Hi.
First, congrats on the acceptance and having great options.
The reality at Columbia and most colleges is the answer varies widely by the student. Most find their people, some do not. Most find a work/social balance, some do not. The ones who don’t of course will say its too competitive, that it’s not collaborative, that there’s no social scene, etc. And that is true from their POV.
My son is not very social but fell into a great social group almost immediately. It started as a study group and became a friend group. They seem to have a loose collection of members so some subset is always available for studying or doing something as a group. Most people taking studying seriously and many of the classes (particularly the STEM ones) take a lot of time outside of classes. On the other hand, he has some non-STEM (core) classes that are taking very little time. So it’s kind of up to what you choose to pursue.
There’s certainly always some social activities happening on campus – both formal produced stuff and informal parties, etc. But, yeah, it’s NYC, so it’s not surprising or a bad thing that many people and groups choose to take advantage of that and explore the city and area. The school actively promotes that fact and most of the first year orientation program is exploring the city as a primer for that.
My son’s found it reasonably collaborative. And less competitive-minded than HS. This was the consistent experience for all our kids at competitive colleges. These kids come from being super accomplished and competitive in HS and sometimes instinctively bring that same mindset with them and have to adjust. So first year is a transition year to figure out you’re mostly competing with yourself. Unlike HS where most had similar goals (to get into a top college), in college their goals are so diverse that it’s less of an issue, with the possible exception of those competing for the top finance internships.
Columbia is not a major party school overall (which I don’t have a problem with), or much of a sports school. So the social scene doesn’t revolve around school sports events. That’s true of many (but not all) of the Ivy+.
So far faculty have been very approachable, and flexible and supportive. And at least for my son they are interested in teaching. Also, it’s pretty easy to get reps about the professors and cherry pick if you try.
In addition to this forum you might also apply to join the “Parents of Columbia University Students” forum (if you are a parent and not the student) on Facebook. If you decide to join, answer the questions about your student accurately as they do screen for membership to avoid spammer or lurkers.