I get a lot of micro-aggressive behavior towards me at my college. For those that don’t know - A microaggression is an intentional or unintentional verbal or nonverbal behavior towards somebody that communicates hostility or negativity to that person based on their race/ethnicity, but it’s more slight and subtle.
I’m going to keep everything anonymous. So just some background info, I’m an Asian American that grew up in a major city with a ton of other Asian Americans. I’ve never had a problem with racism growing up. This skewed my vision of this country as a whole. I thought people were open-minded everywhere. And to be honest, I saw that my current college is almost all white anyways, but I didn’t see that as a problem. My college is in the Midwest by the way. There are a lot of ‘country’ type people too because the Midwest is mostly country. I came here because it has a great program for my major.
Down to the point, 90% of the people that bring up my ethnicity in a conversation just sound totally uneducated. A lot of times, people think I’m from China even after talking to me. There were multiple instances where a person told me that my English is very good. My roommate was telling me earlier that I probably ate a lot of Chinese food growing up, but truth be told, my parents only cook American food. And I actually don’t like Chinese food that much. This is just a small fraction of the microaggressions I have had to deal with. I’ve also had to deal with two instances of downright blatant racism at my school, which has never happened to me in my life before. My freshman year, a student looked at me and pushed the sides of his eyes up as to mock Asians. And just earlier this summer, somebody yelled “I BET YOU MAKE A MEAN SUSHI” to me. I’m not going to explain the whole context of these instances, but just know that I was in a position where I couldn’t talk or do anything back. Racists are pussies. Oh and for the record, I was never in an ‘Asian bubble.’ I had friends from every different race growing up.
Anyways, I just wanted to get this out. I’m a strong individual and will continue to have positive energy and surround myself with positive people. I just feel like less of an American citizen when things like this occur. When I get my degree, I’m going to stick to the major cities, haha.
I’m sorry you’ve experienced that. People can be so limited sometimes. And then others are genuinely curious and do not mean to be offensive. You just have to keep being you. Wishing you clarity and peace!
As an African-American I can tell you that you won’t ignore it or “rise above” racist comments or microaggressions. Each one will eat you alive and bother you, some more than others.
I don’t see how saying the Midwest is “country” can be offensive. What’s wrong with being country? It doesn’t suggest being illiterate or stupid or being"hillbilly". I know many deans, professors, students who research/study abroad, etc that considers themselves country (which is often used to describe people who love country music, their accent, their love of the outdoors, etc)and there’s nothing wrong with that. I even consider myself country to an extent lol. Maybe if the OP said “redneck” then that would be different.
Anyway back to the topic at hand. There’s no way to rise above the ignorance of others. Sure you can correct them but most of the time their prejudice and in many cases racism does not change, but that is the best thing to do in many cases. But Correcting them does make YOU feel better by defending yourself and shutting down people from publicly voicing their prejudice/racism around you because it is extremely uncomfortable and hard to be around it.
I hate when people say you’ll find rude people everywhere. Microaggressions (which is a form of prejudice) and racism (an extreme prejuduce) are not just “rude” people. Rude is someone bumping into you and not saying excuse me or letting a door hit you in the face because they didn’t hold it open for you or not speaking back when you said hi.
You are an American. Do not let these bigots win by feeling like anything less and do not sit there in silence forever. I hope your school year progresses well and I’m glad you shared this. People often forget that other minorities also experience racism and microaggressions.
Saying country isn’t offensive… And it doesn’t have any negative implications in my post. And thanks for the thoughtful reply Chopin. Most of the time I’m happy, it’s just when things like this occur… It grinds my gears. But in this day and age, there’s more people that acknowledge that racism still exists and I’m thankful for that
The what did you mean when you wrote that line and put ‘country’ in quotes? Maybe I am being too sensitive in taking that as a microaggression against me.
Full disclosure: white mom of an Asian American HS student in the South (he, one Indian and one Portuguese classmate are the only Asian kids of the 125 in their grade – no bubble here either). He spends a lot of time explaining that he’s not Chinese too (our last name is unusual even in Japan and most people think it sounds Italian) or answering the “what are you” questions.
Microaggressions are very real and very stressful. I have to say that some of those comments made to you are beyond what I or my son have ever heard (and go far beyond the ignorant, but hurtful comments that are most common – a Chinese waiter in Washington, D.C., once asked my late Japanese American husband how he learned to speak English so well). When it gets on your nerves, please find someone to talk to about this. Their behavior is absolutely unacceptable, but you need to take care of yourself first. I’m glad you’re getting it out somewhere and I’m happy to validate you. You have a right to be angry and upset, but you seem to be handling it well.
Guys, if your only comment is to suck it up, please move on. Yes, life is unfair and too many people are idiots, but he’s talking about a genuine issue here. In fact, he seems to be sucking it up, but he also deserves a place to vent.
There’s a difference between calling people ‘country’ and racially motivated micro aggressions; I’m not sure of any instances where Americans were systematically discriminated against & oppressed for being from the MidWest. Of course, it’s obnoxious to stereotype all those from the MidWest, but it’s not on the same scale.
Maybe you are conflating “hostility and negatively” with lack of exposure. The first time I encountered an Asian waiter in Paris speaking fluent Italian, a Nigerian in Shanghai yakking on his cellphone in fluent Mandarin, and a white guy sitting next to me on a Tokyo flight reading a Japanese newspaper, an Asian barmaid in Munich wearing a dirndl, I too was surprised. But unlike you, I seem to have a sense of humor…
Unless there was DELIBERATE “hostility and negativity” intended, then learn to be less thin skinned, LAUGH, and use the awkward situations as a positive teaching moment, or else return to your former safe bubble of a"major city with a ton of other Asian Americans" and HIDE.
And no one here buys that your reference to ‘country’ in scare quotes is anything but a patronizing put down by an urban snob.
I take offense to the fact that the Government has a classification called Asian American and lumps every country in Asia into it. More than half the population in the world comes from that continent and that is the label 3+ billion people get?
instead of offering advice or comfort to someone venting abouy a real problem, y’all are all picking apart and criticizing every part of his comment and trying to find fault in it. I see this all the time on CC and it’s honestly disgusting. sigh.
Non-POC don’t experience the microaggressions that all POC face on a daily basis, don’t even get me started. Most of the time it’s awkward and offensive and you don’t know what to do- you try to laugh it off but it sticks with you. It’s hard to rise above or even correct people for those behaviors, because most of the time they don’t realize they’re being offensive or don’t think it’s a big deal, they may even think they’re being nice. OP seems to be dealing with it well but everyone gets annoyed once in a while.
OP, sorry to hear that you are encountering this. some of these actually sound more like macro aggressions than micro. I have always had a stereotype of midwesterners as polite but it sounds like that is not 100% accurate in your situation. I am sure there are Asian American professors somewhere at your college (well not entirely sure, but probably). Can you reach out to one of them to build an in person alliance with people that understand exactly what it feels like? Doesn’t matter if they are your classroom professor or not…a lot of professors are caring people that had to adjust to that town/environment themselves. Being white, someone like me would have much less to offer – I can only sympathize with behavior that I am largely immune to.