<p>I have trouble speaking up for myself. </p>
<p>I am going on vacation for two weeks with another family (tomorrow) and I’m scared to go. I’m incredibly polite and I suck at saying no when I’m asked to do something. I just hate the reaction I get from these people when I say no. My last vacations with them have been terrible (they even made Disneyworld unhappy for me) and I’m going to a really cool place this year, so I want to enjoy it. The only way I can do that is if I speak up when I want something and by not allowing them to push me around the whole time. I don’t want to seem rude or ungrateful though…what do I do? How can I say no to some things and how do I ask to do things I want to once in a while?</p>
<p>I understand what you mean. When I am around people who aren’t my close family and friends, I tend to politely go along with whatever they want to do.</p>
<p>My advice would be to suggest alternatives that you would prefer doing. For example, if they bring up going to a museum that afternoon and you’d rather not, say something along the lines of “The weather is really nice today. Why don’t we spend some time outside and go to the beach?”</p>
<p>Here’s my experience. My parents got divorced when i was 7, and i lived with my mom. My dad is like the coolest guy in the world, but his new wife is really below average. She’s very cheap and always complains. Like she made my dad drive extra 40 miles at midnight in the middle of nowhere in eastern Canada to look for a crappy and dirty motel for $60 a night because she didnt want to stay in a really nice one but for $67 a night. So she always complains about how expensive stuff is when i ask my dad to buy me something like souvenirs or some food (i have more than enough money to pay for all the stuff myself, but i dont wanna make my dad feel bad). So the way i dealt with her is just ignored her and did much of the stuff like sightseeing on my own or with my dad, and when she was around, i was quiet and always agreed with her. I know i could’ve talked to her and to convince her not to be sich a biach, at least when i’m around, but there’s another story. My dad’s parents were gonna emigrate and live with them, but they came only to go back in 3 weeks, and my dad never talks to them ever since (it was 5 years ago). From what they told me, his wife was the biggest reason they came back. So i dont talk to her seriously because i love my dad too much to risk my relationship with him.
So my advice is to just do whatever you want as long as your friends did not tell you specifically not to do it, and when facing confrontation or argument, just agree with everything and try to find an alternative way to get what you want.</p>