<p>Exactly, Vitrac. Even in the desert there are flash floods.</p>
<p>It would be horrible to need to drive and not know how.</p>
<p>Exactly, Vitrac. Even in the desert there are flash floods.</p>
<p>It would be horrible to need to drive and not know how.</p>
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I agree … partially. I agree having a professional deliver the instructions and giving criticisms can be the best in many situations … however parents can be vital for practice and more practice. For the OP’s daughter it sounds like she may be capable enough just too nervous and worried to drive comfortably yet. With my kids along with their professional lessons I took them to a local neighborhood with wide straight streets, no traffic, and lots of visibility for practice. We stayed in that neighborhood until the kids were comfortable moving to a more challenging driving environment. One kid took a couple days … the other took a lot more days (10 maybe). It sounds like the OP’s daughter might need even more … but given the time to get comfortable at each level of driving then moving on without any judgement or frustration about how long it takes might help her move forward.</p>
<p>He was another one of those kids for who driving represented the loss of important reading time.</p>
<p>This is true for older son. Even tho he drives often now, whenever someone else is in the car, he prefers that they drive so he can read…and he keeps tons of books on his phone and Nook.</p>
<p>I agree with vitrac on this one. Count me in as someone who believes driving is an essential life skill. Whether you choose to use those skills is completely up to you.</p>
<p>Having had my license for 36 years now, I can count a dozen times easily where I had to take over driving when the person I was riding with was unable to continue. Would have been stranded at a campground with another mom and four small children in the dark after she tripped and broke her ankle, one time. You just never know when you’re going to need those skills.</p>
<p>OP - has your D been evaluated by an Occupational Therapist? S went to the OT at age 4 (on the advice of the pediatrician) and when the OT called me she explained that he had:</p>
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proprioception (her spatial sense, her sense of where things are and how fast they are moving)<a href=“thanks,%20cf%20%20post%20#%20121%20-%20I%20could%20not%20recall%20the%20term”>/quote</a></p>
<p>She also mentioned something about not knowing where his body was in space.</p>
<p>When the OT described this to me , I stopped her and told her that she had just described the story of my life. Like your D, I was an honor student who struggled to learn to swim, ice skate and ride a bike. I eventually was able to do these things, but somewhat later than my friends/siblings and it was always a struggle for me. I failed driver’s ed and had to repeat. I have now been driving for 40 years but have never been a very confident driver, not from lack of experience, but I believe from the above condition.</p>
<p>As for S, the OT sessions made a world of difference and he is actually a good driver.</p>
<p>Please consider this for your D. Good luck!</p>
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<p>I get the point of the analogy, but being able to swim is not the same as being able to save the life of someone drowning. Look at how many people die each year doing exactly that. By the same token, taking drivers’ ed and having a license–but then never driving because you don’t have a car or don’t live in a place where you need to–is not likely to instill confidence in anyone who has to ride with you if you are suddenly asked to take the wheel. It takes hours and hours of practice to become a driver who can handle all kinds of conditions–heavy traffic, six-lane freeways, snowy and icy roads in the country or city, blinding rainstorms, etc. I live in a college town and I think part of the reason some drivers are so awful is that many of them hadn’t driven much in the parts of the country (or world) they came from. And a bad driver is a dangerous driver.</p>
<p>Within the category of driving as a life skill, however, I would add driving a stick shift. When I was in college I was the only one of my friends who knew how when a girl we lived with had an emergency and needed to be driven to the hospital. The only car available was a manual so I ended up taking her. To the point made earlier about renting cars on trips to Europe, most cars are still manual transmission–so it’s still a good skill to have.</p>
<p>Yep, I never had an automatic transmission car until after my second child was born.<br>
I think manual transmission skills are a dying art but a good one to have. DH taught both my boys on his old pickup truck years ago. They’ve not kept in practice but know the rudimentary skills and could prob. do it if they had to. </p>
<p>I have never lived anywhere with public transportation. You never know where life will land you. My DH worked long hours and I stayed at home with the kids. Cannot begin to imagine how I/our family would have survived if I couldn’t have driven.</p>
<p>My suggestion: OP’s daughter should set 2 goals for herself prior to leaving for college: learn to drive and learn to swim. For me, swimming is, arguably, more important than driving as it is a skill that can truly save her life. Just my 2 cents. </p>
<p>She is obviously a bright, perhaps goals-oriented, young woman and these two goals are doable for her. She will feel good about herself when she goes off to school if she can accomplish these basic skills. Life only gets busier after high school–now is the time to get it done.</p>
<p>Back in ‘the day’, swimming was required for graduation at many schools. May still be the case in some places. Our HS makes it a priority, although not a requirement.</p>
<p>Lawnmower, golf cart–both good suggestions for practicing. I’m wondering if a driving simulator video game is available for ‘practice’?. More private lessons or behind the wheel time with parents are in order.</p>
<p>^^I’m with you Sally, we made sure our son could drive a manual transmission as part of his driver training. He was a natural and I often assume other parents have similar learners. …Guess that’s not always the case.</p>
<p>University of Chicago has (or had) a mandatory swimming course for all students. I thought that was interesting when we toured there.</p>
<p>masslou, I know more people who have tried and failed to drive a stick shift than those who have mastered it. It’s amazing how few adults know anymore, let alone kids (of course, only a small fraction of cars even come with manual transmission any more). When my daughter had to replace her car that was totaled, she found one on Craigslist that seemed perfect except for not being an automatic. Rather than let that deter her, she read up on it and became fascinated by the various benefits–being more fun to drive, being more fuel-efficient, giving the driver greater control. So she bought it and her dad and I gave her some lessons. She was a really quick learner and now can navigate any driving situation with ease. The other good thing about having a stick shift vehicle as a teenager (apart from being a huge deterrent to texting/talking on the phone while driving) is that very few people will ask to borrow your car. :)</p>
<p>My dh was disappointed when the new mustangs came out a few years ago and all the ones at the dealers were automatics. The early cars were great to drive as a stick. I know how and one of my dd does. Our youngest has never had an opportunity to use one. However, she is a fantastic Chicago driver and can parallel park on a dime.</p>
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<p>Hmm. Yeah, some people are not naturals at learning to drive.</p>
<p>FallGirl and others who have spatial problems, or whose kids do-- how long did it take you to learn/teach your child to tie your/their shoes?</p>
<p>Mom2ck, I rode a bike very young and very often, and I was a certified lifeguard in high school. I don’t know how I would have done with the bike as a mode of transportation to unfamiliar locations, though.</p>
<p>Quiz time for all you expert drivers: You’re driving along and you want to make a right turn. There’s a bike lane to your right. How do you proceed? What if there are cyclists in that bike lane?</p>
<p>Cautiously. I never trust bikes or pedestrians. I would have my turn indicator on and slow way down and try to make eye contact with the biker. If the biker is closing in on the intersection, I let him go first. Again, I never trust bikes or pedestrians.</p>
<p>I’d treat it the same way I treat any lane change; start signaling, wait until the coast is clear, and move over. If I can’t move over safely, I miss the turn and have to double back somehow.</p>
<p>I know the injunction is to “share the road,” and I don’t mind doing that, but I do get annoyed when bikers insist on having the same privileges as drivers without feeling a need to demonstrate the same obligations. Bikers who ignore the rules of the road (and they are legion) get on my nerves too.</p>
<p>^Agreed. We have so many MAMILs here (that’s “middle-aged men in Lycra”:)) who are oblivious to cars in their Eddie Merckx fantasies, along with all the students and others who are walking or riding bikes in a daze (and don’t even get me started on the “bropeds”). You just can’t trust them.</p>
<p>I work in midtown manhattan and now we are overrun with nitwits on wheels. It horrifies me to see people who absolutely do not know how to ride a bike putting themselves in moving traffic. And, of course, no helmets. If you are wobbling and your wife is standing beside you yelling “you can do it” you are asking to be road kill and I wouldn’t be too sympathetic. It just amazes me how people forget to pack common sense when they travel.</p>
<p>Onward, BZZZT! Wrong answer, but thank you for playing.</p>
<p>NJSue, correct! Nice job. </p>
<p>Onward, and the rest of you: You turn right from the rightmost traffic lane. That includes bike lanes. Therefore, before turning right, you have to merge. You first change lanes into the right-turn area, which is directly adjacent to the curve. There might be some cyclists there, or there might be some cyclists about to be there, and they have the right of way over you, so please merge safely.</p>
<p>It is exactly the same as if you were driving along a road with two car traffic lanes in your direction. If you were in the leftmost traffic lane going your way, you would not attempt a right turn without changing lanes. I hope.</p>
<p>Drivers, all of whom I am sure think they are good drivers, illegally swerve across the bike lane to turn right all the time in my area. Also, on mountain roads, far too many drivers pass on blind curves by crossing the center divider. So when you are teaching your child to drive, teach them not to do these illegal and dangerous maneuvers.</p>
<p>I can swim to save my OWN life, as can my kids and maybe hubby. None of us are strong enough swimmers to attempt to save anyone else. We CAN however throw something to help keep a struggling swimmer afloat and call for help. Trying to rescue someone when you are NOT a strong swimmer is a recipe for disaster. I took lifeguard training but could NOT swim strongly enough to rescue the instructor who weighed 2-3 times my weight. All 4 of us naturally sink (not float) when we are in the water. I insisted our kids swim well enough to get to the side of any pool they may find themselves in (HI has LOTS of swimming pools, including several at relatives homes). </p>
<p>I think it IS important to be able to swim well enough to save yourself and told our kids from the youngest ages that it was one of the few things I absolutely required of them. They took swimming with their cousins, so it was more fun for everyone and they learned faster. The instructor came over to the relative’s home and taught each child individually. It was a very fun few summers and all of them swim OK and have fond, bonding memories of those years.</p>
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How is this even a question? Put your indicator on, look for where the bicyclist is and if it’s safe to do so (or you can “make it” ;)) you turn. </p>
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I ain’t merging in to no bike lane to turn right. I’ll be in the farthest right lane for CARS and turn when I can. I highly doubt a police officer will pull you over from not merging into a bike lane before turning right. That rule sounds preposterous. </p>
<p>I really hope in your town bike lanes are on a different position on the street than is commonly seen in Florida. To think that “swerving” across a bike lane is illegal sounds dumb to me. It’s a bike lane. It’s there. Just go over it if you need to turn…</p>