I don’t care if kids or adults who want to play dodgeball play dodgeball, provided that in the case of children, care is taken to avoid head shots with balls other than nerf balls. I’m demonizing organized and required bullying, not voluntary game-playing.
I am opposed to bullying, but dodgeball was not a bullying event when I was growing up. In fact, I don’t think we played it past 6th grade. We had fun red rubber balls and we looked forward to dodgeball, both organized as part of school and at recess. If you were bad at it, you got hit early on and you were out. It was never a big deal. I can not recall anyone, nerdy/scrawny or not, objecting to dodgeball. I see this as a snowflake thing. I saw plenty of bullying going on at my son’s elite boys’ private school and my son was actually expelled for defending himself against a much larger kid who had pinned him down and was hurting him. Dodgeball was never one of the issues there, either.
It was a mandatory PE activity at my school long long ago. The only choice was hitting someone with a ball (a really hard ball) or getting hit by a ball. Not a good life lesson imho. I hope that isn’t the type society we want to model for our children.
Did you go to a school where a child objecting to any required part of elementary school would have had any effect? Was there even any way to object? At my school, reading and math and history and gym were required and everyone had to do them. I never “objected” to any part of elementary school, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t hate it. It just means I knew I didn’t get to object.
Let me rephrase this: Are you saying we are lying when we describe our experiences with dodgeball? You think that a kid who hated dodgeball would have, at the time, gone up to you, a person who enjoyed it, and announced that she hated it? Would you have been any more sympathetic then than you are now?
I.was.bullied
Teachers were complicit. There was only one teacher who recognized it, and she did her best, but it didn’t change.
I didn’t even tell my parents how awful it was
I’m happy that there are people - parents and children - who have positive memories of school and PE.
I am not a snowflake and am disappointed in those who think my treatment at the hands of horrible children of horrible parents was somehow voluntary on my part. Reporting others’ behavior 40-50 years ago was not done.
I have gone through a lot in my life and I consider myself a strong, smart, empathetic woman who still has esteem issues. It took a lot of years and a lot of therapy to get to a point where my immediate response to people wasn’t fear. I did not allow my daughters or their friends to bully or exclude.
I hated Math and basically everything in school except PE and music, both of which I excelled at. I hated group projects. I was embarrassed when the smart kids put me down and made it apparent my help wasn’t needed. I purposely didn’t raise my hand to answer things because when I was wrong I was snickered at. I learned to sit in the back and keep my mouth shut. Was I oppressed or dehumanized by the smart kids? Is that any different than being hit by a dodgeball, hit from a volleyball being spiked or being kicked in the genitals in water polo? Nerds bullied me in their own ways but I don’t lament on it. I stand by saying to suck it up.
Me too. Bullies show up everywhere. But dodgeball doesn’t necessary equal bullying.
@CottonTales, you had some rotten experiences in the academic part of school, and I’m sorry.
Some other people had rotten experiences in PE, which is equally regrettable.
But only the ones who had those experiences in PE are likely to avoid physical activity for the rest of their lives, thus placing their health at risk.
I’ll play. We’ve seen lots of instances, Catholic Church, Sandusky, Boy Scouts, metoo, where children were hurt by adults. Having them be less trusting, staying away from certain people or situations, and more cautious around others could keep them safe.
I don’t think that’s what you learn @roethlisburger.
In bullying situations where being in the situation is mandatory (such as dodgeball as a required activity in PE), you don’t learn to stay away from people. You learn to tolerate being abused. That seems counterproductive.
Girls are bullied away from science and math. And not just by boys, but educators as well. You learn to deal with bullies.
Elementary school was a long time ago so my memory isn’t perfect, but I remember things that were bad experiences for me and for others- I had friends of all persuasions. I know kids were teased and bullied- especially since back then we didn’t know about things like “on the spectrum” or “autism” or “Asperger”. We just knew “strange” and “not like everyone else.” Dodgeball, in my memory, was something that we, collectively, enjoyed. Our bouncy red ball never hurt anyone. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses so short of mean behavior, I’m in the suck it up crowd.
You think being bullied by other children somehow HELPS kids learn to avoid being bullied and sexually assaulted by adults??? Being bullied trains kids to think that being hurt by other others is a normal part of life, it convinces them that no one will believe or help them if they tell, and it makes them MORE vulnerable to grooming by predators who give them attention and build their self esteem before abusing them.
I cannot even believe some of the things I’m reading on this thread!
I can’t believe that dodgeball is bullying. So I agree with you in that I can’t believe some of the things I am reading on this thread.
Dodgeball allows bullies to target and physically hurt other children, and get away with it. If a bully punched a kid in the stomach or smacked a kid in the face in the hallway, he would most likely end up in the principal’s office. Even if many schools don’t take physical assault as seriously as they should, at least I think everyone agrees that it should be taken seriously, and that it’s not OK to hurt another student, especially to the extent of breaking glasses, causing welts or bruises or bloody noses, or even knocking someone out.
But if you label it a “game,” suddenly those things are not only allowed, victims are required to present themselves to be pummeled, and then mocked as wimps or snowflakes if they object.
How is that not bullying?
My middle school dodgeball experience was coed, as well as bruising and expensive. I was accidentally hit in the face with a heavy ball (not one of those fun red lightweight ones) by the male PE teacher, when he tried to nail one of the class jerks for obnoxious behavior during the game. The jerky kid was standing in front of me and moved fast when he saw the ball heading our way. I was a geeky non-athletic girl with glasses who never moved fast, and certainly never expected the gym teacher to fire the ball into my face … surprise! Broke my glasses, which was the expensive part.
There are better ways for kids to learn life’s lessons.
CottonTales: I am sorry you were bullied by your classmates. That’s just unacceptable behavior. imho
My 10th grade algebra teacher ridiculed me to the class when I asked questions about the material. I’m pretty sure it was bullying. It certainly wasn’t a useful educational strategy or inspirational tool, at least in my case. It was the last math class I ever took. In my life. And that’s sad to me. I was sincerely interested in math, including algebra, even though I certainly had no aptitude and found it challenging.
I wasn’t bullied, but I vividly remember some poor little tiny kid getting pelted on the back as he covered his head with his hands. Hooray, fun game. That kid was bullied in the hallways, in the lunchroom, in class, everywhere. Dodgeball just provided another opportunity. So it’s not “bullying” on it’s own, no. But it is an “accepted” avenue for inflicting physical pain.
The first sentence here contradicts the third.
Girls are indeed bullied away from science and math. But when you say “you” learn to deal with bullies-- well, the girls who leave science and math did not learn to deal with bullies. Instead, the bullies drove them away from a field where they might have had considerable success. I oppose this bullying and its result. Don’t you?
It’s a situation that should be managed by proper supervision. If the teacher sees excessive force and bullying, there needs to be discipline. Eliminating a game that is fun for most is not the answer. We were made to sight sing in music class. That did not go well for many of us and sometimes there was teasing. Suck it up, buttercup. I guess jacks and ring around the rosey would be better options?