http://nypost.com/2017/08/25/cuomo-pal-behind-double-murder-suicide-of-wife-daughter/
I can understand the money worries. But why kill your wife and daughter? Was he unable to confide in his wife? Or get therapy? Or find some other solution than the horrible one he chose? I can’t stop thinking about this. And his poor son.
I think that people who consider such things are in such dark places that confiding in a family member or getting therapy are not things they would think of.
I have never been able to fathom the murder-suicide mindset. Apparently these individuals convince themselves that their children/family would be better off dead. Perhaps it is indicative of the depths of their despair, or of that coupled with a controlling personality or lack of empathy. I’m sure it has been studied.
Extreme narcissism. Everyone close to me only exists to play a role in my life, so that if my life is about to end they go with me. Because without me, they have no role in the world. Not that rare, unfortunately, but I have no idea how to detect it in advance.
Unbelievably sad.
This couple took their own lives but thankfully not the lives of their college aged children:
http://nypost.com/2017/07/28/couple-caught-in-financial-spiral-jump-to-their-deaths/
The kids’ lives will never be the same. I can’t believe someone would commit suicide out of financial despair. There must have been some deeper issues (mental illness?) involved.
It sounds as if they were, unfortunately, living far beyond their means. If they could afford to pay $76K per year for combined HS tuition, they could easily have paid off a $60K student loan, for example.
They might have suffered from an excessive need to appear always willing and able to provide very generously for everyone, always pick up the tab, never ask the cost. If they couldn’t live without playing that role in their family and social circle…
It is too bad. One wonders if therapy combined with dispassionate financial counseling could have avoided this. If only they had asked for help. But it sounds like they were invested in being the one from whom help was asked.
Of course, I’m just speculating, based on the article.
Speaking of which, I really do think that they should have refrained from printing the colleges of the children. Let them have SOME hope of privacy.
And the NY Post is highly misleading, for no point whatsoever. It seems the husband was not an intimate friend of Governor Cuomo; Governor’s spokesperson said Mr. Cuomo hadn’t seen the guy in 15 years. So by what NY Post journalistic standard is the perpetrator a “pal” of the Governor? Donating to a campaign doesn’t make you a “pal” of the candidate.
It did say in the article his father was violent, so I wonder what, if any, was going on behind closed doors. Maybe they were arguing and he was in a fury. People do things in a fury. I had a co worker years ago, nicest guy. He said he would never own a gun, because sometimes people get so angry that they do things in their anger, that they never would have done if the were calm. It’s really like they are truly out of their minds, out of control. My co workers premise was that we all have this in us, this blinding rage, and it’s not abnormal if a gun were around to reach for it. I thought at the time it actually makes a lot of sense, and I still do. I doubt it was premeditated, as his son had left already for school. I highly doubt he was planning on murdering them. Just my thoughts.
I think it situations like these there is a desire to seek rational explanations for occurrences (in terms of why, what could have been done to prevent it, etc.). But I think when you are talking about killing your wife and daughter, there is nothing rational about it.
@BunsenBurner – my office is a block away from where they fell. I was working from home that day. So tragic, so awful. Only thing worse is if they had fallen on a pedestrian. I guess maybe that’s why they jumped so early in the morning.
@LakeWashington – I agree – the “Cuomo pal” thing was a later headline. The Post was just trying to keep the story alive with the thinnest of connections.
@Consolation – I totally agree. Poor kid has it tough enough.
One other thing to keep in mind is that in NYC and other areas…especially among upper/upper-middle class circles, it’s far too easy to fall into the trap of keeping up appearances and “keeping up with the joneses” because that’s the prevailing culture of some of those social circles/groups.
One can see this among the UES set at my public magnet or among some former colleagues who were asking to borrow money on a regular basis from their colleagues despite earning salaries well north of a quarter or even half a million/year and up as base salary before the yearly/performance bonuses.
At an early corporate job, I myself had to report a VP from another division who was in such dire financial straits that he was even hitting up entry-level employees like yours truly for a “loan” which was not only serious improper imposition, but also a clear violation of corporate policy of the firm*.
That and the Post has had a long history of sensationalizing stories and trying to make them scandalous…especially in a partisan manner.
Hence the “Cuomo pal” thing or their disregard for the privacy of the surviving children affected.
The funeral was today. The son spoke. Filled with forgiveness, love, and grace. I hope he finds peace.
http://nypost.com/2017/08/30/son-calls-murder-suicide-dad-greatest-man-i-ever-knew/