<p>I didn’t read from beginning, just caught the tail end. I guess our numbers have been “verified.”</p>
<p>But if the op is legit, she can address the issues eloquently explained in jmmom’s post #95 that may likely have contributed to the op getting the reaction it got. As soozie and MOWC and others said, the quick arrival and departure of a “new” poster here in the parents cafe adds to the questioning of the veracity of the post. Posters are guessing, and trying to fill in the pieces. Clarification would be helpful. And as thumper pointed out, she (the op) is reading the thread, so might as well help the puzzled posters understand whats up. Just sayin’</p>
<p>I received a message from the OP who chooses to no longer post on this thread. I think her disappearance from this thread should be honored and respected without further comment. There are many people who take offence to people bad mouthing them before they have even had a chance to talk (in this case write). How could some of you think this woman would want to hear what you have to say after you accused her of ■■■■■■■■, and telling false things. JMHO</p>
<p>There are many people who take offence to people bad mouthing them before they have even had a chance to talk (in this case write).</p>
<p>In this case, the responses were in reply to a first post that didn’t quite make sense.
Asking for further explanation isn’t " bad mouthing".</p>
<p>Well, momma-three, it’s good the OP has you to help her through this situation, since you are such a model of accepting advice graciously!</p>
<p>I can sympathize with the OP exiting the thread as well. She came for support, and instead, got the third degree. </p>
<p>As for the initial post causing suspicion, I don’t understand that. Many of us have friends who also use CC, and unfortunately, some of those friends have figured out our screen names. If I wanted to get advice from strangers, rather than friends, because I was embarrassed about a situation, I too would post under a different screen name, as even though CC is supposed to be anonymous, a lot of us are known to many under both our screen and our real names.</p>
<p>As to the 90 percent decrease in investment, a Tulane economics professor was on local talk radio this morning talking of an acquaintance whose stock had gone from either 20 or 50 dollars a share, I can’t remember which, but down to 96 cents a share. That drop occurred over a very short amount of time. Made me think of the OP when I heard that, that maybe she was one of the unfortunate ones to also have a similar stock. I’m not enough of a math whiz to figure out the percentage drop, but it’s still a drastic loss in my mind. </p>
<p>If the OP doesn’t want to post anymore, I respect that. But I hope that we can still give her and others in similar situations some emotional support.</p>
<p>I posted about a difficult topic last summer under a different name. Regular posters came out with hostility and judgments I never would have expected. Had I posted under my usual nom de plume, I think my dilemma would have been meet with a totally different attitude.</p>
<p>Any student who doesn’t include his/her parents in their college graduation plans…assuming the parents WANT to be included…has issues, in my opinion. It doesn’t matter how much money the student is earning at their first job, how much the parents paid for college, how much money was in college savings, how much was lost in the stock market, etc.</p>
<p>To NOT invite your parents to a college graduation that they WANT to attend is very mean spirited. This should be a time to bury the hatchet and become an ADULT…and welcome your family to celebrate with you.</p>
<p>So to the OP…all the “other” info is really irrelevant. I’m sorry for your situation and I hope that this can all be reconciled someday. This child will always be your son, and you his parents.</p>
<p>For future reference- when longtime readers want to get advice anon.,
all you have to do is say you have a new screen name for the question.
When posters have done that, even if the situation is complex/farfetched, those who respond respect their privacy.
When people don’t explain in that way- then there are more questions.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>It still does not make sense unless you buy one single stock for the whole retirement fund.</p>
<p>I saw nothing to indicate that the OP was a regular poster using a different account for anonymity. I viewed the OP as a brand new poster who happened to seek out this forum to raise this issue.
If for real, I hope the issues with the son eventually resolve.</p>
<p>I think I wouldn’t say I’m a regular poster who is using a new name. There are too many supersleuths out there who would figure me out! </p>
<p>Even if the son doesn’t bury the hatchet and come around and invite his parents to graduation, I hope they find it in their hearts to forgive him. Eventually, he’ll grow up and realize how much his parents mean to him. Maybe when he’s a parent himself. At that time, I hope they forgive him and welcome him with open arms back into their life.</p>
<p>Sending good thoughts to everyone going through graduation right now. It’s a momentous occasion in both parents’ and child’s life, and there’s bound to be a lot of stress involved and hurt feelings arising.</p>
<p>There is no way this story is for real – don’t buy too hard into this, guys.</p>
<p>Almost nobody lands something out of college with that kind of salary. Even from my graduating class, where everyone went to banks/hedge funds/top firms, working finance/accounting/engineering jobs and the like – most people saw salaries that were below 100k in total (maybe 45-70k base with a bonus maybe up to 10k on the high end).</p>
<p>Legend:<br>
You have tunnel listening skills.<br>
whether or not the salary is for real (does it occur to you that the kid wants to hurt his parents by saying “look how much I make and what failures you two are?”) this about the collapse of a relationship that has left at least the parental side devastated.</p>
<p>Have most of us seen children and or parents do horrible hurtful things to each other: Yes, it would be a rare thing that we haven;t encountered such pain. And I do think that the cloak of our identities makes us (sometimes) quite aggressive or passive aggressive saying things we would never say to acquaintances, much less friends.</p>
<p>I don’t appreciate the “tunnel” jab – that’s a bit uncalled for. </p>
<p>The original poster in this thread has 0 posts to the account, and the main post in this thread has lots of emotionally-stirring tidbits strung together for the sake of eliciting response. It’s a ■■■■■.</p>
<p>Sorry about the perceived jab. My point is that (again) look at the total post, not the salary.</p>
<p>Well, the rest of the story doesn’t make sense, either.</p>
<p>You don’t wind up with an EFC equal to the COA when you have low asset value (a $70k starter house in 1987) and income that isn’t equipped to handle more than three years of college.</p>
<p>Not only that, but 10 job offers? In the crash economy? Even the heavy-hitters of my graduating class didn’t get that many offers. Many were lucky to get more than one. And graduation plans are usually made long in advance – not down to the wire to the tune of one week’s notice.</p>
<p>The entire thing just screams ■■■■■ to me, and so I don’t see why we need to treat it seriously. There are certainly many cases where finances and education clash – but this thread is likely not one of them because it’s made up.</p>
<p>The OP did say she was registered under an anonymous name. I won’t repeat the comment in it’s entirety since it was, in fact, edited, but to me it suggested an existing poster concerned about privacy. Also am willing to bet it was not a kid. Kids don’t use some of the expressions in the OP. </p>
<p>Legendofmax, average base salary before bonuses in undergrad Wharton Class of 2010 was high 60s, but the range went up to 100K. Average end of the year bonus is listed at almost 34K and average signing bonus about 9K. Do most kids get offers like that? No, definitely not, but apparently someone did. </p>
<p><a href=“http://www.vpul.upenn.edu/careerservices/undergrad/reports/WHA_2010cp.pdf[/url]”>http://www.vpul.upenn.edu/careerservices/undergrad/reports/WHA_2010cp.pdf</a></p>
<p>Also, EFC said they can afford COA, but the family has overriding financial pressures. If I had no money in the bank for retirement I would draw the line, too, regardless of salary. As for the ten job offers, either you are right, the kid was the cream of the cream, or maybe he was rubbing the salary and all the offers in the parent’s face even if it wasn’t true.</p>
<p>Where did the OP say she was posting under a different name? I dont think any of the posters here saw that.</p>
<p>As for graduation plans, nowhere did it say how far the OP lives from the school. They could have made plans and been uninvited, they could have intended to drive or stay with relatives. I know a kid who left it till the last minute to decide whether or not to attend graduation. It’s not so very far fetched.</p>