@Sue22 The “Her mom sent me swatches, we paid a lot of money to have custom pillows made and my parents spent 7 hours setting up my room” version- not my cup of tea.
Not really my cup of tea either and there is no way that my kids would have allowed my husband and me to spend 7 hours decorating their dorm room! But to each their own…
@SouthFloridaMom9
Thanks for clearing that up, I hate it when I can’t find information in a relevant post. However (unless I missed something), the piece was about dorm rooms in a particular dorm at Ole Miss, not sorority life or rush so the fact that in some (very small, IME) circles it’s important to join certain chapters isn’t really relevant.
The article did say that the girls compete to have the nicest dorm rooms and some here seem to interpret that to be some sort of cut-throat, mean-girl thing based on their own internal biases. I expect that it’s a friendly competition and a way for a group of 17-18 year olds who are away from home to form bonds quickly by being invited to visit each other’s rooms and exclaim over one another’s creativity and color choices. I doubt that they are ostracizing anyone who didn’t bother to coordinate a color scheme with her roommate before arriving. Some kids live in dorms where students compete over gaming systems and skills or who has a collection of the most exotic liquor bottles. That doesn’t imply that the dorm is hostile to other students who aren’t interested in those things although lack of common interests can limit social interaction.
Mainly I just think that once again, this is a way to figuratively beat up on young women for being the “wrong type” of young woman which is sadly common among females.
@Joblue I see your point (sorry if I sounded snarky).
My niece is the perfect example of this. She is girly-girl and creative, but also a very serious student and just an all-around awesome person. Wish I could have known girls like her in high school! I was the quintessential misfit.
I could see some of the girls I couldn’t stand in high school having rooms like this. It’s the precursor to joining KD and getting engaged to a Pike or a Beta. 
But that’s my own projection, as mentioned.
When I first saw the pic, I was SOOO impressed with their creativity. But then I clicked the dorm building via location on instagram and saw that tons of other dorm rooms looked exactly the same, just different colors. Bummer - not so creative.
The only problem I had with the setup was that Old Miss allows kids to bring in their own furniture (I saw full sofas, fancy night stands, etc…) which is not allowed on any of the campuses we visited in the northeast. Kids are not allowed to bring in large furniture. I think this makes sense from a logistics perspective (how many couches were being moved up the stairs at Old Miss during move in day?) and from a competitive perspective (now do all girls feel like they have to buy furniture for their dorms?, how about the kids that can’t afford it).
For the rest of it - the bedding, pillows, stools, etc… to each their own. It looks cute, and if it makes them feel comfy, more power to them.
The door room seemed HUGE! Wonder what the dimensions were.
Here’s a link with some pics - if you’ve missed it:
http://hottytoddy.com/2016/08/19/posh-ole-miss-dorms-over-the-top-or-fabulous/
PG: I remembered this quote:
Okay - Should students and their parents be at all concerned about being “relatable” to other students who may not have the means to do this? Can we relate it back somehow to Paying for the Party where there was an “in group” and an “out group”. Is there a difference between just decorating for yourself, because that is how you will be most comfortable, and decorating as a contest? And then putting it on the internet?
I understand parents who are designers/decorators using this as advertising. It’s their business. It makes sense.
To be honest, I don’t really have very strong feelings about all this. If I was going to get riled up, it would be over the implication that looking for a husband at college, if someone chooses to do so, isn’t a good use of time and says something negative about the young woman with that objective in mind. The smartest women I knew at college, future doctors, lawyers, engineers, were clear they were not only getting an education, but also taking the opportunity to look for a husband who would suit them. Of course, some women don’t want a husband and, obviously, that is just fine, too.
I have always lived in very decorated spaces - yes, even at college. I am sitting in a room with a couple of museum quality collections, acquired at low prices over decades of shopping shows and auctions before prices went out the roof. This only looks like an expensive room if you understand what it is you are seeing. Some folks hope when I get a bit more money I’ll be able to fix things up, and get rid of all these old dishes with staple repairs. I’m pretty snobby about decorating.
Most schools I’m familiar with in the northeast allow furniture like chairs, coaches, etc. but you are not allowed to move school supplied furniture out of the dorm room so space to put things is very limited.
I agree with @suzyQ7’s post - the conformity bothers me more than the decor itself. But I’m a yankee so what do I know. 
I’m also impressed they can keep all that white - including furry white rugs - so clean!
This whole “controversy” speaks to why finding a good fit is important. Different people are happy in different places doing different things.
^^amen @doschicos (fit).
While I agree with fit, this is a state school and some students may not have had a variety of choices.
I though Sue made some very good points here.
Last year, a friend posted gorgeous dorm room Ole Miss pics of her daughter’s room. The impression I got was that the dorm decorating involved both families, which everyone enjoyed doing. (Younger siblings I think painted bookcases that the fathers built.) I enjoyed seeing the pics and reading the stories about how the room came together.
Fast forward to D2’s drop off this year (not to Ole Miss) and I was more than a little nervous since my daughter likes to decorate but leans to an unpolished, youngish style. I remembered my friend’s daughter’s dorm room, and I felt like I was sending an 11yo into the school lunchroom with a Dora the Explorer lunchbox.
But it all worked out, of course. My daughter reports on the beautiful dorm rooms she admires, but doesn’t want, and how many of her friends have complimented her quirky taste. Win. Win.
That’s true about the public school angle and choices, @alh, and I bet there are some girls who just go along with it but wish they didn’t feel they needed to. It’s easy for us, as mainly adults, to make statements that no one has to do it if they don’t want to or can’t afford it, but looking back on our 18 year old selves, moving away from home, its not that simple.
My other concern is where does it go from here? These things tend to get ramped up more and more. High school girls looking at these photos this year may feel pressured to top it next year. I don’t think that is healthy (or affordable!) “fun” for everyone.
ETA: glad to hear there is room for other approaches, @PJackson
Does anyone know how Ole Miss girls tend to handle sophomore year decorating if they don’t stay with their freshmen roommate? Do a lot of girls get singles, do they start over again, or do they live with two styles in one room?
That’s an interesting question.
At the risk of stereotyping I’m going to guess they live in a sorority house sophomore year. I was already thinking this sort of decorating is less a problem to others when it is in a sorority house.
When I first saw this on yahoo or someplace, it didn’t register to me at all as controversial. I wasn’t as thoughtful about it as some of you.
adding: I could see it as a creative endeavor or as just conspicuous consumption. I really care a whole lot about my personal space so I’m pretty sympathetic to decorating a dorm room.
Alh - I knew you would pull that quote! However, my H needs to send certain signals to his patients because he’s asking them to engage/pay him for services. That’s really not the same relationship as between girls on a hallway.
I love hypotheticals, so I’m wondering what the reaction would be if a guy (I’m thinking a gay guy in particular) decorated his room in a fabulous style. Would that be perceived as a “statement” to all the other guys who just have piles of boxer shorts and beer cans. It’s interesting that girl-activities quickly move to a perception of trying to one-up one another.
Re furniture, I just read a recent thread about how suites are unfurnished and students are expected to furnish them. So presumably that included northern schools.
Re ostracizing someone who doesn’t coordinate color schemes - if that’s the case, such girls aren’t worth the time of day so why would you want to be in their social circles?
“It’s interesting that girl-activities quickly move to a perception of trying to one-up one another.”
Vs. the perception that guys are slobs and only gay guys like to decorate their rooms nicely?
My very straight son puts a lot of effort into creating a tasteful, clean space for himself. I think if we are honest, we’re all guilty of some stereotyping and perceptions sneaking into our viewpoints.
After looking thru those pics it is clear to me that it is a competition among the girls at Ole Miss. I have zero problem with it and wish more schools would do it. It’s just simple fun and if you can find a roomie who is on board with it…go for it.
For the record, it was the girls themselves who framed the decorating as a competition.
PG: The gay guys who decorate their dorm rooms (and one of them was my son!) aren’t engaging in a competition on the internet. which impacts dorm life at their colleges. The gay guys may be the only one on their hall doing it. These young women are creating a norm of sorts and it does seem to create competition, maybe a friendly competition, if you are someone able to participate.
Again - remember * Paying for the Party* and the girls on the hall who were left out?
Let’s assume we just sit around at home dripping in furs and diamonds - do we take them with us to the college dorm because that’s just how we roll? Or would it be inappropriate to the circumstances?
FYI - A while back some of us had an impromptu book thread on Paying for the Party. Anyone interested can probably search it. I think it possibly relates back to this thread, and that’s why I’m bringing it up with PG.
LOL, Well guys have always known that there are princess girls and high maintenance girls…I can’t even imagine the “names” that guys would come up with for a guy who decorates fabulously…tongue in cheek.
I think it’s good to take a step back and understand that colleges and universities have been striving for at least 3 decades to attract a variety of students. That means that there will always be the haves and the have nots financially. It’s really pretty “real world” for students to encounter those that have and those that don’t. Presumably many of these kids already know socio-economic stratification from their high schools, but if they don’t it will be there when they hit college. In my opinion there is a difference between the university"sponsoring" a dorm decor contest and students doing things on their own initiative.
I don’t see this as a “problem” that needs solving at all. My kid drove a old Ford sedan through high school. His best 4 buddies drove a Volvo, (way newer than mine) a Mercedes, an Audi and a souped up Jetta GTI. Of course I’m sure my son “wished” he had a car like that but jealousy and envy won’t kill him. Jealousy and envy from kids who take the bus to school and don’t even have a car isn"t abnormal either. I have co-workers that probably spend more money than I on jewelry, or buy more expensive clothes, or drive nicer cars. To even suggest that everyone living in a dorm should refrain from conspicuous consumption so as not to offend those with less is inane. The inability to deal with those inequities is too close to the thought that we aren’t sending resilient kids off to college for my taste.
“LOL, Well guys have always known that there are princess girls and high maintenance girls…I can’t even imagine the “names” that guys would come up with for a guy who decorates fabulously…tongue in cheek.”
brother? friend?