Critiques on CA transfer general essay

<p>Hello. Here is my essay for my transfer app. I am applying to the film schools at NYU USC and Chapman.If you have time, let me know if there is any way I could improve this. Thank you for your time! </p>

<p>As a senior in high school I was naive and unsure about what I wanted in a Film School. Now 2 years later I believe that I have grown as person, and have a better understanding of the type of education I want to receive and the type of students and professors I want to interact and network with.<em>My time at Emerson College has been good but after being here for about a year and a half I have come to the conclusion that it is time for me to move on. *
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Most students at my school are more technical filmmakers than creative filmmakers .Knowing the ins and outs of various cameras and lights is an important aspect of filmmaking but they are meaningless if there is not a good story being told.Many of the films created are beautifully shot, but lack substance. I want to surround myself with students who are more enthusiastic about the stories being told rather than equipment being used.</em></p>

<p>The location of Emerson also is playing a big factor in my desire to transfer. Boston is an incredible city and it has begun to feel like home to me but I know once I graduate I am going to move to a city like Los Angeles or New York with more film opportunities. Attending a school in those cities would be ideal because of the networking and opportunities that can come up while in school. Having an overall familiarity of the area once graduated can potentially be an advantage as well as I won’t have an adjustment period after moving post-graduation.*</p>

<p>I have not been getting as much as I would like to out of my major courses. I seem to have learned more in my extra-curriculars than in the classroom. I am a believer that extra-curriculars can sometimes be equally as good as the classes you take, but when spending thousands of dollars on a single class, one would hope learn a lot from the course. For example in my first production class my professor talked mainly about new media, when the time would have been better spend talking about the basics of fimmaking. I would like to attend a University that will let me get the most out of my classes. I want to be completely enthralled by a course, and take in as much information from my professor as possible. </p>

<p>I spent my time at Emerson well. I was involved in clubs, took on leadership positions, and got the most I could out of my major courses and my general education courses. I am certain that I will be able to take this same drive and burning desire to succeed to your school.</p>

<p>It’s not good. You make too many generalizations about other people and you don’t talk enough about yourself or what you have done.</p>