<p>Please document his behavior as it occurs, even if you don’t go to the police. Either in a diary, or in an email, or anything that has a date stamp. That will go a long way towards protecting her if indeed his behavior escalates.</p>
<p>I’m praying for you and your d; I’d be a nervous wreck by now if she were mine!</p>
<p>Anyone who opens a PayPal account is offered a PayPal credit card. I think it is important to find out who administers the PayPal cards (Chase, CapitolOne etc) and call to find out if there is a card in your daughters name. If D calls and asks for security/fraud dept at the card company they will help determine if anyone with her name/DOB/SSN has opened an account.</p>
<p>sax,
Just to add a little extra advice. Monitoring behavior is fine but it’s important to come up with a plan of action/approach that doesn’t immediately involve going to the police (unless necessary). Sometimes certain people will thrive on the attention and involvement of police intervention & the further, dramatic connection it brings to the person they are interested in (e.g. seeing her name on a complaint against him). Moreover, the idea that a restraining order will protect a woman is often – unfortunately–somewhat illusory. </p>
<p>I’ve found the approach to discourage guys varies on where in the scale of normalcy he falls. In my experience, some normal guys (i.e. non-stalker but just very, very persistant) will only be completely discouraged by saying “I’m seriously seeing someone else.” Any other explanation (“I’m not ready for a rel’p now…I don’t think we are right…etc.”) leave open a window through which he thinks he can change your mind. The presence of another guy in the picture is sometimes the only thing that will cut it off.</p>
<p>With guys in the slightly more, say, problematic, range–it’s important to be calm, polite and very respectful of them when saying “no, not now, not ever.” Often these guys are provoked by the perceived disrespect in a rejection and can be calmed down by being treated firmely, yet very politely and respectfully (even if your thoughts are going in a completely different direction).</p>
<p>Maybe more advice than you needed…hope it’s helpful.</p>