different types of friends

College Essays
1

<p>I wrote this essay in 30 minutes. I welcome your constructive criticisms.</p>

<p>Humans are social creatures and if we want to survive on this planet, it is of crucial importance that we communicate and help each other. We might face people who we feel we have much in common with them and we enjoy their companionship and come to our assistance in critical situations. So we decide to make friends with them, However humans are sophisticated creatures and each one has his/her own characteristics and this will create complexities in a relationship. That is why we have different types of friends with different capabilities and tastes. I classify them into three major categories: fair-weather friends, intellectual friends and loyal friends.</p>

<p>Fair-weather friends are ones who hang out with you when things are going well for you but leave you alone at the first sign of trouble. They are self centered and they only want to take advantage of you. It goes without saying that they are pseudo-friends.</p>

<p>Intellectual friends are ones who are helpful and you can take advice from them. They are wise and always come up with correct solutions. They provide you useful information, help you think clearly, weigh your choices and make correct decisions when you are at a crossroads. However they are not necessarily devoted friends and they are not always there for you to listen to you and cheer you up when you are in difficlutlies.</p>

<p>Loyal friends are ones who are always available for you and try to help you in a way. They are compassionate and caring people and are always there for you to listen to you and you can discuss your feelings and thoughts openly with them. However it does not mean they are smart and knowledgeable people and are able to get you out of trouble. On the contrary, they can create problems for you with their unwanted words and actions. Unfortunately compassionate and caring people can be ignorant. So, combination of loyalty and wisdom can make someone a great friend.</p>

<p>We need to differentiate between our friends and value our loyal and intellectual friends and get rid of fair-weather friends. We spend a long time with our friends and they affect our way of thinking and have a huge impact on our life. It is vital to make friends with people who we can form a relationship based on mutual respect. A relationship which both sides can benefit from it.</p>

2

<p>Honestly, it reads like a school assignment, not a college essay. </p>

<p>Your essay contains the word “we” 20 times. A college essay, no matter what the topic, should be about YOU – your beliefs, your hopes, your dreams, your desires! It’s called a personal statement for a reason – it needs to be personal. What you have written is too general. Truthfully, any rising senior in high school could have written it. And while that’s fine for class, it’s not going to make you stand out in the college application process. After reading your essay, I haven’t learned anything personal about you; I don’t know what makes you different from another applicant. </p>

<p>My advice: Throw this essay away and try again. And next time, DO NOT post your essay on the internet, as it just invites plagiarism. Always offer to private message (PM) your essay to someone on CC.</p>

3

<p>Honestly, this is an English class assignment. I am fully aware this is not a great essay but I need to know my mistakes.</p>

<p>I think you should explain more about my mistakes. I need details. All those things I wrote about different types of friends and explained each of them were my own beliefs. Do I have to start my sentences with “I believe…” to make it clear i m talking about my beliefs? I m trying to point out to facts and support my ideas. This essay is about different types of friends so I dont see any reason to talk about personal things. You said I used word “We” too much. Please be specific and helpful. For example my first line: Humans are social creatures and if we want to survive on this planet… What do you suggest that I use instead of we in this sentence? Please be clear and and suggest something. Cross out each sentence which seems wrong to you and make a suggestion. Thanks</p>

4

<p>This is a forum for college essay help, NOT an English Class Help Desk. Maybe another poster can help you out.</p>

5

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<p>Lord, no. (Saying “I believe” in front of something you wrote is redundant. Presumably you wouldn’t write something if you didn’t believe it.)</p>

<p>A bunch of generalizations with “I believe” in front of them is still a bunch of generalizations. It still wouldn’t be a personal essay. </p>

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<p>What kind of school do you go to where they have you write things like this instead of analytical papers with citations and such?</p>

6

<p>I don’t get at all how this could even be perceived as a college essay… it really has absolutely nothing to do about you. New topic time!</p>

7

<p>It is not school. I am going to an English institute this summer.</p>

8

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<p>The reason your essay is problematic has nothing to do with your writing – it’s the premise. You are viewing friendship through a 1950’s prism. I don’t know about you, but in 2013, my loyal friends, intellectual friends, and fair-weather friends are all there on facebook with me – and I can communicate with them as often, or as little, as I like. So, there’s no need to get rid of any of them. Hence, your essay falls flat. I agree with cakebatter: New Topic Time!</p>

9

<p>This section is meant for college application essays, not for help in writing papers in general…</p>

10

<p>@gibby What you said about Facebook is irrelevant. Friendships are not restricted to Facebook. You see a lot of your friends everyday at school, work etc. Since fair-weather friends pretend to be your friends and want to take advantage of you, You should end your relationship with them since they can harm you. Try to be more helpful in those New Topics.</p>

<p>@BrownParent I got it.This was mentioned a few times.</p>

11

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<p>People are more nuanced than that.</p>