Do you dislike your child's choice?

<p>As I ready all these very informative threads (thank you all!!!), I was wondering if any of you really dislike the college your child has fallen in love with? </p>

<p>We've visited quite a few colleges this summer and I am determined to allow my son to make his decision about environment since he is the one who will be living there for the next 4 yrs. not me. But it amazes how different his perspecitive about a college and mine can be. </p>

<p>So, all you more experienced, been-there-done-that folks, did you like the college your child chose?</p>

<p>I'll bite:
My older daughter is a rising junior in college; she chose her school based on the reputation of the major she was interested in rather than the entire college experience; I hated her choice then, and I'm not too thrilled with it now....
but my pocketbook LOVES it; she received a large merit scholarship from the school she is attending.....</p>

<p>I absolutely love my younger daughter's 1st, 2nd and 3rd choices for her.....so I guess one out of two ain't bad......</p>

<p>I was very happy with how things turned out. Both DD1 and 2 were NMFs and each of their first choice schools (LACs) were Need Based aid only. They were both waitlisted and went to their second choices with some nice scholarships. Both good schools that fit them, and we are all happy.</p>

<p>S is at my & H's alma mater. Can't complain about that, haha.</p>

<p>I love the college D has chosen. It is a wonderful school in general, and a great fit for her in particular. But I hate that it's 750 miles away.</p>

<p>My daughter (now a rising Sr) wanted an urban art school and didn't care about traditional campus life. I, on the other hand, would have preferred a more traditional campus, at a LAC or U with a good art program. Most of the art schools were EA or rolling, so by December she was happy to settle with 1 of the 3 schools she had applied and was accepted to. I encouraged her to apply to a couple more, and made sure there were some non-art schools in the mix. I felt that she may feel one way in December but by May 1 she may have a change of heart.</p>

<p>Needless to say, she didn't have a change of heart, and went with what she wanted. She has no regrets. Overall I think it worked out fine, but I kind of feel bad she never had a 'real' campus experience. The only time she gave that any thought was 2 years later when she came with us to drop my son off at U Del, and as we drove into the campus she let out a big "wow", and for a brief moment admitted she thought maybe she did miss something.</p>

<p>Because my D is vocal performance, I was doing college research before she was in 10th grade, looking for summer programs, finding out how conservatories worked, etc. Early on, I felt like I had found a school that matched her needs in every way. I never said anything to her because I was afraid that because I liked it, she would oppose it. (that was fairly common in 9th and 10th grades) However, here we are now, packing to go to the school that I discovered almost 4 years ago. She made her list of schools, visited, interviewed students/teachers and decided this school was her first choice. Now she can't wait to get there, and we got a scholarship package that meets our needs. Everybody wins.</p>

<p>I was shocked that my son, who was always at odds with me as a teenager, chose and loves my flagship alma mater. A large campus that gives him many different experiences than I had along with the decades of changes.</p>

<p>I love ds's choice. In fact, I was the one who first brought it to his attention (after cc brought it to my attention). I wish it weren't so far away, but even that feels like a big adventure.</p>

<p>Well it is encouraging to hear that there can be harmony. I have been reading the thread about immediate disliking a school. We have only had that at one school but we also haven't had DS "fall in love" and "know this was the right place for him" with any school. I know which one I would pick but he isn't there yet. :-)</p>

<p>I don't dislike my son's choice. There are a lot of things that are good about it. In fact, I am liking it more every day.</p>

<p>There was a school that I liked equally, and I do not know how my son made his decision so quickly. The other school is ranked much higher and seems to send more kids to grad school, the financial package was slightly (I do mean slightly) better, and it is much closer to home.</p>

<p>The school my son chose has a stronger department for what he thinks he might want than the school I was referring to above, the area around the school is really better than any of the schools he could pick from (being limited by cost), and he got the most personalized attention during the "courting season" from the school which he chose to attend. That all said, this was always a safety school for my son, but he is still not in the top 10%. I'd say he is conservatively within the top 25-30%. BTW, they have continued to show wonderful personalized attention even after he sent in a deposit, and they are still continuing to offer personal attention to him. So far, I am thrilled with the attention that he is receiving.</p>

<p>DH hated S1's dream school and now even with S1 a rising senior, DH still hates it. Me? Meh, I don't really think of it that way. S1 loves it, has done well academically, is super-involved in campus life, known (in a good way) by the administration and has had a terrific fraternity experience. It really was the absolutely correct choice for him, and he made the choice on his own.</p>

<p>Many friends and family members questioned son's decision to attend Virginia Tech. It was the best decision he made and he has not regretted it at all. It was hard at first as we felt we had to defend his decision. It was his first choice school, so we are glad he went.</p>

<p>Virginia Tech suffered because of the tragedy there a few years ago- a reason I presume your family and friends were against it. I'm glad it has overcome that and was able to offer a good experience for your son and others.</p>

<p>My parents love my first-choice school (which I will be attending) because it's close to home. Much, much closer to home than my second and third choices, which they did not love.</p>

<p>I was very pleased with all my kids' college choices, but here's a story of my D's good friend:</p>

<p>Friend's mother wanted her to go to a conservative Christian college, only. Father wasn't too involved, but he wanted her to go to a "name" school. Friend wound up at NYU, which has a name, but certainly would not be considered conservative, or Christian. After a year, no one was happy. She's at Flagship State U now and doing well.</p>

<p>I had never even heard of the school my son will be attending until he applied. He was focusing on smaller liberal arts colleges on the east coast with engineering. He was also accepted to my alma mater UCLA which I knew was a terrible fit for him. I was pulling for UCSD until we made a trip back east to visit colleges where he was accepted. The we all fell in love with the school. I hope he can survive the winter though!</p>

<p>My D had a college high on her list that DH and I did not feel was a good match for her. We did not percieve the academics or social scene in the same way, and we did not value the things she really liked about the school. She knew how we felt. But we also made it clear it was her decision, we would support her in her choice, we would not say you cannot go. If we had, she might have dug her heels in just to be oppositional and prove to us that we did not know what was best for her.</p>

<p>I took her to the admitted student's day in April. Suddenly she realize that maybe we were not complete fools, and that maybe it was not exactly the place she thought it was. She will attend a different school next year. One we all like - so I guess a happy ending. </p>

<p>@Momofzach - it is a long road. They fall in and out of love with different schools for different, and sometimes silly reasons. So sit tight, it may be that your perspectives begin to converge over time.</p>

<p>I think my parents liked my choice-a 3rd tier flagship- more than I did-and I liked it! Both my brother and I disliked their alma matter, though.</p>

<p>I don't really think my parents care either way. I know they don't like coming to visit because the traffic stresses them out and that is about the extent of things.</p>

<p>I am sort of filling in the best I can as the parental figure for my sister's college search, she's a rising HS senior, and I completely hate where she wants to go. I am arranging to bring her on a visit and keeping my mouth shut, if she still likes it I'll be happy for her. We are just used to much safer surroundings and I can't help but feel that the school is beneath her academically, I have a hard time believing she'll really be comfortable there, but if she checks it out and is comfortable then more power to her.</p>

<p>Ten years ago I ignorantly said that the one school I would not want my daughters to attend was Brown. No requirements; no grades; drugs? Oh my! I said it without really knowing anything about Brown and as a parent of a grade-schooler.</p>

<p>Now DD1 is a rising sophomore at Brown and I couldn't be happier for her.</p>