<p>"My daughter will not be going to UC Berkeley this fall. When I broached the idea of applying to my beloved alma mater, she couldn’t have been clearer. “I’m sorry, Mom,” she said, gently patting my hand, “but it’s not my kind of school.”</p>
<p>Not her kind of school? What did that mean? That the crown jewel of the University of California was too urban and overwhelming for her? That she didn’t want to attend a campus lauded for its protest politics and Nobel laureates? Or maybe, I thought in a brief flash of enlightenment, she simply wasn’t interested in attending the same college as her mother?</p>
<p>Ridiculous.</p>
<p>I have made many mistakes, but my decision to go to Berkeley or “Bezerkeley” as my conservative father railed at the time certainly was not one of them.</p>
<p>From the moment I set foot on its historic campus, I loved everything about it. The students hawking petitions. The gorgeous London plane trees lining Sproul Plaza. The chimes of the Campanile. The thrill that no one knew me and the sense that I might meet someone from Greece or Kenya or even New York, places I had imagined but had never been.</p>
<p>Surely my daughter would find the same virtues in Berkeley?</p>
<p>That she did not was only the first of many revelations during the tortuous college application process. And I don’t mean hers.</p>
<p>Since she took her first SAT, I have been continually humbled by my expectations of my daughter, expectations that had very little to do with her and everything to do with me…"</p>
<p>^^I’m in the same situation, not one of my kids had a moment’s consideration for my or their dad’s alma maters. Cute article and one a parent who has been through the process can nod and claim “yes, yes.”</p>
<p>S is at H & my alma mater, and even joined H’s frat. His only negative to going there was that we went there - he finally decided not to let that stop him from going where he really wanted to go. Probably helps that we live 5 hours away so he knows we won’t be dropping in on him.</p>
<p>OTOH, D is at a different college. Alma Mater wouldn’t have been right for her, and we all knew it. </p>
<p>Both are at the school that is right for them, regardless of where H and I attended.</p>
<p>Neither D will attend our alma mater. It is a huge, very highly regarded flagship State U. If I had to do it over again, I wouldn’t go there either. I never figured out how to make it smaller and as a result have little to show for it but the degree and an undying love for its sports teams. </p>
<p>Older D wanted really small, individual attention, and a good department for her proposed major. Younger D wants a mid-size U with sports, big enough to have a wide range of options for an undecided, but small enough for an introverted girl to be able to find friends.
We know that in their hearts they’ll always be fans.</p>
<p>My daughter is at my alma mater (which is also where my husband got his doctorate). Our son wouldn’t have been caught dead there. To each his/her own.</p>
<p>My daughter applied to my alma mater because it was a safety with rolling admissions and her school allowed students to wear the sweatshirts of schools where they had been admitted instead of their uniform shirt. Now THAT is motivation.</p>
<p>We truly did not care which schools our kids applied to. It was all their choice. I could care less if they were interested in my alma mater. </p>
<p>As it turned out, however, older D was very interested in the college that both my husband and I had attended. In fact, it was one of her favorites and even in April of senior year, was one of the final schools she was seriously considering attending. It was kind of interesting to observe. It was fun to go back for the visits with her and see it all over again and in my mind, I knew I would pick the school again for myself. And I can see why it appealed to her. She did not end up attending and I truly did not care at all. She did go to a college that my brother had attended though. And come to think of it, younger D went to the university that my mom had gone to (but never graduated). All that is truly coincidence as nobody suggested to the kids where to apply.</p>
<p>My kids couldn’t get into my alma mater, or H’s alma mater, so they’re not even on their radar screen. Heck, I’m not sure H and I could get into our alma maters today.</p>
<p>Neither of mine thought about my alma mater for even a minute, but my son was truly flabbergasted when his younger sis (by 8 years) wouldn’t apply to his alma mater, even though she was a recruited athlete.</p>
<p>S1 turned down H’s alma mater for undergrad, but is there now for grad. I know H is secretly pleased they have this shared (though different) experience.</p>