>I trust my kids and they have their own money from jobs, they’re adults, we don’t have much input.</p>
<p>I guess all those Girls 'n Guys Gone Wild just don’t have parents :D, or at least not on cc ;).</p>
<p>Like everyone else here, we’ve been blessed with a kid who hasn’t wanted to do that. He is going to New Orleans this year - because he was at Tulane pre-Katrina and will be visiting his friends there and having a great time as well, I’m sure. </p>
<p>If he ever did want to go the Gone Wild bit? I wouldn’t fund it (I don’t fund this trip either; just pay the same airfare I would’ve paid for him to come home). I do think it’s his decision now - he’s 20. But I’d re-state my distaste for such a trip (which he already knows). For what that would be worth.</p>
<p>I guess I’m the theoretical mean mom of the group. If my daughter wanted to take a Gone Wild vacation at spring break, not only would she have to fund it herself, she’d be asked to pay the same amount towards her tuition. If she has enough money to go someplace exotic for fun in the sun, then she has enough money to help with tuition payments. </p>
<p>As I said, this only theoretical; my daughter just wants to come home at spring break (and probably sleep non-stop for at least the first three days!)</p>
<p>“Spare money” can go towards their tuition. That’s my take on it. (And then I go on vacation.)</p>
<p>Son will come home for the week, and probably snag some work from his temp agency doing warehouse grunt stuff.</p>
<p>if you are not funding them why do you nix them?</p>
<p>
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<p>problem? why is a kid going on vacation such a problem? or is this activity only reserved for all knowing college graduates?</p>
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<p>You are not the only mean mom. I feel the same way. Fortunately it has not been an issue.</p>
<p>I went to Ft Lauderdale back in the day. Eye opening.</p>
<p>My boys are encouraged to travel. Actually, I wish they would go a bit farther afield for Spring break. Even if they went to Cancun, I know they would get out of town to visit the ruins and the city of Merida. They both love to travel and learn. One is more or less a non-drinker but they both love to socialize and meet new people.</p>
<p>I don’t expect them to sit in church.</p>
<p>But even a trip to a warm beachy location isn’t necessarily a Gone Wild trip, right?</p>
<p>Sophomore year, two of my friends and I paid for a week in a hotel in Jamaica. We had a few drinks in coconuts at the bar at the beach, but there was no drunken debauchery, and our time consisted mostly of lounging at the beach, trying different kinds of cuisines, and hanging out in our hotel room talking with each other. We had a great time.</p>
<p>Who are those Girls Gone Wild, anyway? I’ve seen bits and pieces of their, um, “infomercial,” is it? It’s sometimes on television between 4-5 AM around here, when I guess the reasoning is that young children (unlike menopausal insomniacs) won’t be up channel surfing.</p>
<p>Anyway, my impression is that these girls don’t bear much resemblance to the real-life college students I know. Some of the ones in the advertisement seem to be professionals - though I can’t really say I know any of those, either.</p>
<p>Nope, I wouldn’t pay for such a trip. My kids have done grandparent visits, roommate visits, wisdom teeth removals, and alternative spring break service projects so far. Not that I expect them to sit in church on break, either. My oldest d and her friends paid their own way for a “Beach Week” summer vacation as upperclassmen in college, and I’m sure church didn’t figure in that much.</p>
<p>cheers: This is not about “discouraging” kids to travel. Sheesh. It’s part philosophical, part financial (the big part for most families of college kids), and part practical (as in, parents probably deserve the spring break more than the kid).</p>
<p>Yeah, we would never pay for these crazy trips to the Bahamas and Cancun. But we seemed to be the minority during high school senior week. Lots of son’s classmates went on these trips - fully funded by parents. We put our foot down and said no - even though he was willing to spend some of his hard earned money. Now that we’re parents of a freshman in college, I just wonder if this will come around again (those crazy media reports don’t help). So far, so good. But I think if he did want to go, we would have to grin and bear it. He’s 19, is doing very well academically and has earned mutliple scholarships due to his hard work.
Hopefully, we won’t have to face the situation. Our experience with his high school still sticks with us though!</p>
<p>Well sheesh weenie, I never said that parents should pay for travel if they couldn’t afford it or were opposed. I merely said I encouraged mine to travel and I didn’t expect them to behave like they were attending church.</p>
<p>Part of encouraging kids to travel is allowing them to choose the destinations --includng Cancun–and trusting they will explore foreign places with genuine curiousity rather than sit in a bar 24/7. So far, that’s been the attitude of my kids who have travelled solo to a few different continents. Along with their undergraduate and graduate university education, I happen to believe that travel is an essential part of their global education. I am willing to pay for some of that travel. </p>
<p>For example, the Yucatan is a fascinating place to explore. I could send my sons down there in a minute–knowing they would be off and tramping around the peninsula and knwoing they would be fairly smart.</p>
<p>I did the Girls Gone Wild experience in senior year of high school in 1975. It was an eye opener–particularily for a kid who didn’t drink that much travelling with a wilder bunch. I didn’t have an inclination to travel with them again but it was a learning experience all the same. That wasn’t the highlight of my early travels but it did teach me that I could navigate some tricky situations and keep myself safe.</p>
<p>I realize I am in the extreme minority of CC parents. That’s okay. Different opinions make the CC world go around.</p>