CRAZY Experimental essay

<p>Hey guys, quick question. I'm trying out an "insane" essay for the ivies I'm applying to. Basically, this is a gamble; it's either going to be an epic win or an epic fail. Also, is it ok to "list" stuff in my essay? Please help me out haha, here it is, and enjoy. THIS IS COMPLETELY EXPERIMENTAL.</p>

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<p>I’ve spoken with Abraham Lincoln, but I haven’t held his hand yet.</p>

<p>I’ve felt the pangs of forbidden love, but I haven’t been in a serious relationship yet.</p>

<p>I’ve fought in World War II, but I haven’t held a gun yet.</p>

<p>I’ve played alongside Itzhak Perlman, but I haven’t learned violin yet.</p>

<p>I’ve been to Jerusalem and Cairo and Sacramento and Mexico City and Seoul, but I haven’t stepped foot off my plane yet.</p>

<p>I’ve hiked to the top of Mount Everest, but I haven’t gotten a permit yet.</p>

<p>I’ve been to hell and purgatory and heaven and back, but I haven’t died yet.</p>

<p>I’ve applied to Harvard but I haven’t gotten in yet.</p>

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<p>Do you guys like the premise? Please give constructive criticism, even flaming is welcome, if you feel compelled to do so.</p>

<p>=D</p>

<p>I've read your essay, but I haven't gotten to know you yet.</p>

<p>I'm still undecided, but if I had to describe it in one word it would be...monotonous.</p>

<p>You should consider a more comedic approach.</p>

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<p>no, no, no. this doesn't tell us anything about you personally at all. this is monotonous already and too cutesy. you must dig deeper and get to something of substance.</p>

<p>Thanks for your input =D
I'll rewrite a more conventional essay.</p>

<p>Your analogies make no sense. You certainly haven't spoken with Abe Lincoln or fought in WWII, but you certainly have applied to Harvard. What's the connection?</p>

<p>No.</p>

<p>listen to brownParent.</p>

<p>This sounds a lot like another essay I read online somewhere. This guy wrote about all the awesome, insane, most likely exaggerated things he did in his life, and ended his essay with something like, "But I still haven't gone to college." </p>

<p>So... I don't know. Interesting idea, but not insane in terms of insanely creative. I agree with the others. It's not very personal, I think.</p>

<p>Very cute.</p>