Texts aren’t always quick and reliable as texts sometimes got delayed by as much as two days in my experience and those of several friends.
There’s also the factor that some offices/industries are structured in such a manner that one may not be able to access one’s cellphone to even check messages/texts for hours at a time.
One example is some office environments I’ve worked in where due to client confidentiality/information security considerations…we all had to check in our personal cellphones and electronics before proceeding into the office and could only access them on our lunch/other breaks well outside the office. This means we may not be able to check personal phones/text messages for several hours at a stretch…and use of office computers/phones for personal calls/texts was completely verboten.
Another is an ex-GF who could only check her cell on her lunch hour because her work area in a hospital is located so far underground that there’s no cell reception. And she could be out of contact for as much as 8+ hours at a stretch considering the nature of her job.
There’s also the factor expectations of being available 24/7 to check/answer texts at a moment’s notice can be a serious productivity killer in many professional/office environments.
@doschicos My emails go out to girls 13 years old and up and parents. This parent has two young daughters. Parents must sign for cookie orders because they are financially responsible for them also a parent must accompany their child at a cookie booth even if the girl is 18 (don’t even get me started on that!)
@CTmom2018 I didn’t actually raise my voice but I did used a very stern tone.
@lostaccount@sseamom I don’t often use a cell phone it’s usually in the car since I only use it when I’m away from home and I think it cost money to txt, so no I don’t txt. Cell phone coverage in my are area is intermittent, calls drop and break up d reports some time text messages do not always come through. Maybe if we lived in the city were there is better coverage I’d rely on it more. I have one family that lives in an area that doesn’t have internet at all so I always call her and if she’s not home I leave her a message and she calls me. If she has a phone that she can text on shouldn’t she be able call on that phone too? I really don’t think I’m being unreasonable about not texting. If she wants to be called instead of emailed I have no problem with that. This is her third year her girls are selling cookies with us and she has never mentioned having an issue with email before.
@nottelling I don’t know what a “chair of the cookie drive” is but my daughter wants as little to do with cookies as possible! Here parents volunteer to be the cookie mom or dad for the troop, in my case two troop and the unattached girls. Cookie moms have to be background checked and sign documents stating that they are responsible for the cookies and money girls can not take on this responsibility in our council.
Thanks for all the replies!
When I see her today I will apologize for my tone but I’ll also, more politely, reiterate that she really needs to contact me and not my daughter. I’ll also ask her if she’d prefer a call instead of email.
Eek. I do think you overreacted a bit, but for you to call the cell she just texted from and then she didn’t pick up? She sounds passive aggressive. I wouldn’t spend too much time worrying about her.
When I see her, I would apologize for sounding so frustrated but explain (not too much) that dd is busy with her own stuff and doesn’t have time to be a go between on the cookie orders. Also, concede that you know most people rely on texting but that you find e-mail is easier when trying to coordinate XX people. Reiterate that if she really doesn’t like e-mail she always can call you. And then let it be.
(As an aside, if you prefer e-mail, there’s nothing wrong with that and you are no more wrong to insist on e-mail than she is to insist on text. The difference is that you have stepped up to do the hard work of being the coordinator and if she doesn’t like the system she’s free to take it over next year and text away. I’m surprised some people are acting like you are only taking orders via carrier pigeon!)
Perhaps it would have been better if DD said “you need to e-mail or call mom”. But I wouldn’t apologize. She knew the form of communication and ignored it. You could have ignored the texts. She has a cell phone–she can call. She read the e-mail–all she needed to do was hit reply.
If it was an emergency change–cookies are not emergencies.Most likely she just wanted to make sure you got the message–perhaps since she doesn’t check her e-mail often she thinks you don’t either.
E-mail leaves a good paper trail and is easy to organize in folders.
And can be sent by phone also as easily as texting. The lady could’ve e-mailed from her phone. No need to text.
And I am SHOUTING at the people who thought you should text cookie orders. Before they say that, they have to tell me how many cookie booths they have run. How many troop cookie sales have they run? Until you know what you are talking about, you shouldn’t talk IM(not so)HO. The paperwork is a nightmare. I would never trust texts either.
I have done the job of cookie mom, cookie booths, cookie cupboard (gathering place for the leaders to pick up their cookies.) All are hard jobs made harder by the _)(@#$% special snowflakes that can’t email or read email, or expect me to open my garage 24x7.
After doing it a couple of years, I got really good at boundaries. and mean about people crossing (or attempting to) them.
That said, when people followed my dates and times and were polite, I accomodated. But try to bully me, you’d be out in the cold. And to loop my daughter in? WTH? Actually, I did it after my daughter was gone to college, too, so NO she shouldn’t/wouldn’t/couldn’t help.
Tell that special snowflake to go talk to the cookie manager at the scout house.
3scoutsmom…I am answering as a troop leader and wife of a former community cookie MANager. this is a thoroughly thankless job and one, according to GSUSA must be taken on by an adult. I would never accept orders by text. I probably would not accept orders via email, looking back at my experiences. In my troop(s), the actual paper order form must be turned in. then i would photocopy it…so we are all crystal clear on what product is changing hands. I have seen parents ignore instructions and it ain’t pretty. After three years, this mom should know better. I understand your frustration completely and although you could apologize for your tone, you probably don’t need to.
For the amount of money the girls actually make in our council selling cookies, it’s a waste of time IMO, but the selling experience, especially for younger scouts, is a good one. And to your daughter, sorry she “got the broken popsicle stick” if you know that old saying about leader’s daughters…
Just to pile on - unless something has changed radically in the Girl Scout organization, the cookie mom/parent (or Troop Cookie Chair) is always an adult, not a girl member, even the girl is over 18. It’s a pain but it’s a rule, at least in my old council.
@Youdon’tsay I think you hit the nail on the head. Since she had been just been texting and didn’t answer the phone she had been texting from … that’s when I let my frustration get the best of me, would she have answered the phone I’m sure things would have gone differently and yes I’m sure that there are many explanations to why she didn’t answer the phone but that was the thing that pushed me over the edge.
Completely unrelated to the cookie order issue, I’m always a little surprised by people who don’t have or use cell phones and are proud of it. I am far from a helicopter mom, but all three of my kids at one time or another has called me in an emergency when I was not home and only because I had a cell phone with me was I able to help them. I’ve also had calls from my youngest D’s school for something truly important and I shudder to think of what might have happened had I not been reachable. Yes, we all fill out the yellow cards with a long list of alternate emergency names and numbers. But those people are not my kids’ parents and I’d rather be the one called.
And this is why I am very glad my daughter quit being a Girl Scout in 6th grade. I have never understood the so-called link between selling sugar door to door and “character development.” Perhaps such a link exists for those who are naturally good at sales, but most people aren’t good at sales and can learn character some other way.
And I fail to see how anything that requires such a high level of parental involvement can really be called a Girl Scout activity. The cookie sale’s only merit, as far as I can see, is to fund the organization and allow disadvantaged girls to participate. There has got to be a better way to do that than force some poor mother to become a temporary accountant and saleswoman and drive herself nuts. Rant over.
Yes, you did overreact, though your frustration was understandable. Apologize for your rudeness, but firmly state that “NO orders will ever be accepted by text because as a medium of communication, it is too error prone and we certainly want those cookie orders to be correct. Thank you for understanding.”
As someone who bought three boxes last week for a care package for ds2, let me add my thanks to all the cookies moms and dads out there!
And my favorite saying when my kids were in school and I was elbow deep in this stuff was “To bitch is to volunteer.” I mainly said it to myself so that when I was tempted to complain about something I would remember to keep my trap shut unless I felt like doing it better myself.
I am a bit late to this but as a former “cookie mom” i am with you 1,00% on this. I do not think that you overreacted and I do not think that you are in the wrong. I might just apologize if it came off as abrupt when I met the mom but I would also remind her of the communication channels that have been set up.
Also, for others on here to think that you should be using your cell phone to take and send texts and calls seems crazy to me. If you are not comfortable or able to reliably communicate with your cell phone that should be of no issue to anyone else. The OP provided multiple other reliable ways to communicate If they choose to email you from their cell phone – have at it. If they choose to call you from their cell phone – go for it… For anyone to assume or imply that she is in the wrong for not wishing to communicate in that way is just wrong. I know that I can not contact many of my friends on their cells (teachers, nurses, physical therapists, bus drivers, etc…) Just because it is a convenient time for me to be reaching out, does not mean it is a convenient time for them to be responding at that minute-- I also do not keep my phone on my 24/7 and nor do my children. FWIW my children are not permitted to have their phones on them at dinner or when they are entertaining relatives (actually older relatives - grandparents/aunts etc…). If there is an emergency then the other person will pick up the phone and call. If not, it can wait until they are finished and available.
I think of apologizing as a way to make the other mom feel less defensive, not because OP made some huge error. Just easier to catch a fly with honey thing …
Decades ago I was a cookie mom and eventually a regional cookies manager – responsible for over 20 cookie moms in my region. It IS a thankless job and piles of paperwork that must balance exactly – staying organized is critical.
I support the OP’s preferences re communication of orders, etc. One of the things I really like about e-mail is the paper trail, file folders, etc.
Yet I agree that the D should just have texted back, “Can’t take orders, etc. for Mom, please deal directly with her.” Copy and paste whenever needed. Then mom would not have had to vent.
I think she could make a semi-apology/explanation – “Sorry for my venting, but … . Thanks for your anticipated cooperation.”
Blessings to anyone who takes on this stuff. (The cookie moms I met were lovely people.)
I think that there might be a bit of a generation gap here. But I loathe group texts and although I do text, I see its shortcoming and wonder why people think the OP should compromise instead of the texter.
My H only texts when he has to. Thinks it is one of the most annoying ways to communicate.
I have a cell phone and texts show up on my laptop, but I were one of the other mothers I’d be seriously irritated to be included in a text conversation that included 14 people. No, I wouldn’t care how many cookies other people want. I’d just want to get my order in. To have my phone buzzing every 5 minutes with other people’s responses would drive me batty.
As the organizer I wouldn’t want to be hunting through multiple text strings to find the one response I need. On email all I have to do is look for the subject line I sent something out under, e.g., “Cookie orders”. I’m also not going to send out 13 separate texts just to save people from having to get everyone else’s response.
I’m surprised some people are acting like you are only taking orders via carrier pigeon!)