Divored and dating?

<p>Anyone else divorced and dating? Let's dish ladies!</p>

<p>My latest issue: dating a guy who is overall great but he dresses terribly. Should I ignore this or attempt to change his style?</p>

<p>Let's see... guy = great, but his clothes = terrible.</p>

<p>Are you dating the guy or his clothes?</p>

<p>My H wears the same clothes as he did when I met him.
flannel- tshirts- and levi 501's.
Same size basically too.
Occasionally I will buy something from JCrew for him, but if he is low maintenance , who am I to complain?</p>

<p>Terrible is probably in the eye of the beholder- what are we talking about?
Speedos to mass?</p>

<p>So you're saying without his clothes he's great?</p>

<p>setting a bookmark.</p>

<p>ya know what they say- a good man is hard to find ( or was it the other way around?)</p>

<p>This is making me laugh out loud. </p>

<p>A former colleague was dating a fellow, who just did not please her with his style. Her complaint......he showed up for a date with a spot of baby formula on his collar (he was a single parent with custody of his children). This turned her off. Sigh.......</p>

<p>My husband dressed in old Disney t-shirts, shaggy hair, and soccer shorts when I met him... Now, he sports short hair, an adorable goatee, and we go browse ties and suits at Ermenegildo Zegna. "What have you done to me?! This is all your fault!" he says, with regard to his new and expensive tastes in clothing. I really didn't make him this way... I argue that perhaps I unlocked something latent, but I couldn't change the guy if I tried.</p>

<p>You can hope for some untapped well of fashion deep inside his mind, though, since they apparently actually exist. :)</p>

<p>*Speedos to mass? *</p>

<p>Now, that might fill the pews! LOL</p>

<p>I think wearing Speedos to Mass probably wins as being the most succinctly inappropriate possibility for a dressing snafu, ever!</p>

Should I ignore this or attempt to change his style?


<p>Lather, rinse, repeat</p>

<p>Ok....confession time....</p>

<p>When I met my H, he was a stereotypical horribly dressed engineer (of the worse variety). Every item of clothes either had a major stain on it or had a seam that was held together with a safety pin (seriously). </p>

<p>I (of course) was always fashionable dressed. Darn, lack of humility, got more to confess now...</p>

<p>Ok...we were "set up" by a mutual friend who warned me about his clothes. Well, I was upfront with him and we threw out ALL of his clothes and started from scratch. </p>

<p>When I met his family the following Christmas, his sisters were soooooo very grateful. LOL</p>

<p>(Our 25th wedding anniversary was this month! )</p>

<p>So, if you think this guy wants to be with you, he'll be willing to change his wardrobe. However, don't wait too long. Women have the most power over such things during the early stages when the guy is moving mountains to impress you. ;)</p>

<p>Well, I'm definitely divorced, but I'm not dating. (The last time I went out on a date with someone was, I believe, in approximately September 1986.) I'll takes notes on this thread, though, just in case that ever changes!</p>

<p>A family member started dating someone who is divorced and has 2 children about 3 years ago. They just got engaged and we are going out dinner to celebrate this weekend.</p>

<p>So, I guess you may be wondering what the best approach should be in regards to getting him to change his wardrobe...</p>

<p>Well, depending on his personality and your relationship with him....</p>

<p>1) You could buy him a new outfit, have him try it on, and then rave how much you like it and how he needs a lot more clothes like that. (or take him out and buy him an outfit) Anyway, if he wears the new outfit and notices that other people give him "more pleasant" feedback, that may be enough to encourage him to dump the rest of his clothes. (Be sure to pick out an outfit that really flatters his coloring and body shape.)</p>

<p>2) You could just outright tell him that he needs some caring help with his wardrobe. (he may be color blind! If so, then not only will he need help with clothing selection, but you may need to make him a little chart (maybe with photos) showing him what shirt goes with what pants.) My H is color-blind, so clothes matching is a real problem for him.</p>

<p>What other methods might work?</p>

<p>Don't change his clothes. Keep dating him and let him be. I got my first love -- my college boyfriend -- to dress better, and then he dumped me for another girl. Since many women can't see beyond the clothes, let your boyfriend dress badly. :)</p>


<p>Cherish him as he is. Occasionally buy him piece of clothing, and encourage him to wear it when you are going out. Sometimes they want guidance, sometimes it is their face to the world and want to be accepted just as they are.</p>

<p>meanwhile, enjoy yourself</p>

<p>regarding speedos at Mass
My son is still traumatized by the image of a young, but somewhat rotund South American priest in a speedo during an excursion to the coast while on a service trip in Jamaica.</p>

<p>*k...we were "set up" by a mutual friend who warned me about his clothes. Well, I was upfront with him and we threw out ALL of his clothes and started from scratch. *</p>

<p>Remember the scene in * It's Complicated* where Streep was advising Martin on his wardrobe? ( through the webcams on their laptops in their respective homes)
After Baldwin joined the picture ( I was watching it on my laptop in bed with headphones), I was laughing so hard, my H woke up and asked me what was the matter.</p>

<p>Be wary of the urge to change him. When I first met my husband he dressed like EK's -- jeans, T-shirts and flannel shirts. I on the other hand was a fashion plate. Determined to change him, I took him shopping. Thirty years later my closet is full of jeans, t-shirts and flannel shirts!</p>