@NYCmama
As the mother of an extremely hard to parent child, please read this with the tone is intended. Your more recent posts are all the more reason to not be worrying about college. Coping with growing up yr by yr and seeking what fits their needs may not even be college.
I have an adult child with a very high IQ and academically could learn anything. (He can memorize pages of info insanely fast.) But, he suffers from disabling anxiety, has very poor executive functions, cannot multi-task, and cannot handle open-ended assignments. He is an Aspie, but definitely fits more of the real world under-employed Aspie than the stereotyped "quirky, highly successful geek. "(Unemployed or under-employed is unfortunately the reality for a high percentage of those diagnosed on the spectrum.) As an employee he needs an environment which is constantly affirming, repetitive, and micromanaging.
My biggest regret as a parent is all the $$ we spent on college for him. We spent far mor money on his education than all of his siblings combined. I wish we could have that money back and establish a small business for him based on his obsessions. Managing it for him would be less time consuming than what we do now and that environment would have been more affirming for him as an adult.
We have learned that parenting off the path is actually more important than following the path we think seems best. Hindsight is 20-20, but some things you can’t correct easily. His path is one.
Take it yr by yr and keep all doors open. It may be the well-traveled path. But it shouldn’t be even in the planning stages at 5.