Common App Short Answer

Applying to College Common and Coalition Application
1

<p>What do you think of my short answer? I feel like it’s too straightfoward.</p>

<p>Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum). </p>

<p>I volunteered in the nursery department at the Yohan* Medical Center. My tasks include delivering baby formula to mothers, secretarial work, folding towels, setting up cribs, serving food to mothers, etc. These tasks gave me a glimpse of what it was like to work in the hospital. Even though I was there to volunteer, I got to see a lot of the action. One of the most memorable events I encountered while volunteering there was seeing premature babies. I distinctively remember the 2 lbs newborn in the corner of the room. His parents were by his side at all times possible, shaking if their child was going to make it or not. </p>

<p>There I was complaining about the hospital’s cafeteria menu, something so miniscule in the grand scheme of things. Being in a place where dangers are always present made me so much more grateful for what I have. Sure I do not have the perfect life, but I do have my family, my friends, an education, and a home. When I applied, I did not expect to get anything besides experience, but I ended up getting a wake-up call. </p>

<p>*Name disclosed</p>

2

<p>Well, I am applying to the U.S. as an international and I still do not exactly know what the essays should look like, but from what I have seen and read I might give you some feedback :)</p>

<p>You obviously have a great experience volunteering in that hospital…I just think you went more in the breadth than in the depth (I hope you know what I mean), take a specific moment such as the experience with the newborn and describe it more (how you felt about it) so that it would more reveal your personality… the end is not clear to me (the wake-up call…)</p>

3

<p>Essays should be concise so I think you’ll be fine. :)</p>