We adopted a dog last July when she was several months old. All we know about her background is that she was a stray in Detroit and that she was brought over from a high kill shelter to the shelter we adopted her from.
She has always been super rambunctious and loves everyone, but she’s also been a bit skittish. She is naturally extremely submissive- to the point that the very first thing she does when she comes up to anyone is roll over on her back and show her belly. When we first brought her home, she would pee almost every time a new person came in, but would still have a wagging tail and greet them with love. (She doesn’t pee anymore.)
She loves everyone… or did until recently. There is one man who has been over to our house twice that she barks at every time he gets up. The other was when she met my roommate’s brother and was just terrified of him for no apparent reason. She growled at him- the first time I’d ever heard her growl. She then snapped at him, but not in a vicious way- more in a warning way (if that makes sense… having worked around dogs for a long time, there is a difference between an “attack” snap and a “get away from me” snap). She didn’t attempt to bite him at all. I immediately got her to another room where she felt safe. It all happened very quick and it caught us off guard.
She’s been socialized pretty well and today a new person (female) came over and she was her normal, submissive but loving self.
She is also just an anxious dog in general. When we first adopted her, she would cry the whole time we were gone. She’s much better than that now but she still always needs to be touching someone or very, very close. (Although even this she’s gotten much better about. She will now go hang out in other rooms without us as long as she has a toy to keep her occupied.)
I think it’s not unusual for dogs to be afraid of certain people, often men (sorry, guys). My nonprofessional opinion is that dog owners should always introduce their dogs to new people and if there’s any sign of the dog being uncomfortable with the new person after a short “get to know you” period, respect that, and give the dog space from that person. Dog #2 in my family was extremely attached to us (my husband, me, and our daughters) but somewhat aloof with almost everyone else. Dog #3 is “my” dog; she’s very bonded to me, not so much with other family members, none of whom have spent nearly as much time with her as I have. She tends to approach strangers but is, I think, still somewhat anxious; she just expresses it differently than dog #2. She does warm up once she gets to know people. To reiterate, though, my main advice is to respect your dog’s likes and dislikes.
Not with my own dogs , but a couple of experiences with friends who adopted a pit bull that was found tied to a tree, starving and presumably bred for dog fights…also she had given birth to a litter of pups really early, vets thought at first heat…she likes women, but men not so much.
Our friends were parked outside our business with the car running and window open for a very brief time and a customer ( male ) walked by the open car window and the dog lunged at him…luckily nothing happened. The man didn’t even see that there was a dog in the car.
The dog also had a lot of separation anxiety when they fist got her and although she was crated, managed to hop the crate across the room far enough to chew up a table.
They also have another pit bull mix that was adopted really young and totally babied and is a sweet , sweet dog…but when they got the newer dog, they both went after a neighbor and one of them bit her…now they are trained with invisible fencing so no incidents
Also, my sister and her husband took in a german shepherd a little over a year ago from my nephew’s doggy daycare and training place…it really seems like she had been abused since she has a serious aversion to my BIL and any other man besides my nephew…loves my sister and loves the grandchildren , but very timid and fearful of men. I met her briefly and brought her a bribe ( bully stick ) She warmed up to me for a few minutes and loved the bully stick, until my BIL came through the door and then she retreated to her safe place.
If only rescued dogs could tell their story so we could understand and help them overcome their fears . and or aggressive behaviors
Yes, definitely, rosered. It just all happened quickly and none of us were prepared for her to do something like that. We’ll be much more attentive in the future to her body language.
She is definitely some sort of pit-mix (as are all of my family’s dogs for the last 15 or so years) but she is tiny for a pit. We think she is mixed with like jack russell or lab and something small. We’ve never had any dog bites with her or any of our other pits (fostered or adopted), but we’ve always been more careful with the ones who we suspected would have stranger anxiety (especially those who were abused). But it’s always been scared of everyone or scared of no one. She is our first “scared of a few” dog.
My main concern is just trying to keep her comfortable and trying to reduce her anxiety.
I cannot agree with this more! It breaks my heart to see the furbabies retreat out of fear. I can only imagine what they’ve been through (and unfortunately, sometimes I don’t even have to imagine as I see it or see the immediate aftereffects of it).
It seems to be all too common that rescue dogs are afraid of men, Is there anything that those two men have in common? Appearance? Height? Deep voices?
I tend to think that having something specific for the dog to do is generally a good response to redirect from undesirable behavior. As in, order the dog to sit and then lie down or wait until you release them instead of just saying “no” if they are jumping on someone or barking furiously or whatever. Maybe when your dog over reacts to a man you can call her to you, have them her at your side, and praise her. Maybe try having him give her some treats afterwards?
Good idea consolation. We had been working on getting her to sit and wait several feet from the door when people come in. She does a pretty good job when it’s any of the three of us who live here, but she is just super excited when it’s new people. We were putting her on a leash to try and train her with that (staying several feet away) but we (admittedly) got pretty lax. We should go back to that.
Nothing in common that I can think of. The one she barks at is tall, roomie’s brother is short. Neither facial hair. One glasses, one not.
Actually, now that I think about it, they both do have deep voices. I’m not sure if she heard either of their voices before she was scared of them but that’s definitely something they have in common. Mr R and my dad both have super deep voices, too, but she LOVES them (but she has been around them since pretty much day one).
It’s just hard to see our babies so anxious
I think I’m also going to bring this up to the vet when she goes in next time.
ETA: It also might be worth noting that she isn’t anxious around anything else. Fireworks, storms, etc don’t bug her in the least. She’s actually our first dog ever that isn’t terrified of loud noises lol. Go figure.
I have a dog that often becomes fearful during certain situations with us. He is rather introverted and highly skin sensitive. I have found that when he is worried, it helps to distract him with something like a tennis ball or a treat. I am not trying to reward the behavior but alter it. It seems to work when I remember to do it. Perhaps these men could toss a ball to her or do something she loves to do. Hope something works!
We had a great trainer work with us on our rescue dog. You want to do the OPPOSITE of what your reaction is in this case. You should have your dog on a leash, and walk over to the man as soon as he arrives and hand the leash to him and tell him to bring the dog as close to him as he can and totally ignore the dog. Your job is to walk away and act totally unconcerned; don’t talk to your dog or the person and move away. You are telling your dog that there is no cause for concern and that you are so unconcerned that your dog doesn’t need to feel concerned. Your dog will sniff the man and have to deal with his scent up close. He should not pay any attention at all to the dog.
It sounds crazy but it totally makes sense, and it works EVERY time with our dog - who would become crazy and bark and only stop when given treats, but would then start up again as soon as the treat was gone. Do NOT praise your dog - as that tells your dog that there was reason to be concerned in the first place. Nonchalance is where it’s at.
The trainer we worked with had years of experience, and was able to help us understand our dog’s anxiety from his perspective. It has made a big difference.
I’ve watched a lot of Victoria Stilwell’s show, “It’s Me or the Dog” and her training for stranger anxiety/fear is pretty close to what @anxiousmom described. IIRC she has the owner sit the dog down and make sure it’s calm before anyone comes in the front door; i.e. after the doorbell rings, calm the dog before opening the door. Then the visitor tosses a treat (or a toy) to the dog upon entering without otherwise engaging or making eye contact. Then everybody just sits down or goes about their business while ignoring the dog. That minimizes any kind of excitement that might get communicated to the dog, so it picks up on the vibe that there’s nothing much going on.
That’s what we were doing with the leash thing. Calm, not paying attention to the dog until all 4 paws were on the floor and no whining, etc. We will definitely go back to that. I feel like a bit of a furparent fail for not sticking with that. We’re not good at sticking to rules
Interesting idea, but it makes sense. I do know that some trainers use a target, such as a small rug or a towel, that they use for teaching long stays. They also use it to fix overexcited behavior at the door when people enter. They put the dog in a down stay on the target before opening the door, and then ignore the dog for several minutes before releasing them. By then, usually the “stranger” has been welcomed and the dog has calmed down. I don’t know if it works when there is fear or anxiety. And of course it means you have to have a solid down stay before using it!
My dog was scared of one of my son’s friends. His family had dogs so maybe it was the scent of one of them? She was also terrified of an electrician who came to do some work at our house. But then she got in his van and refused to come out! He was a smoker. I wondered if that had to do with it. Our dog was also a rescue and had spent some time wandering the streets. She had been lost for a period before we got her. (She was also not food motivated and often wary of taking food from strangers, like those dogless people who walk around with treats in their pocket.)
This isn’t about anxiety or aggression , but we had a friend that we nick named Dr Doolittle. He truly loved all animals , more than people.
For some reason we still don’t understand , our female dog , who happens to very food motivated didn’t like him. He came to our house to give me a rid to the airport and she not only wouldn’t greet him , but stood in front of me in a protective way and refused to take a treat from him. Poor guy was so upset. He was diabetic and we wondered if she sensed or smelled it, but that doesn’t explain why she didn’t like him.
Dogs can be mysterious creatures
have not read all of the posts. We pick the dog up and she is in our arms (21lbs) as the door is opened.
She is always ok with that and we only need it when she seems too! anything.
We have one neighbor who she does/did not like. I think I know why–this person never laughs! but the last time was ok–just as I was going to have the neighbor give the dog a treat but was not needed.
Is there anything that those two men have in common? Appearance? Height? Deep voices?