<p>@dukie11, </p>
<p>christ thats how my parents are too ("constantly telling me I had personality problems or didn’t have any friends, or making fun of the way I looked or walked or talked, ")</p>
<p>my dads an alchoholic too so that makes it suck even more basically ;(</p>
<p>ugh but at least once junior/senior year is over and im off to college i know i finally have escaped them (i’ve told myself I refuse to apply to anywhere within 1.5 hours of my home)</p>
<p>I’m Chinese, and my relationship with my parents is sort of sine-wavish. In elementary and middle school, it was “OMG 97? Where are the other three points?” In early high school, it was, “Don’t overextend yourself. Why take AP World History? That’s a useless subject.” And now they’re starting to be pushy again. </p>
<p>I think I do have some emotional problems, though. Like low self-esteem. Ironically, it’s just been intensified by my strong performance in school. I don’t know-- it just feels sort of wrong and improbable that I’m doing so well, so I tell myself that I’d never be valedictorian at a different school, that I’ll never get into an Ivy League school, etc. It’s funny, because I can be sort of arrogant sometimes too. It varies.</p>
<p>I think all the Asian stereotypes affect me, too. We’re supposed to be heroin-chic skinny and good at math, right? I’m… not. The fact that my dad was doing college-level math by age thirteen makes me feel, well, like an idiot. I was overweight as a child, and I’ll never be thin. My mom occasionally makes comments about my putting on weight, half-jokingly. I try to brush it off, but it bothers me.</p>
<p>I admit to having emotional problems in the past. When I was in middle school my academic performance was ridiculously strong, and so my parents would criticize me on how I looked instead, comparing me to other rail-thin asians and yelling at me if I ate ice cream. I turned to anorexia and dropped to 90 pounds at a height of 5’8". They congratulated me on how thin I was. It took a long time to break out of that. I think that as a result though, I’ve learned to treat all of their disparaging comments with a happy indifference. It’s taken six long years to get there, but what they say doesn’t affect me anymore. I have my Bs and even one C+, and I have my friends that my parents don’t approve of, but I know who I am, and I like it.</p>
<p>I don’t think I could ever be that secure, apathy! My parents would consider me a failure and I would feel terrible about myself. It doesn’t really matter to my parents whether I have friends, am happy, or “know who I am,” if I don’t meet their standards of success. I guess they really don’t understand the importance of respecting feelings.</p>
<p>sorry to hear what you went through, apathy. i have friends who also went through the same thing (asian as well)</p>
<p>I’m an Indian and I don’t have a low self-esteem but I don’t have a good relationship with my parents. I went through serious depression when i was in eighth grade to tenth. My parents always criticized my on my grades every since I started school. Good job apathy, I still havn’t been able to break their wrath. And I totally agree with you dukie11.</p>
<p>Oh and a bit of trivia; Alaska is the most suicidal state.</p>
<p>I’m Filipino-American (still can’t decide if that’s Pacific Islander or truly Asian), and you can say that the relationship between me and my parents is quite turbulent. And no, it’s not about grades. Or maybe it is… </p>
<p>Let’s put it this way. I love to achieve, but my parents would rather me be an average student. They worry about my health, as I get easily sickened, and I can understand that, though sometimes they can overreact to such little things and sometimes their rationale for not letting me participate in certain activities is kind of skewed. I sometimes worry that I might not be able to go out of state for college just because of how they are. </p>
<p>And yeah, I have a psychiatric disorder (bipolar disorder), but I’ve had abnormal behavior and mood patterns since I was little;, obviously due to a chemical imbalance. Though I can say that I put it on myself to worsen my depressive episodes, mainly because I set really high standards and am quite hard on myself when I don’t exactly achieve my goals.</p>
<p>LovelyBonsai, we’re asian… (which sorta puts us in a disadvantage in terms of competing with the crazy smart super asians out there :P) My parents are always pushing me to the limits, but they don’t even know what SATs and Ivy-leagues are either. My dad confuses the SATs with the college-entrance exams in the Philippines, thinking they’re the same thing…</p>
<p>I admit, I have low self esteem too. And some times I can be too hard on myself. But in order to get through hard times I just have to keep telling myself that my parents want what’s best for me and there are people who are in an even worst predicament than I am.</p>