This discussion was created from comments split from: Gender Inclusive Housing @ Exeter.
People who don’t understand strong, steady and intelligent consensus building risk diminishing their cause and credibility.
It’s that simple, @panpacific , or that hard. 
And that lack of consensus building is most prevalent in echo chambers, which CC sometimes becomes.
“consensus building”? Was gay rights/gay marriage a good example of that? Have we as a nation reached that “consensus”? And as we speak, the vice president apparently is reigniting a “cultural war” (https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2017/03/pence-wife-billy-graham-rule/521298/)! When will that consensus be reached? How long should the minority and the disadvantaged suffer and wait for that “consensus”? Yes, it is that hard.
Actually, gay marriage is a great example, and I sincerely hope you were ripped like I was when O and Hil, et al were against it.
I’m not sure that consensus building needs to include archaic views lol.
Consensus building means that you get a majority of the relevant group on board, and a key part of that is not lambasting anyone who disagrees with you. If you try to force something down your opponents throat, not only will they harden their position, they will also exact revenge if given the chance,.
How otherwise smart people fail to see this baffles me.
But what about in the case of Civil Rights for example. Was the rest of the US just supposed to wait for the south to come around? They voted overwhelmingly against it and when irrational views like that are passed down from generation to generation it could take a hundred years to move past it.
In an open debate, a common strategy is lambasting your opponent in a hope to convince the audience. Chance for the opponent changing his position is negligible no matter what.
Actually, true consensus is not getting the majority on board. That is majority rule. Majority rule is two wolves and a sheep voting on what’s for dinner.
Consensus is reaching agreement on how to move forward. This may mean that dissenters do not fully agree but that they do not disagree so much that the decision offends or injures them and they feel the need to stop it. Often it is the minority who are against the path forward, but it could also be carnivorous wolves agreeing to a dinner of vegetarian lasagna.
Consensus takes a lot of patience and active listening. And accepting that there are often several truths.
It involves seeking out people who will disagree with you. It’s also about understanding someone else’s position better than your own and being respectful, and openminded during the process - even if it feels like that person is holding your head underwater.
Every successful person ( I know ) engages others like this on a regular basis, and has this skill down.
This all sounds like a primer for marriage O:-)
And raising teenagers…
I know- right? 
@AppleNotFar , especially the head underwater part… :))
My morning BC ( Before Coffee ) posts always have violent overtones of some kind and I have no idea why that is.
I don’t even attempt to post (or try to build consensus!) BC ~O)
Easily Rule #1!! LOL
BCBC (building consensus before coffee) is a logical fallacy.
Situations when I am more than happy with a consensus: where to go out for dinner, what to do on a Sunday, whether to shower now or wait in line.
Situations when I will not settle for a consensus: discussions of human rights.
Not unlike what K2 is currently facing in his Kindergarten Class.