The teachers at his old school all reported he was “a pleasure to have in class”, as have did his new teachers at his new school. I don’t think letters of recommendation will be hard to get.
Like I said earlier, the stuff that will get a kid expelled from a private school is laughable in the public school system.
Definitely have the GC mention these offenses. They really put in perspective how mild his delinquencies are.
I had a student who was expelled from a private school and transferred to a public school. I don’t think her transcript said “expelled” but it was clear from it that there was a disciplinary reason for her transfer. I had this student write some paragraphs on what exactly happened, what she learned from it and why it wouldn’t happen again and she included it in the additional info section on her common app. For a school that was a top choice for her, I had her fly to that college and meet with the admission director and basically the student “fell on her sword”. The AD said it impressed her and she felt the student had turned a leave. This particular AD ended up giving my student a great merit award and my student is set to graduate from there this year.
Student got accepted to most of the colleges she applied to. The particular college was a “colleges that change lives college”. This was the first student I had with a discipline problem and we had junior year teachers from the old school write the recs. I was told that it was better the disclosure come from the student rather than the counselor and that the student really demonstrate that they were sorry for what they had done.
So for OP not all hope is lost, just apply to the right colleges and have your son do some kind of volunteer work to demonstrate that he has learned his lesson from what he did and why he will not repeat it.
This is what I do. Send me a PM if you’re interested in getting some professional help with his college process. I have many clients who were expelled from high school as well as college.
“But college AdComms are not dumb; they can read between the lines. And if the student withdrew before completing the school year, then it’s pretty obvious no matter what’s officially not on the transcript.”
Right. I advise him to disclose this to colleges and explain what happened.
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OP…Some great suggestions. I would highly recommend you get a copy of the private school official transcript. There definitely is a good chance your son will get into a top college. My son went to school with a kid that was expelled from an Ivy in 2012 for a frat hazing that resulted in the death of a student. He ended up graduating from a top 25 university (a top public). Still can’t believe he got in as the deceased student had spent time during the incident in the trunk of this kid’s car. Bizarre.
We now have an additional issue. At his old school, he took Honors Spanish 2, Honors Alg2/Trig, Honors Chemistry and H Spanish 3. His new school doesn’t offer those classes, so his transcript reflects a weighted GPA far below what he earned. (Honors Chem just about killed him!) When he starts applying to colleges, does he have BOTH schools send their transcripts, or how does he handle this?
“does he have BOTH schools send their transcripts”
Yes. The cumulative GPA number is not what matters; the whole HS record in context is what matters.
Well, it’s hockey. If there isn’t at least one physical altercation, it wasn’t that good a game.
Jesting aside, definitely disclose that the expulsion happened, but be clear about just how low level his offenses were. One fight during a sport that is notorious for encouraging fighting, a cell phone in class, vulgar insults (even if they were racially charged, well, I said some pretty racially charged stuff at 15 to be edgy, knowing full well that crap was wrong), a uniform violation, and talking in church? In, what, two and a half years? That’s just a teenager being a teenager, and it’s nothing to refuse admissions over.
I will also vote for using a private CC with experience with this kind of situation. Not only can they guide your son, they can pick up the phone and call friends in the admissions offices of schools where he wants to apply and get input on how serious each of them would find this.
A friend of mine in this line of business has a few of these every year, generally involving bigger transgressions.
Fighting in youth and high school hockey is not common. Even rare in college. Quickly dealt with by tossing them out of that game and the next. Parents fighting? Different matter.
Do agree that some Catholic schools are a little rough on the punishment. My daughter got Saturday School for giggling in Mass. I don’t think many colleges would care about that.
@twoinanddone it depends on the team and perhaps the region of the country. It happens pretty often with my S’s high school team. They are not out and out brawls involving multiple players - usually it is between 2 players. But I have seen the brawls as well. Ref usually breaks it up pretty quickly. If they go back at each other, that is when one or both will be taken out of the game.
Not condoning it by any means, if I had my way my S would not be playing the sport. But I was outvoted many years ago.
In case anyone in the future finds themselves in a similar situation and conducts a search on the effect of expulsions on the college application process, I wanted to provide feedback. Basically, even with high stats, your opportunities for acceptance will be SEVERELY impacted by the blemish on your record. Don’t bother applying to any selective colleges – or even any somewhat selective schools. My son was denied from schools which Parchment/Cappex predicted he had an 90% chance of acceptance. He was accepted to an oos university in the midwest, a non-competitive oos school in the west and an in-state state school. He was waitlisted at 3 “match” schools, which we presume will be denials.
The bottom line: either lower your sights, or go the cc route. Also, fight the expulsion with everything you can. We’ve learned the hard way: I don’t want any other kid to go through what my son has been through these past few months.
Wow, @BigSigh, I’m so sorry. Thanks for reporting back here with what you’ve learned. I hope your son makes peace with these choices and picks a school where he will thrive.
@BigSigh , I am glad your son at least has somewhere to go. I am sure he really regrets what happened. It must be stressful for you and your family. If you care to share, it would be helpful to know if you did enlist any outside help, and if you found it useful.
@BigSigh I am sorry for what has happened to your son. In my area, students about to be expelled from private schools seem to be given the opportunity to withdraw before expulsion, so effectively their transgressions are hidden. I don’t think that’s fair.
There is a place on the Common App that permits the student to provide extra information. I’d suggest a quick explanation - this is what I did, this is how I know it was wrong and I paid a significant price for my bad judgement. I learned an important lesson and this will make me a valuable member of the college community.
@BigSigh have your son take a look at the colleges still accepting applications lists that NACAC puts out in early May, if he’s not happy with his options.
@BigSigh I’m sorry your son didn’t get the results he wanted. I went through this with my kid. Her HS didn’t put disciplinary history on the transcript and her strategy was to target schools that don’t ask about it (so no Common App schools). It was still pretty clear from her transcript that something happened junior year. She just did her research and found schools that used their own applications and didn’t ask about every HS disciplinary event (some only ask about cheating and violent offenses, which she could answer “no” to). Still, I had read horror stores about these kids having difficulty getting acceptances anywhere.
As a kid who wasn’t targeting highly selective schools anyway, she did well with her applications (7/7) with her most competitive school being UMN, Twin Cities (OOS), which I guess is not even somewhat selective by CC standards. She is very happy where she landed.
@BigSigh is takes a lot of courage and concern to share something like that for the good of others. Thanks so much for that. We do feel your pain and wish for the best outcome.
I was wondering if more experienced people thought a well-positioned Gap Year would reverse the effects, and possibly even benefit, showing growth and maturity?