Daughter Can't Drive

<p>I don’t know why this is, but road biking in my area seems to be popular among 50+ aged riders. So even if your town is too expensive for most young people, it’s not too expensive for everyone, and possibly the some of the people who do live there will begin to commute by bike in the warmer months. Or perhaps they already are.</p>

<p>In my experience, sometimes municipalities put in useless bike lanes that go from nowhere to nowhere. But when I’ve seen sharrows, they’ve gone on roads that cyclists were already riding, at the impetus of the cyclists. For example in this case, cyclists asked for sharrows:
[sharrows</a> | m-bike.org](<a href=“http://www.m-bike.org/blog/tags/sharrows/]sharrows”>Sharrows Mark Shared Lanes for Bicyclists | m-bike.org)</p>

<p>That could be the case, I haven’t seen them yet but maybe that is what they are working towards. Right now, so far as I know, that one main road is the only one that has any bike lane and I think most of the other roads would probably not be safe to ride on unless they were repaired and made wider… so it is kind of strange that it is there. I’ve never seen a single cyclist and I think it’s been a year now since they put the lanes in. And this road, it’s a “main” road in a sense that it is very busy and it’s where a lot of commercial things are located, but most of the houses are not. It is kind of out of the way from where most people really live.</p>

<p>It would be nice if the local companies followed suit and became more bike friendly. When I was getting up at 5am to work out anyway I thought it would be very nice to walk to work, it’d only take me about 45 minutes and then I wouldn’t have to be awake at 5 for the elliptical, but I am not sure if it would even be okay for me to be seen walking in and out of the building in exercise clothes. I have done it a few times when I was headed straight to physical therapy after work and if the wrong person saw me I would be in trouble, I had to sneak out.</p>

<p>Inexperienced road users are certainly a problem. We had our share of them, especially in the summer months when we’d get inundated by foreign language students, including cyclists and pedestrians. We had the added difficulty of our visitors not being used to dealing with traffic driving on the other side of the road.</p>

<p>Ema, about walking to work (in clement weather, not now): You say that you can’t walk into your building in “exercise clothes.” But is there a happy medium between the dress clothing you have to wear for work, and the sloppiest t-shirt and sweatpants that you might choose to work out in if you were in the gym? If you’re walking, couldn’t you wear good looking casual clothing, with walking shoes, and change into dry clothing when you get there, using a few wipies to clean up? Cotton shirt with a collar, cotton pants or skirt, walking shoes, or something similar?</p>

<p>Regarding companies being bike friendly. I think most companies were like that to a certain extent but they still expected you to dress suitably for your position. You could see ladies wearing skirts and high heels riding their bikes to work.</p>

<p>Edited to add this was a fairly flat town, most bikes were of the town rider variety with ladies and gents models, not your racing or mountain bike type. Also, while we certainly had cold, wet and windy weather for a large part of the year we are not talking extreme conditions and very little snow.</p>

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<p>In my experience, drivers who aren’t cyclists aren’t very good at determining what roads would be good for cycling. They don’t realize what makes a road good for utility cycling, and they don’t realize what makes a road good for fun. Roads that are narrow are OK unless they are also high-speed and busy. Hilly, twisty roads are fun roads, providing there is not too much car traffic. Wide, straight, flat roads are good for getting somewhere, but not the kind of road you’d seek out if you just wanted to go for a ride.</p>

<p>Also, and this is so true it’s a joke among touring cyclists, drivers are absolutely terrible at describing the length and topography of roads they drive on all the time. They’ll describe a huge terrifying hill, and it turns out to be a routine hundred foot climb, or they’ll say the road is completely flat, and it turns out to be totally flat except for that thousand feet in elevation that you have to gain and lose to get to the flat part. And they’ll say it’s ten miles when it’s thirty, or they’ll say it’s fifteen miles when it’s five. I don’t bother asking anymore.</p>

<p>I am talking roads that are so riddled with potholes I am worried about damaging my car, barely wide enough for two cars (no shoulder) with bumper to bumper traffic and speed limits of 45-55mph. The bikers would have to ride in the same lane with the cars in many spots, dodge the giant potholes, and not get run over-- and the drivers have no idea how to ride with bikers.</p>

<p>The good news is, they are steadily repairing the roads and I think most of the main ones that are really bad will have to be resurfaced within the next few years. I wonder if they have any plans to add bike lanes or sharrows to those. It just doesn’t make any sense to put it on the one road and nowhere else. The road they added lanes to, imo, actually didn’t even need to be redone so I wonder if the goal was really just those lanes.</p>

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<p>That sounds like roads that suck for cycling. (They don’t sound any too glorious for driving, either.)</p>

<p>Lately I’ve been wondering why the city in my town has been widening roads that don’t new to be widened when the block over is torn up with potholes and ripped out concrete. Recently they filled the holes, but it’s such a cheap material that an all too common flash rain will take out the filler. Tada! You’re pothole is back. I just might make this my thesis because it is clear that what they’re doing isn’t working…</p>

<p>Turns out my campus has bike lanes that are exactly like the ones in my hometown. Got a few pictures while driving. Although, I don’t know how to post pictures onto CC…My campus is very bike friendly. I would say it’s a little too friendly. The bikers are so comfortable that they’ll dart out into the street because they have the right of way. We’ve had numerous amounts of kid getting hit on their bikes (and with that hit and runs :eek:). Drivers aren’t without fault in this problem. Both sides are aggressive. But in the end, only the bikers are the ones that get hurt.</p>

I just had to reply to this thread. I am going through the exact same thing with my oldest D. Teaching her to drive has been a nightmare. She despises it and doesn’t like it when either of us tries to teach her and I can understand that from her perspective as it IS a high pressure situation for a young person. She is now about to be 20 and still without a license. She even let her permit go and opted to get a state ID instead. Now she is mentioning learning to drive again but I am simply not believing her. She just doesn’t seem serious because she is showing NO initiative. I have been the one mentioning getting her permit again and getting professional instruction at a local driving school. She hasn’t really mentioned it at all and she is acting like a goof off. She has spent the last several weeks with her boyfriend and friends and they are all carting her around and she is rarely home. D does earn some money working from home but it isn’t a lot. I don’t know whether to push it or just wait for her to do it on her own. I’m sick of being on the roller coaster and worrying about her future. It seems as though she feels like it’s not a big deal. However, when she needs a higher paying job and needs to get around she’s going to regret this. I don’t know what to do right now because she is rarely home and she does have her own money. Technically I’m not having to drive her around or inconvenience myself. I just wonder why she mentioned wanting to drive again and needing it for the future and is now acting like life is just a playground. Ugh…I am just not sure what to do. When she WAS driving with my husband he mentioned she was always very nervous and took a long time to pick up on the basics. I don’t mind if she chooses not to drive but it is annoying that she is mentioning it again and then not taking it seriously. It’s like she is still in high school. She is also highly intelligent and has ways of making $ on her own without driving but it certainly will never be enough to sustain a living. I would be willing to take her to driving lessons and even help fund some of the cost but only if she is serious. She doesn’t seem serious and I feel like I shouldn’t bring it up again until she shows some interest. I just feel like I’m on a roller coaster because she sounded serious about it and I started researching options for her and now she is not mentioning it at all. Not sure what to do. I can’t be responsible for her forever. I can give her emotional encouragement and a bit of financial support when possible but that’s all. I’m not going to have a basement dweller that relies on me for rides in 10 years. Sigh

Have things changed for you OP? Have you been able to help your D get her license? I need some inspiration at this point. Younger D is 13 and I am hoping that it isn’t this difficult for her when she gets older as I’m sure II can’t handle the stress of this again. I miss the days when they offered driver’s ed in high school and it wasn’t so complicated to get a license. We were required to take it in high school and get the in-car instruction. My parents never taught me to drive and it was much better that way. Dad only drove with me once and had a huge screaming meltdown and Mom never has ridden with me anywhere in all of these years. Dad sent me off to driver’s ed and never took part in my driving skills. It’s not possible to do that today. No wonder more and more kids aren’t getting licenses.

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