Comments on my essay?? (UVA)

<p>Topic: Student self-governance, which encourages student investment and initiative, is a hallmark of the U.Va. culture. In her fourth year at U.Va., Laura Nelson was inspired to create Flash Seminars, one-time classes which facilitate high-energy discussion about thought-provoking topics outside of traditional coursework. If you created a Flash Seminar, what idea would you explore and why?</p>

<p>It wasn’t until August of 2009 that I discovered the importance of the other worlds that exist within us, particularly the world that exists within our oceans. My family and I were visiting the Georgia Aquarium. As I was surrounded by a plethora of aquatic life, I was enamored by the beauty they possessed. The barrier between humans and aquatic life faded as I discovered what seemed to be a world within our world. They were so similar to us but led completely separate lives. By seeing them up close, I established an unspoken connection with each creature. I admired the way they seamlessly coexisted.</p>

<p>I think it was because of this experience on that day that I have become so passionate about the efforts made by the Safina Center especially, which is an organization that studies how the ocean is changing and works to educate people on how they can help conserve the world’s oceans. We only have so much time on this planet and we owe it to ourselves and our home to conserve its resources. As I continue to grow and mature as a person, I want to become involved with educating the general public about the importance of ocean conservation, hopefully establishing a connection with humans and the ocean we rely on. Connection is so important to humans. It’s our only way to empathize with the world around us. I hope to begin ing and educating the world with a Flash Seminar, where my peers and I can discuss the real effect that the ocean has on our world, in an effort to discover the dangers of a world without the ocean. Through this, we can discover meaningful ways to preserve our oceans and its wildlife, and hopefully keeping our Earth healthy for as long as possible. </p>

<p>As a warning for other students and yourself: please refrain from posting your essays as such due to the risk of plagiarism. Rather, use the “private messaging” tool and send it to people willing to help out. </p>