Decision-making experiences if/when an ED acceptance comes with disappointing financial aid ?

Paying for College
1

Does anyone have any experiences (or advice) regarding a potential situation where an ED acceptance comes with disappointing financial aid?

My kid has applied ED2 to what is by far the top choice college (an expensive private LAC), because it seemed necessary due to the vast difference in chances of acceptance between ED and RD.

Our family owns a business but it isn’t doing great and financial aid is needed, especially because it will be the first time we have more than one kid in (another) expensive private LAC at the same time.

The financial aid calculators for this (ED2) college as well as all others show we would get decent financial aid, but it is commonly talked about that those calculators are often very inaccurate when the family owns a business.

Specific to this (ED2) college now, I have now heard that at least this (the ED2) college may be terrible for financial aid for those who own businesses ; and that the (ED2 college) financial aid calculator is VERY inaccurate with regard to that college’s calculator and people who own a business.

One never knows, but I really think my kid has a high chance of an ED2 acceptance to this college because it’s really a very obvious strong fit (as I believe shines out in the application that was submitted as well as the interview that was done) and all the stats are a match.

It’s premature to worry before acceptance and actually seeing what (if any) financial aid will be offered…but I can’t help it. The older siblings were able to go to their top choice (expensive private LAC) colleges without hinderance of financial aid concerns.

I know that we can back out of the ED commitment if the financial aid offer is not good. But the thing is, this is the first time our family has every applied for financial aid for any of our kids at any college (the others attended as the only one kid in college at the time, and the owned business was doing much better). So, we’ll have no way to know if the financial aid offers
would be better at any of the other schools applied to RD.

Again - before anyone starts burning me for allowing an ED2 application if financial issues were a concern, the reason is because for this college there is a HUGE difference in ED chances of acceptance versus RD chances, and honestly I believe there likely will be an acceptance via ED but that there would have been virtually no chance of an acceptance RD…and it is the top preferred/top fit school for my kid, by very far. AND…we actually didn’t realize how much the financial aid would be needed until very recently, as well as it only just now came to my attention how inaccurate the financial aid calculator for this school may be for those who own a business.

If the acceptance comes but with lousy (or no) financial aid offered, is there any way anyone has managed to get a situation where the ED acceptance could be changed to release the commitment before financial aid is known for the RD colleges that will come in around 6 weeks later? Any way to delay the commitment acceptance for 6 weeks without withdrawing all the other applications, due specifically to the financial aid situation? I know the answer is probably no. But thought someone out there may have some ideas (I’m desperate).

The thing is , we know it’s always possible to do something insane like borrow a PLUS loan for any amount needed, but I do feel that would be crazy and definitely not worth it if another decent college that was applied to RD would be much more generous. But it would break my heart to say no to this kid’s top choice for money reasons when the older siblings got to go to their equally expensive top choices- I know, life isn’t fair, but usually us parents want to treat our kids fairly and equally, and this kid really deserves it! :frowning:

2

My D’s initial FA offer from her ED school wasn’t to where we thought it would be/needed it to be in order to accept. We are full-need, so a different situation but similar outcome there in terms of needed the FA to work out in order to attend. The ED school was able to grant an extension on accepting her spot, but more importantly they were able to reevaluate our financial aid application and give her more aid, which enabled her to immediately accept her spot. We allowed her to ED to the school based on the NPC for the same reason as you- a significant bump in admission rate for ED that could be the difference between acceptance and not. I hope it works out for your kid! Maybe you could contact the FA office and ask them to run your numbers with the business data to give either peace of mind or a leg up to prepare for bad news.

3

@milgymfam , yes , it has occurred to me to try to reach out to the ED school’s financial aid office to see if they could give some sort of pre-read before the admissions decision comes.

But I’m a little scared to do that because this particular LAC is admissions need-AWARE and I’m wondering if my doing that might inadvertently cause an admissions rejection if admissions office knows about me having this concern (I haven’t thought it through; what does anyone else think)?- then if somehow my kid isn’t accepted and I had done that, I’ll feel guilty the rest of my life that it was my fault and unless the financial aid office does in fact give me the pre-read about financial aid (which maybe is a low chance they would agree to give me that), I’ll also always wonder if not only did I cause the negative admissions decision but also that the financial aid might have been okay but we never got admitted to find out.

[As I write this, I realize I do have a huge parental guilt issue-- …]

4

@splokey The school being need aware does change things IMO and I would not ask for a financial pre-read in that case

5

@splokey

If the business has a surge in the next 3-4 years, and the FA your family receives is smaller in subsequent years, could that be a future dealbreaker?

Our situation was different, but we did say “no” to our youngest re: her first choice school. She had several full tuition offers and one full ride offer on the table at “lesser” schools. We told her she had to take the full ride.

She was outraged and very disappointed. We had to borrow (PLUS loans) to help our oldest get through our expensive in-state flagship, and she did community college the first two years.

It didn’t seem fair to the youngest, but that is how it goes. Our income fluctuates as well, with the potential for job changes. In addition, only the first year at the fancy first choice school was remotely affordable, and that was a stretch. Once we took our oldest out of college and only had one in, hoo-boy, no way could we do years 2-3-4.

Good luck! Be sure to look at the big, four year picture, all kids in or out of school, plus possible fluctuations in the business.

6

My D’s school was also need aware. It honestly didn’t occur to me to ask early because we don’t have a business or divorce or any of the stuff that people warn about making the NPC less valid. I wouldn’t have hesitated to ask though. If you needing the FA keeps them out, but you wouldn’t be able to afford it if they accept… well that seems like two sides of the same coin to me and I’d rather know.

7

I would figure out now what you can afford per year.
Communicate that to your child.
Make sure you have filled out the FAFSA.

Then if the amount offered is under what you can afford, he can accept.
If it is over, then you say that unfortunately the school is unaffordable so you must decline.

8

@Midwest67 , if the business does have a surge and we lose all financial aid in future years, that would be fine-- because if the business has a surge, we would be able to pay the full college cost from a practical standpoint without any parental borrowing. [ We are extremely averse to have to do parental borrowing because we are in our mid-50’s in age and have no retirement savings (the value of the business, to be sold when we’re ready to retire, plus any equity in our home when we sell it when ready to retire, essentially is what we are depending on for retirement).]

9

I would make sure you kid knows that going to this school is contigent on decent financial aid and has a financial safety back-up. I would not reach out now, but after any acceptance and financial aid offer, could reach out and explain the situation. At this point, you honestly don’t know.

If they give you what the NPC says, can your student attend?

10

A school’s being need-aware or need-blind should be irrelevant to domestic applicants. It doesn’t affect how much you like a school, nor how much aid you will get. It affects only the chance of admission, and then often only after the aid budget is depleted (for schools being need-blind up to that point).

11

If you ran the NPC and it looked affordable, then I would print that out now, and if the school comes in way above that I would use it to negotiate. Doesn’t mean they will move, but I think it gives you a decent argument.

12

Hugs, it’s never easy to disappoint your kid.

I agree with the poster above that you need to do a fine-tooth comb of your CURRENT finances, let your kid know that if the cost of attendance is X than you can swing it, if the cost of attendance is above X then it’s out of range.

Then put it out of your mind until you hear back from the college. If the financial aid is marginally within range, then you can contact the school and tell them that you need an extra whatever to make it affordable and see if they’ll tweak. If you are 20K apart from what the school offered and what you need, then the likelihood that you can bridge that gap with a conversation- in my mind- is very, very low and it’s time for your D to get super excited about one of her affordable options.

And try not to frame the discussion around “your siblings got their first choices, you got sloppy seconds”. You can wallow in that for ten seconds, but then practicality has to jump in. You are a parent; you have responsibilities; you can’t get sucked in to the sibling rivalry. You didn’t ask for your business to suffer financially. I’d frame it as “We do our best as a family to support EVERYONE’s educational opportunities to the best of our ability” and refuse to go down that road in any granular way. First, because it doesn’t magically make an extra 10K show up in your checking account. Second, because it pits you and your spouse against your D as the villains in this drama, which you most assuredly are not. And third- and most important- that narrative is what keeps your D from falling in love with another, more affordable option.

I am not of the “there is only one dream school” philosophy. Kids flourish in all kinds of places, whether it was their first, second or 12th choice. There is no dream school just like there is no dream spouse or dream house or dream job. All of adulthood involves trade-offs.

No college is so perfect that it’s head and shoulders above other educational options.

Does your D have a sure fire safety that you can afford comfortably???

13

You have never applied for aid before and now you have two in college. Did you apply for aid for next year for the other child who is in college? You may be eligible for some now, and that may bring your total expenditures down to a level where you are more comfortable.

14

I’m also in the camp of being upfront with your child now. I would be honest and say that you just learned that there may be a difference with the NPC and the actual aid package. Better your child is emotionally prepared now.

I firmly agree with everything posted by @blossom.

15

I understand the hardest part of this is being fair and giving equally to each of your kids. We have many, and that is super important to us. That’s what kept me grinding through activities, volunteering, or supporting for the younger ones. I would ask myself if I would have done xyz for the oldest, and I knew the answer, so off I went. We viewed college the same way, opportunity/choices had to be comparable/equal. But it’s hard for parents to deny #1 kid the best realizing they need to pace it out for all. Many find yourself where you are, wanting to keep it equal. So I totally get your struggle. You have to do what is best for you and you ideals/goals. Whether that involves borrowing or not is up to you. There’s plenty of people that will do anything, and I mean anything, for their kids to attend a certain school and there are others that may take a different and more practical approach - luckily we are free to make those choices.

All you can do is get the decision and then ask the school if you can delay your decision as you get your business finances in order using that time to see how it plays out with other options. In the meantime, be looking at virtues of other schools and don’t do any more pumping up of this one. Wish you the best.

16

I certainly wouldn’t fault your thinking for that. You ran the NPC. You haven’t done anything wrong.

I think the thing to do is wait and see if she gets in, see what the aid offer is, and make sure she has completed all her other applications including to a definitely affordable college.

If the aid offer isn’t enough, deal with that then. But at least she has plan B ready go.

17

I agree with being upfront/setting expectations with your kid and then seeing what they come up with.
If the school comes up short, you can try to buy time from them and try to negotiate.

Have a couple of backup plans in case. Talk up a couple of the other schools with your kid and point out the benefits so, if the ED school doesn’t come through, he can still be excited about going somewhere else.

I feel for you. My circumstances could also probably make the NPC an unreliable indicator. It can be stressful, but just see how it plays out, and then you can make an educated decision that is agreeable to everyone in your family.

Wishing your kid the best. I hope that it works out at the ED school and that they give you $$$ to make it affordable for your family. Good luck!

18

Yes, the older sibling that is already in college has applied for financial aid now (for next year) for the first time. At first, I thought this might be a savior in that maybe we would find out what the aid was and even though it’s a different college, then at least have some idea of a range that both kids’ financial aid awards would be, based on the older sibling’s award. But when I checked with the older sibling’s college re: when they would tell us the (currently already in college)'s siblings financial aid for next year (which we applied for before their January 1 deadline for that) , they said that continuing students don’t get told their aid awards till MAY 1 !! So no help at all !!! And way later than I ever imagined, making no sense to me!!!

19

This isn’t going to be a popular comment.

If your child receives an ED 2 acceptance to a college that is unaffordable…it might as well be a rejection.

So what if the odds of getting accepted are better in the ED round. Your odds of getting more aid are NOT increased in the ED round.

Please…be up front with your student. If the money isn’t forthcoming, they will have to decline the acceptance…unless you are prepared to pay the costs to attend.

20

How many years will there be two in college?